Face-to-Face with Terror and I can't breath [What are shadow people?] My personal experience coming up-close and personal with a shadow being!
Every experienced magus at some point or another reaches an experience which proves to them beyond a shadow of doubt (heh) that the world around them is not as though it seems. There are things which our eyes record, yet go unnoticed as our perception is not capable of receiving the information in the form which it remains naturally. For example, ultraviolet light and infrared light are both completely invisible to our cognition as a human being. We have created instruments to measure these invisible realities to show their existence.
All around us there exist realities which we cannot readily discern as they appear invisible to sight. Though, from time to time, our other senses seem to show something different. We perceive sudden threats when we are alone and relaxed in a calm environment. We hear people mumbling in the distance when isolated in nature. We smell roses, or baking cookies, when walking through an old building with lots of history.
Western psychology is quick to dismiss these ideas as the misfiring of a damaged, malnourished, or deprived mind and body system: crazy, they say. However, throughout most other cultures there are countless mentions and experiences of ideas that reach beyond our nature and senses.
In my previous post, The Shadows are Alive!, I explain a little about what Shadow Beings are and mentioned that I would share my personal experiences with them. This post is about the first time I ever encountered one of these entities face-to-face.
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As my fellow psychonaughts will have already known, psychedelics and other entheogens allow you to perceive a larger scale of ideas and realities. Obviously, some will cause pure mind-generated hallucinations, but those are generally very powerful deleriants and disassociatives such as datura and PCP (but that's not to say that these molecules as well cannot produce a more full innerstanding and outward perception). You don't take a hit of acid and then you're talking to blue monkeys and green zebras about the next game of quidditch you're suddenly desiring.
This experience report begins with myself at the age of 16 years old and a good friend, J. We were at J's house and had been smoking cannabis all day and it was nearing midnight. The house had always seemed haunted to J and I. We would constantly hear someone walking up and and down the stairs that were above his room leading into the basement where he slept. They would start upstairs in the kitchen and walk down the stairs, walk back up the stairs, then back down the stairs and the sound would quit. We would hear voices of people talking upstairs in the kitchen. All kinds of freaky occurrences that would increase in frequency after the sun went down.
Earlier in the day, we had purchased a couple of pressed ecstasy pills which we had planned to take after his parents had gone to bed. As I began to peak on my roll, I had to use the restroom something fierce. So I turned out of his basement bedroom to the left and started down the hall to the bathroom at the far end on the right. The hall was built very small and the walls were so close together that a too-broad-of-a-shouldered man would have to walk sideways. At this moment though, there seemed to be no room for even myself as the navy blue carpets and walls blended together in the dark. I chuckled at myself and at how my eyes were perceiving the miniscule hallway built for Slenderman and walked onward to the restroom and relieved myself, and let's face it - anyone who's done drugs will agree, bathrooms are funny when you're high.
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As I went to leave from using the toilet, I had my left hand on the light switch and I froze in the doorway directly upon the threshold. To my left just outside of the bathroom leaned against the wall with its feet (if that's what you want to call them) off the ground and pinned against the wall, as were its hands against the wall behind its head, was a beast of sorts that was more black than the dark of the night which it used as a backdrop. It had wisps of "smoke" flowing from its midsection outward and dissipating quickly inches from its body. There were what appeared to be spikes several inches long coming from its body and all over. It was about 6 feet tall with its legs bent beneath it, tucked against the wall.
Moments prior I had been laughing and giggling at the random thoughts and flashes of serotonin as I watched myself urinate in the mirror. Now my heart had frozen and no air would escape or enter my lungs. Every hair on my body stood upon end and my skin turned cold as ice. I would call it panic, or pure terror, but there are no words or phrases I am aware of in any language that describes the feelings and emotions I experienced at that time.
After several infinitely long moments, I slowly turned my head to face this creature. The whole time I was watching this thing from my peripheral it sat there calmly not making any noise or movements. When my head had fully turned to face this shadow creature, its head snapped quickly to the right and bared its featureless face and screeched a high pitch sound. It then used its hands to crawl backward down the wall toward the ground, and in-between its feet it stopped and repeated this sound before continuing all the way through the floor into the ground, disappearing from sight.
I regained control of my thoughts and my body and ran down the hall into my friends room to find him singing punk rock songs. I explained to him what I saw and we both laughed it off explaining it as some trick of the mind, though we both knew we were kidding ourselves and that we had no idea what it was that I had just encountered.
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This was my first time coming face to face with one of these creatures and it left me terrified for weeks. I had seen them in my peripheral dashing about for many years. I had even occasionally seen them in my main view in the distance or across the room. Never had I been merely inches away from one of these known-unknowns. I do not think I was supposed to see that one so close. I do not think that it was aware of my alter state of consciousness. I do not know what the fuck it was.
I will be making another post about the first time I was physically assaulted by one of these entities, and when I learned how to defeat the malicious nature of these entities.
LOVELAUGHTER&&XHAOS
PALPABLE POPE Ypyskypo Skwyrl, the Y'sas
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The fact that there are no words to describe what an encounter feels like is true. It is very ominous and alien feeling. In my encounter it shocked my mind (not electricity like). I was stunned and babbling as I tried to regain control. Also in my case I had entered the stage of my life where I had no interest in any kind of drugs or alcohol. I am still in that stage. So my encounter happened when I wasn't on anything. I don't say that to make myself better than you. I have no problems with people taking drugs. I simply prefer not to myself. I mention it for those that may think your encounter was due to drugs. My encounter, and the encounters I have been a peripheral participant in were drug free.
What these things are is speculation. We can guess, and we'll likely be wrong. They do respond to fear and the battery like nature someone afraid seems to radiate. I do not fear them at this point, but my body naturally reacted to them unlike anything else I have ever encountered on my first encounter.
It was almost like the thing had a field around them that when it crossed my body, my body began shouting alien alarms that I never had encountered before. It was not chills, it was not tingling. It was just a wave of sudden overwhelming terror of a presence and something that was not a pleasant thing.
I have speculative hypothesis about some aspects of these things. Yet that is all they are as I do not put these hypothesis to test. If it were just my wife and I living at my house I might test such ideas. However, I will not put others unwillingly at risk to test hypothesis. My wife would be a willing participant, the rest of my family might not. Her elderly parents live with us who are practicing LDS members and they actually could cause problems with the control and some of my hypothesis, so I would not attempt anything with them present.
I could travel to a remote location to test some things. That may be safe, but I cannot guarantee it so for now my hypothesis will remain untested and unproven and purely speculation on my part.
I give thanks to you for sharing about your experience and being sober. I am well aware that many will doubt me and suggest that it was the drugs that I was under the influence of which produced such an experience, as so I appreciate your input. Personally, I am an avid practitioner of the poison path. I hold each molecule in deep regards. They themselves are "gods", as are we (I believe that each thing is an integral part of "God"[the mass collective universe] and are therefore "divine" in nature), and have access to information that is external of our singular-consciousness.
As you wrote, fear seems to be a, if not the main, source of energy for these entities. They flock to Fear like seagulls on the beach. In my personal system of thought there are two polarities of thought energy: Love & Fear. Love creates, Fear destroys. Love is syntropic, Fear is entropic. All other emotions are levels of Love or Fear. I have found that they are weakened by the energies of Love - literally just think happy thoughts and they lose all power. Sometimes it is difficult and you have to be persistent, but it always works if you hold steadfast. I too no longer fear them, and it is from the experience of where I learned how to defeat them using happy thoughts, haha. I still see them, I still feel them, but I no longer deal with their assaults as they have no effect on me.
Yes, I too believe that living with practicing LDS members would highly interfere with the controls. Traveling to remote locations -may- be safe, but it sounds as though you would be having to call to these things. That signal could bear a psychic scar that would light up in the meta-world like a beacon even after dissolving the signal; sure it could be healed - but that would take time. Obviously I'm not saying that is what would happen, just that that could be a possibility depending on the route you took to call forth these entities to test your theories.
Personally, I'd rather not deal with them any longer and so I wouldn't be going out to test any hypothesis, heh. I do think that some of them may be condensed energies of Fear that people have created just through their personal experiences with life. They could even be like black holes for Fear sucking in every bit of that emotion that it is near that were created from a sudden horrific terror here on the physical plane. Idk, but they're totally unattractive in my opinion, haha.
I actually don't think I'd have any problems with calling something like that with LDS people here. I've noticed that such things sometimes naturally seem to happen around them and they have no clue what is going on. Not those staying with me, but my wife was not always atheist/deist in nature. She at one time was LDS herself and has encountered these things on more than one occasion while she was LDS.
LDS does not mean free of fear. In fact, guilt combined with the religion can result in them being quite fearful. So if they did ever end up at my house again it'd likely be from her LDS parents without them realizing it. I'd be able to deal with it though.
I've found that LDS members generally attract otherworldly entities and occurences. I'm not too privy on their practices, but I've heard a little from a few friends who were practitioners at some point who all mentioned rituals that would deal with esoteric nature.
The cases I am aware of the people didn't do anything strange at their own house. That does not mean something didn't follow them home from a temple. They are secretive about what goes on inside of there. Though I know quite a bit of it and really it isn't as elaborate as people would think. Yet, you and I know it doesn't require anything elaborate just focused belief, guilt, fear, love, etc.