The Anti-social way of Socializing in Asia Part 2. —— Why Asian people enjoy having dinner in a private room? (Original)
Greetings fellow Steemians! How are you today? Today i'm having a look at another interesting topic about culture. Previously I've talked about KTV being a conventional way of socialising in asia and how it differs from Karaoke in the west.
And also a little on the etiquette's of dining in China.
All pictures below other than those marked with sources are of my own photography
In Western countries, dinner gatherings are an opportunity for me to to socialise with my friends. In China, socialising over dinner is an opportunistic way of bonding with your existing friends but also to build connections with new ones. Often seen as a medium over which society conducts it's cementing of relationships.
Dinner in Western Countries ..
In the West, we like to be more spontaneous and walk around, looking for a restaurant that takes our fancy.
People with high status often enjoy their meals casually and in a public setting.
Source.
Dinner in China..
Usually an invitation to dinner will mean dining in a private room and over a large round table...
Source.
Because Chinese people like to eat together and share their food, the big round table will have a rotatable turntable for moving the dishes from person to person.
In a private room, there is often a private toilet as well as a tea table and sofas. These are used for guests who arrive early who will often have some tea and a chat before dinner begins.
Source.
I think it is due to Chinese habit, also depend on the difference between dietary mood.In my opinion, part of the reason is habitual. But it also forms the basis of the cultural disparity in dining.
1.Eating in a private room is a social need in China. Actually, the Chinese don't always eat in a private room. Most of the time, private dining is reserved for distinguished guests or important events. Private rooms are more conducive to discussions requiring a quiet atmosphere. It's also a gesture of respect to guests.
2.Private room dining also emphasises the preference of Chinese people to socialise in small groups. Whether it's for work, or personal pleasure, Chinese people like to socialise with people close to them. A family is considered a small group too, and it is an example of a social group that prefer's it's interactions with each other in a private setting, away from prying eyes and ears of strangers.
3.A private room is also considered a way of giving face to it's guests. For me, even with a luxury dining environment, I feel very constrained and find it difficult to enjoy my dinner whilst staying relaxed. However, for the sake of giving face, Chinese people prefer this mode of dining and it remains a standard practice for all Chinese people.
Hopefully you've learnt something about the mindset of Chinese people when it comes to private dining.
I hope that through my blog(s), I can bridge the gap in cultural understanding and help promote cultural exchange. Of course, I'm also learning new things all the time.
If you have any questions about the Chinese cultural habits, i'd be happy to answer any questions you might have!
亲爱的Steemit朋友们，你们今天过得好吗？今天我想继续我中西文化差异的话题，你可以在这里找到我介绍Part 1，讲的是KTV文化。还有介绍中西方餐桌礼仪的有趣文章。 在国外，我们和朋友吃饭，通过饭桌上的社交, 认识新的朋友. 在中国也一样，大家喜欢把吃饭当作我们在社会中，认识新朋友或者和老朋友加深感情的一种社交行为。
在国外吃饭 我们喜欢随便在街边找一家餐馆，进去就吃。身份地位再高的人也不会进包房吃饭或者订座。
在国内吃饭 如果说晚上吃饭, 那就意味着你要去一个包间, 里面有一个大圆桌。
因为中国喜欢合餐，桌上有个转盘，专门为了移动菜盘的...当然包间里除了有一个大圆桌，有时候还会有沙发、茶几、洗手间...在没有开始用餐之前，早来了的客人可以先在沙发上聊天、喝茶。来自我的摄影——去西安旅游的时候，父母的朋友请我们吃饭的地方包厢里被很好的装饰，里面有时候会提供电视，让客人在吃饭的同时可以看电视。开始用餐的时候，每个座位前都有一套餐具...餐厅明明是用来社交的场所，为什么中国人更喜欢在一个密闭的小空间吃饭，和朋友一起吃饭，交流感情？而且从吃饭的角度来讲，在热闹的大堂吃饭，不是会更有食欲，气氛更好吗？你们有没有感到好奇？我觉得包房吃饭是中国人的习惯，实质上也是一种饮食方式的差异：
- 包房吃饭一种交际的需求。其实，中国人并不是在所有情况下都要求在包房吃饭，只有请尊贵的客人吃饭或者举行某些重要的聚餐等特殊情况才会选择包房。因为在包房吃饭，环境比较安静，非常适合聊天，场合看起来也会比较正式一些，是对被邀请人的一种尊重。
- 包房的出现, 体现了中国人的社交以小群体的形式存在。中国人不管是在社会上工作还是生活，都比较倾向于是熟人之间的来往。当然家庭是他们最小、最温暖的一个小群体。而小群体自然是相对封闭的，有时候的谈话交流内容，不愿意被外人听到。
- 包房也是一种“给面子”的方式。在密闭的空间吃饭，环境这样高档，会让我感觉很拘束，不能很自由的吃喝。不过这是一种给“面子”的体现，这也是很多中国人所追求的。
说了这么多，大家是不是对中国这种奇特的吃饭方式更加了解啦？
我希望为中西方文化搭一座桥梁，促进文化与文化之间的交流，让大家可以更好的认识并理解中西方文化的差异。当然如果你有什么问题，欢迎你们的提问，我们一起交流！
If you are interested in my other blogs related to Culture Exchange please check out these other blogs below=^ ^=
The Anti-social way of Socializing in Asia.
Why you don't see Chinese girls wearing Bikini's at the beach?
The Marriage Dilemma.
Having a Naked Marriage isn't a bad idea at all！
China's leftover women - Single and not necessarily successful！
Lost in Translation - Filial Piety
It reminds me so much of communal dining when my father was stationed in Korea. Our living room always converted into a dining room where we sat on the floor around a large table and everyone picked their food selection from the center. Sadly, my family is scattered and we rarely eat together anymore, but when we do, the food is placed on a huge table and we generally fill out plates and sit around the fire. Not exactly traditional, but we're making our own :)
I think the spirit of the family union is still there. After all, sitting around the fire together sounds very familial!
༼✿ @sweetsssj
I do like the Chinese way (and other cultures too) of the food being in the center and everyone sharing. @sweetsssj did talk us through some of the chopstick etiquette for doing this in a previous post (thanks @sweetsssj!).
Ah... etiquette for chopsticks (Meredith's American version): throw them over your shoulder. Use communal serving spoons and forks...use personal silverware to prevent "double dipping" LOL
Haha, i think "double dipping" isn't seen as an issue over here. Sometimes I see somebody with severe cold and prefer not to touch anything they've touched though..
༼✿ @sweetsssj
In my opinion the food is always at the center, unless, of course, you do not eat at the bar. But anyway, a round table looks pretty nice.
P.S. I do not know how to use chopsticks, but do not tell anyone about this 😇
Thanks! I think it has very noble intentions and many people appreciate the closer contact as well as privacy which helps them ease into conversation. Particularly about more sensitive issues.
༼✿ @sweetsssj
i like the way also we clean things with Tea :)
Oh yes, how could I forget! I remember my foreign friends being very surprised by that haha.
༼✿ @sweetsssj
I do think in a private you are are more free to express yourself and engage with the people. At times, when the group becomes more noisy, it is also less disturbing to other customers in the restaurant in a way. :-)
Yes, I agree and in the converse too, when other's become too noisy, in your private room the noise is reduced!
༼✿ @sweetsssj
:-) that's is true indeed.
@sweetsssj upvoted!
Yes, it is indeed like this in Asia.
It's the same in the Philippines, we just call those private dining rooms VIP rooms. I think Orientals just took it way up to the highest level.
I've experienced this with my Oriental students and it was way awkward at first as you have to follow a certain dress code. Getting invited on those doesn't happen very easy either. I like the private sushi party I attended with one of my Japanese student who was an ambassador in the Phils back then and migosh - I have to say - food on private room dining is freaking DIVINE.
Yes, it is like this in the West. I prefer this better to be honest, specially in the economy that we are having now. China seem to be booming so enjoy ;)
I agree with you englishchrivy, for the most part I also enjoy meals in public as well. Most of the time, my private meal gatherings are with elders and I don't have much to say. I also enjoy watching people which of course is only possible in public!
༼✿ @sweetsssj
Any chance that you could write a piece on the concept of guanxi?
I feel like this story touches upon some of the ideas of it, and that you're doing a great job of illuminating Chinese culture. There aren't many people doing what you're doing, thank you for that!