The Awful Waffle

I just recently did a post about "The Best Food I’ve Had In 8 Months” or rather "The Time I Waddled Out Of A Restaurant"

I guess this one is going to be about the worst food I’ve had. No waddling here, unfortunately.

Remember I said that if I complain about food, you should take it seriously? It’s true. I’ve got low standards when it comes to food.

My mom never taught me to be picky or to choose wisely. She just said "eat it" so I did. One time, I even remember dropping my sandwich in some pool water and my grandma made me eat it because I wasn't allowed to waste food!

So, yeah, I have low standards.

Luckily she taught me to have higher standards when it comes to dating, though, 😆.

I pretty much just like every food. Except for raw oysters and tarantula legs.

And maybe the waffles and iced coffee at Roti Canai in Canggu. Sorry that I’m about to name and shame them, but it just has to be done.

Sometimes I don’t want to write posts like this, because I don’t want to sound like a complainer.

I don’t want to BE a complainer.

But I don’t know if it’s complaining so much as it is just spreading awareness/ sharing the truth about my experiences so that maybe it can benefit others.

So, don’t read this post in a whiny tone because I’m not whining. Actually, if it amuses you, you could totally read this in a whiny voice. It might be entertaining. Maybe read it in a funny accent. 😆

Anyway, maybe I only have myself to blame for ordering waffles in a place that specializes in Roti.

That’s the one thing on their menu that I HOPE they’d be good at. I’d still give them one more chance to redeem themselves in the roti department. I just want so badly for some reason to believe that this restaurant is amazing.

I can only speak for myself, though. And for my friend, who agreed with me about the awful state that the waffle was in.

We had 2 different kinds of gluten-free waffles and iced coffee and all I have to say is: gross to all of it.

The iced coffee with coconut milk was so bad I actually had to ask to give it back because I think the milk was sour. I never ask that, because I hate conflict and I don’t want to hurt their feelings. But, I had to this time, and after she went to check the milk’s expiration date, she said I could have a refund. Yikes.

Also, it was more like chunky coconut cream than coconut milk and it didn’t blend with the coffee at all. It was just floating around in chunks in my drink. Bleh.

So as for the waffle. It LOOKED beautiful. It would make a GREAT instagram pic that would make people think that my life is ballin’ lol because I have fancy dragon fruit on my waffle:

But, remember, don’t believe everything you see on social media! You can’t taste my waffle through ig! Trust me, you weren’t missing out.

Let's just say I think they forgot to put "waffle so thick and dry you'll either choke on it or want to kill yourself" in the menu description.

I ordered a gluten-free coconut waffle with bananas, coconut syrup, dragon fruit and roasted cashews.

Well, there was hardly any syrup at all. The little bit that there was had no flavor. The waffle was undercooked on the inside, probably because it as so thick it could have never been cut in the middle.

You might want a thick booty so that rappers can sing about it in rap songs, but you definitely don’t want a thick waffle.

“I like thick waffles and I can not lie”- said no rapper ever.

It’s no good.

Then my friend had one with bacon and cheese inside. Oh my goodness. I tried it just to see if t was truly as bad as mine, and it was.

There was almost no bacon or cheese. Both waffles tasted the same. Just like thick, overly dry, heavy, bread.

It’s like they were sitting there and said “I have an idea. Let’s make a sweet waffle without any sweetness and let’s make a savory waffle without any savor.” 😆

I kind of felt sad that I wasted my cheat meal on food that tried to choke me to death with its dryness.

Not to mention also my money.

So, now ya know. If you try this place, just stick with the Roti ‘cause I’ve heard it’s good there. When I go back, I’ll try it for myself and verify if that’s true or not.

Remember, I have pretty low standards.

I will say the good about this place is it’s freaking cute and it makes you happy just to sit there.

Here’s what it looks like:

Also, there’s an adorable restaurant next door called Poke Poke that I haven’t gotten to try yet, either. But, there’s a door between the two so I slipped in and took some photos, which was fun and helped make up for the awful waffle a little.

Fine, okay, I'll share some with you. My mom taught me to share, too:

Love, @nomadicsoul