The Exchange (A Comedy Play)

Boy walks to the front door and draws in a deep breath. It has been a year since Gadalf evicted him. Following his recent job loss and inability to secure another job, he didn’t have any option than to ask Gadalf to take him back, at least for the meantime.

BOY: (Knocks)

MERCY: Who’s there?

BOY: (Surprised at hearing a female’s voice) A friend of Gadalf

MERCY: Oh (opens the door) Boy?

BOY: (Surprised) Mercy?

MERCY: What are you doing here?

BOY: I should be asking you that question.

MERCY: Could you leave this instant?

BOY: Why? Oh, I know. Gadalf doesn’t know what kind of a person you are.

MERCY: Oh damn it, Boy. You always ruin everything.

BOY: You mean Gadalf is on the list?

GADALF: (From afar) Who’s that at the door?

BOY: (Shouts) It’s me, Boy. I need to see you.

GADALF: (From afar) I can’t hear you. I will be out soon.

MERCY: (whispers) Oh God! Boy, what do you want?

BOY: (Walks in and sits on the sofa.) I actually came here to ask that Gadalf allow me crash here for a couple of days but given the er… (He looks at Mercy) …recent development, that might not be possible any more.

MERCY: Thank God you know. So are you going to leave now?

BOY: Yes. But first, I need some money.

MERCY: Jeez! Not again Boy. We have been through this. I am no longer subscribing to your blackmail.

BOY: Then tell Gadalf he’s boyfriend number three or whatever number he’s on…

MERCY: (Cuts in) Shut up. Argh! You’re impossible. I’ll get you some money. Just keep your bloody mouth shut. I look for a way to get some money across to you

GADALF: (Walks in) Sweetheart, here is the money for your mother’s treatment. (hands her a wad of dollar bills)

BOY: (Stands up at once)

MERCY: (Eyes popping) Wow! (Receives the money) Thank you. (Cries while counting the money) This is far more than I asked for (Jumps on him, locks him in a bear hug and kisses him full on the lips) I love you Gadalf.

GADALF: (Holding onto her while smiling) I love you too Mercy. (Notices Boy. Smile changes into a frown) Yes, what do you want?

BOY: Gadalf, I want to apologise for taking your money.…

GADALF: (Cuts in as he withdraws from Mercy’s embrace) Take? You bloody stole it

BOY: (Gulps) Yes, I stole the money. I’m sorry

GADALF: Hmm. What do you want?

BOY: I was thinking I could crash at your place for the meanwhile

GADALF: You say what? (Turns to Mercy) Sweetheart, look at this guy. I allowed him into my house and treated him as a friend and a brother. Do you know how he repaid me? He set me up and stole one bitcoin from me.

MERCY: (Tries to sound surprised) what? (She tucks the money into the back-pocket of her trouser) That’s awful

GADALF: Yes, it is. I pray you never have the misfortune of meeting people like this.

BOY: (Thinks for a while) I know that I wronged you. Could you kindly forgive me?

MERCY: Yes, dear, I think he’s sorry. Maybe you should just let it go.

GADALF: Hmm. It’s aright then. You’re lucky Mercy is pleading for you. It’s rare, you know. You should thank your stars. (Turns to Mercy) Or have you guys met before?

MERCY: (Shakes her head) No dear. Until this afternoon, I have never set my eyes on him

GADALF: Aright then. You're forgiven Boy. I’ve never been able to hold a grudge against you for long anyway. (Walks to the sofa and sits) However, you can no longer stay here. As you can possibly tell, Mercy, my new love, has moved in with me. Ah! Forgive my manners. Mercy meet Boy, my friend since secondary school. Boy, meet Mercy, the one who has been showing me so much love.

BOY: (Waves hand) Hi

MERCY: Hello

GADALF: Aright. If you don’t mind, I’ll like to enjoy my sweetheart’s company in private. Could you kindly excuse us?

BOY: Oh. It’s aright. Er… goodbye Gadalf. (He walks towards Gadalf, backs him and suddenly hugs Mercy) It was nice meeting you (Loud enough for Gadalf to hear as his right hand reaches to Mercy’s back-pocket).

GADALF: (Alarmed) What are you doing Boy? Get your hands off her!

BOY: (Leaves Mercy and begin to walk towards the door without turning back) I’m sorry. I just wanted to check if the goods are still in order. I’m out

MERCY: (Feels her back pocket and notices it is flat. Surprised) What?

GADALF: What is that?

MERCY: Oh, I was referring to what he said. You just sat there and watched him physically and verbally harass me.

GADALF: (Stands up.) Don’t worry, I will deal with it. (He walks out through the door)

MERCY: (Slumps on the chair and sighs) Oh God. Boy, I will kill you. (She mutters)

The end

This is my entry for the iPlay Contest by @jochi

I hope you enjoyed reading it

I’ve written two other plays about Boy. You can check them out

The Empty Pocket (A Comedy Play)

The Telephone Conversation (A Comedy)

Thanks for reading.

Blessings

[Image source: I edited a free to use picture from Pexels]