Being a father, you ask? What’s it like?

Being a father, you ask? What’s it like?

I’d love to thank @carlidos for his amazing suggestion for today’s content. Yesterday I struggled for most of the day for something to write, and, on his motivational post below, he suggested some content for me. Unlucky for me that at the time I had just posted! But, there’s always today, and today I’m going to write about Fatherhood

https://steemit.com/life/@carlidos/regain-control-of-your-time-and-finally-get-things-done

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As a young man I had never thought about being a father. I could barely control myself, never mind a kid.

And kids, they are yucky and smelly and pooey I thought,

And if I’m really damn lucky I might get some sleep in between it all,

Yeah, I loved sleep.

So whenever I was asked the question in my twenties about children I would always say no, because I liked my life, I wanted to come in and put my feet up and maybe doze off.

You couldn’t do that with kids.

I was always against it. I mean I loved the nights out, the partying, and the drinking,

Christ the drinking was amazing.

But one fateful day I grew up.

I spotted her at work, she wasn’t there for long, and she always graced my office space with a smile that would light up the entire room.

She was strikingly beautiful, and she would glide around the room with such grace.

And she made me feel amazingly comfortable around her. She made me happy.

I asked her out on a date one day, and the rest is history.

Two years later we were Married.

Our son was a wedding day child, or near that day, but I remember the feeling of immense satisfaction envelope my entire existence when I had found out.

Like I had achieved one of the purposes of my life.

I shouted my success from the rooftops, like a rooster calling in a days beginning. I wanted everyone to hear, to know, that I was no longer a failure at life

And my friends can stop with the dud squirting jokes lol.

Yet, I was to quickly realise that my job had only just began.

I remember when the nurse told my wife that she was [x]cm dilated and the colour drain out of my face.

I realised that the thought of having done what I had done was amazing, but now that I have to act. I was afraid.

Two days after my Son was born, he was back home with us, sleeping in his own little cot beside us. That must have been the scariest god damned night of my life.

I was terrified. Absolutely terrified.

Why?

Because my Dad had taught me everything wrong on what a father should be like. I was scared for my sons upbringing, his safety, his learning,

Everything!

I must have worried myself sick about every single stage of his life that first night he came home.

The stark realisation that I would be responsible for absolutely everything this child is involved in, was a dark constricting fear clutching at my throat, trying to choke me into saving this little baby’s life.

Turns out, I wasn’t such a bad father after all.

And the fact that I panic and worry is a good thing. I doubt my dad ever did with me.

I’ve taught him so much already of what it is to be a man already, to worry, to cry, to feel, to get angry. That it’s natural and that he should never feel bad for being who he is.

If he’s angry, I let him. Chances are he’s angry for a valid reason. Who am I to tell him otherwise?

He won’t get his way, though. Being angry doesn’t mean you get your way. But he’s allowed to ‘be himself’

If you were angry how would you feel if I told you that feeling that way isn’t right? And that you should calm down?
You’d want to knock me out, right?

So I let my Son feel.

A beautiful gift I wasn’t afforded.

And I take him out places. Boy the places our family have been.

Lovely.

And I involve myself with his life. So I talk to him lots and play with him at home, and try to understand what he’s interested in playing.

More importantly I listen to him. I see lots of kids not being listened to today, which is a shame.

I try to let him speak and I listen to him. What he has to say is just as valid as what we have to say.

But I’m not without my faults

And I do make mistakes

And chances are he’ll grudge some of them,

But I’ll be there to apologise if he does ever bring them up.

Because I love my son, and I can’t bare thinking he’s hurting in a way he shouldn’t be.

What about you? What are your favourite/worst parent/child moments? I’d love to hear them!

And more importantly,

Be awesome!