WHY SELF-CONFIDENCE WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE
Self confidence gives you optimism, motivation, faith, respect, and so much more that all projects into the world, which influences you're everyday life.
With low self-esteem you’re going to find yourself feeling bad about yourself and everything you do will be less enjoyable.
At the same time though, low self-esteem is something that you will ‘give off’ to others. This radiates from you whether you mean for it to or not and in turn, this can weaken the impact you have on others.
This is similar to yesterdays post on love, when you have love you will have confidence, you will have an aura around you that will impact everyone around you because they want that, it makes them feel good.
If you act as though you are worthless and if you don’t take chances, then people will treat you as though you’re worthless and you won’t find opportunities.
The Bad Guys
This is why ‘bad guys’ will famously get all the girls. These are the guys that don’t care what others think of them and that do whatever they want. This comes across as confidence and it happens to be very attractive.
The same is true for women. A woman who is a 6 out of ten can beat an 8 out of ten if she knows how to flirt (which comes from confidence) and if she dresses to impress (which comes from confidence!).
Fitting In
The same goes for your career and the same goes for the way you fit in with your friends.
We all know people who are supremely confident and we know that they are highly attractive and highly successful. We all want to be like those people.
If someone has confidence we are drawn to them because we think it will boost our status. Meanwhile though, someone who thinks nothing of themselves will be ignored and will be taken advantage of.
HOW TO BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE
External confidence is much easier to acquire but it’s the internal confidence that will make the real difference to who
you are and how you feel about yourself.
Change what you can about yourself to align yourself more with what you think a successful individual should
be. For example, most of us feel that people who are more attractive and smarter are more successful.
One of the biggest reasons that we might feel bad about ourselves is that we don’t like the way we look.
One of the best ways to change the way we feel about our looks is to make some kind large change. A makeover might sound like a cheesy way to give ourselves a confidence boost but it really does work.
The key here is to be bold and to change things about yourself that you would normally be shy to change. You want to make changes that people will actually notice so that when you walk into a room, heads turn. You want people to think of you in a different way than they did before and you want to feel like a new person.
Watch my video instead or continue reading...
Most of us can think of some outfits that we dare not wear but that we know look good on confident, attractive people.
Guess what?
You’re attractive too and the only thing missing is the confidence. Wear that outfit and you’ll look that confident and that will make you feel much more confident.
If you show that you think you’re ‘worth it’ then this sends powerful signals too.
Internal Confidence
If you want to truly upgrade your confidence then you need to do more work on that internal feeling of contentment.
It comes from learning to stop worrying what other people think.
This is what confidence really is. The most confident person in the room is the person who spreads themselves out in a way that isn’t done to make them ‘look more impressive’ but which is done in a way that makes them feel comfortable regardless of what others think.
The truly impressive person is the person who isn’t afraid of upsetting someone with what they say. They aren’t about to agree with the general consensus just so that they can feel liked. They speak their mind – while of course still being respectful to others.
So how can you get to this stage? Where you genuinely stop caring what others think?
You have to know what’s important to you. Spend some time reflecting and finding what your life’s ‘goal’ is, what your true purpose is and what you want to accomplish.
Start working toward that goal and focusing your energy on those things that matter to you. And once you’ve done that, you will be able to shrug off the insults or the opinions of others.
Knowing yourself and judging yourself by your own standards will make you immune to the judgments of others and will help you to strengthen your resolve and your determination.
And now, you will become someone who is much more interesting and much more engaging. Your passion will be apparent in the way you speak and the fact that you aren’t so worried about what other people think of you will make you much more enigmatic and interesting. People you aren’t trying to please everyone around you, other people are going to start trying to please you.
Now you must go out and train your confidence
If you are usually too shy and un-confident to speak in public for example, this is going to be the perfect way to practice your new esteem. Force yourself to speak up in front of people. Better yet, force yourself to get it wrong on purpose so that you learn to face the music.
*Remind yourself: It doesn’t matter what these people think and the worst that can happen is that you bemuse a stranger.
Practice talking to people and striking up conversation and always remind yourself that it doesn’t matter what happens. You are developing yourself into the person that you want to be and that is all that matters. You can even try joining classes.
Put yourself out there in uncomfortable situations and continue to develop yourself and that confidence.
@bitdollar
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My recent trip to Mexico
Yes, it's the journey and not the destination :)
Oh yes! :)
Full SP for you my friend. Every advice you provide is exactly what I would say. Confidence in a person is almost everything they have to make things happen for them. Everything you attract is because you believe is possible for you because you are confident about it. The universe can't give you anything unless if you don't ask for it with confidence.
So true! I let this go in my speech at times and it sure does show how it makes a difference. When you speak with conviction, people believe, you can influence. Thanks so much @javybar!
Love the idea behind this post. Self confidence is a great thing to have, but people can have a lot of trouble getting it in their lives. One thing I've noticed over time is that, those who should be self confident have a lack of it, while those who really shouldnt be self confident have too much of it. Interesting how that works out
That is interesting. It is a great thing to have and I think the ones who don't have it, may not because they are timid and trying to come across in a polite manner. If we are good people, having confidence is great to get our message across and expand it into the world. Thanks so much for this @jasonshick!
Agreed, there is a lot that goes in to confidence. Do you read a lot of self help books? I've been reading in this category for a few years, all different types of self improvement and it has been a great journey, small changes over time really add up
Yes all the time. I never use to read and now do daily. I love self improvement and real life books. Non-fiction. It has been an amazing journey for me as well. Feel better with more clarity each and everyday it feels. Anything you recommend? I am currently just reading a biography on Abraham Lincoln as it is Charlie Mungers favorite person he learned from. Love learning from people also on top of the specific self help books.
So many truths on this post. Thank you very much for sharing! :)
Thanks @flashfiction!
Re: Internal Confidence
For People to work on themselves (& really get to know themselves), I have a #TIP on a great Book (not just Good, but GREAT). It has all Sorts of vitally impor. exercises that "flesh out the TRUTH" about oneself .
Highly suggest you ALL investigate this book (which u can get for CHEAP at Amzn) - USE in Tandem w/ a Goal-Setting #APP ..Like Goal-Buddy.com .
It's 'FINDING YOUR OWN NORTH STAR' by M. Beck
Very good post Bitdollar . As you say to yr Audience, "You need to do more work on that internal feeling of contentment." -- I Sincerely Feel my suggestion will help many. ♥
Awesome. I love reading and will put that on my list! Thanks @janashby!
Realizing the fact that’s other people’s opinion don’t really matter is a difficult but important step in order to grow as a person.
Of course, saying it is easy, the difficult thing is actually overcome this way of thinking and naturally stop wondering about the opinion others might have about ourself.
What you say are great advices and should be taken into practice. But again, it’s easy to say it, much more difficult to do it. That’s why we need to really make an effort if we want to overcome this handicap
Ya you are right. Easy said then done. It is tough at first and that is why we need to continue to practice and work on it. Thanks for the add @dedicatedguy!
Very encouraging to many, thank you for being so positive and uplifting. This is my second motivational blog i read today, must be that i had such a sad day. nice to finally read something you wrote. Your fellow STEEMengineer, Casandra.xx
I read stuff on topics like this everyday. It always keeps my spirits up and builds me up, my character and wisdom as a person. Keep your spirits up, it is all mindset. Thanks so much for reading and commenting @eaglespirit!
My sad day was going to a law enforcement funeral, you may have seen it on the news. Poor kid 29 years old was shot while on a call in Colorado. Approx 3k in attendance and it was one of the most amazing ceremonies I’ve seen. I’m thinking of writing about it but it brings up the controversy of Is it okay to kill a cop, I’m debating. Thank you for sharing a post that helped me digest yesterday. xx
Ps. I had a lot of confidence issues growing up and still do at times. Your post is very real.
Sorry for the loss. It is unfortunate. I think writing a post that brings some positive awareness wouldn't hurt. When I think of death I am reminded to respect it because without death there can be no life. We must appreciate that and then look to the other positives such as preventing issues like that in the future.
Look to continue to trian your mindset to help with confidence issues or any for that matter. Our mind is a wondering ball of thoughts influenced by the world if we do not have a control on it.
Have a fantastic day! Keep in touch @eaglespirit.
Self-confidence is truly important and it really has the greatest impact on life. To gain confidence one should be kind of brave and determined.
Also, to my mind confidence - this is not a one-step thing. You become more and more confident gradually. And as I see it - it is a never-ending process if you develop and improve yourself.
It is surprising how impactful it is on life. I am gaining so much more clarity on it.
Kind, brave, and determined. I love that.
I agree it has to be worked on continuously, as it is a pattern we need to form. Unless it is already ingrained in ourselves, we need to develop the habit.
Love your commentary @aleksandraz!
Im pumped by your post! Do need a dose of confidence! No pain no gain!
Yes, love that! We must just do it! Have it and live by it! It is only beneficial and we must become our best selves!
Self-confidence, not to be confused with ego as many haters often tend to do.
You got that right! Ego is a self destructing mechanism. We must just use it to give us the energy to push for the good loving things. But it is negative and I do everything I can to diminish it. Thanks for the add @fknmayham!