Just about a couple days before my departure. I was laying on the floor of my room, staring empty at the ceiling wishing to quit. I was also flipping my blade while reminiscing all of the things I did and failed. I was wondering how long I could survive or how ungrateful I was to be alive with all of my pieces perfectly attached.

Why everything was always gray? I thought

My mind wandered too far till it sent me to my sleep.

I woke up the next the morning to an E-mail notification about my flight and the hostel reservation. I panicked instantly and having the thought to call it off. Then, I remembered I hate the misery of the weekend when I got nothing to do than self loathing.

What could be wrong?

I packed all my belongings and found myself in the airport waiting for the flight. It got delayed about 6 hours but that was a minor problem among all the problems.I managed to learn a little art of patience thus when everyone else was mad for something they couldn’t control, I sat back,, relaxed listening to the playlist I compiled earlier.

Fast forward, because of the bed bugs problem. @joannewong and @aaronleang were very nice to let me stay at their condominium. They had a best view in town overlooking the twin tower and all the beautiful buildings that to me look like Sim City.

During the night of my stay, I had a chance to sit and talk with Joanne. I told her my story and she gave me advices that made me realize life works in a strange way. She was the sister I never had even we just talked couple of days.

Soon, we found ourselves playing the if game

If I quit that day, I would never get a chance to see this amazing view

If I out of nowhere I didn’t talk to joanne on discord about my visit, I wouldn’t even be at her place nor taste the delicious salad she made me.

We talked till we forgot there were eggs on the pan. As we smell something burned, we realized we smoked the whole place. what a relief we didn't turn on the fire alarm !

I felt so much better that night and had more better insights. There are so many places to see, so many foreign lands I have yet to visit. Why would I have given up now?

For others who are struggling, by experience, I understand the pain is unbearable. We might made wrong decisions here and there. Indulge in something harmful.But for sure, there is always a way to get out of this. Reaching out to the right person is the first step.

The past is the past, we can't change them nor let it define the way we shape the future.

I found myself in love with the foreign land, with all the new experiences I had. I realized how little I've seen this world.

as Z said to myself,

You are alone but you're not alone

A very huge gratitude to joanne and aaron who have hosted me very well. Listened and answer my questions about places. Took me to eat at awesome places. I will make sure to come visit again in nearby future. Not to mention, all the awesome people I met during my stay. A shout out to all these people in no particular order,

@howtostartablog, I finally get to see him and doing a small OCD meetup 😃
@zord189 who happen to be very bubbly and easy-going
@nomadicsoul, who I can't really describe in just a word because she's awesome! and we shared similar struggles while crossing the street,
@orangila who is inspiring to myself for doing a job that he loves to do. He's a professional photographer, don't forget to check his page
@elizacheng with her lovely daughters who I fancy and amazed because they were tiny for their age.
@karinzdailygrind and so many more..

Finally, cheers to many more flights,

With ❤️ macchiata

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