What's For Dinner? Recipe & Haiku👌

I know I'm awesome
Yummy get in my tummy
Yeah I can cook too

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First off let me say I love how good this picture turned out! It's like a god damned Jackson Pollock painting! I call it - The Food. Not totally serious but I'm thinking about blowing it up and put it on my fucking wall!

I took this picture with my Samsung Galaxy S9 Plus I got my first phone that had a camera around 2003. Pretty sure it was a Samsung v200. I'm too lazy to source an image so you can look it up. 😉 I was young and the cameras were so bad it was hard not to see the whole concept as a novelty - I loved TNG growing up and had reserved such things as nothing but a bunch of science fiction. As the technology improves I'm continually surprised with the quality of images phone cameras can produce.

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SO WHAT IS THIS MASTERPIECE? AND HOW DO YOU MAKE IT?

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IT'S A...... PASTA.... BAKE - I DONT KNKW WHAT IT IS I JUST MAKE NOM-NOM FOOD OK!

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INGREDIENTS

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• 3 CUPS BOWTIE PASTA
• ONE LARGE PORTOBELLO MUSHROOM
• ONE RED PEPPER
• ONE LARGE CHICKEN BREAST
• 1 JAR ALFREDO SAUCE
• 3/4 CUP CHEDDAR / MOZZARELLA MIX
• 1/3 CUP OF WATER (OPTIONAL)
• 1/3 CUP OF PARMESAN
• 1 or 2 tblsp SWEET CHILI SEASONING

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HOW TO COOK THIS BITCH

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• Set your oven to 420 - I'm Canadian you do the math.

• Butter a medium baking tray. Set it aside.

• Slice the pepper and mushroom. Set it aside.

• Dice the chicken - Fry that sum bitch up nice and crispy! - Set it aside.

• Cook the pasta for half its recommended time.

• Strain the bowties

• Dump pasta in buttered baking dish.

• Add the water.

• 1/2 Jar of Alfredo sauce over pasta.

• Arrange peppers and mushrooms in a pleasingly aesthetic way.

• Bless that mother fucker with that crispy chicken.

• Add rest of Alfredo's sauce.

• Shower the fucker with cheddar & mozzarella mix.

• Sprinkle PARMESAN over the yum-yum yum

• Don't forget to dust it with the sweet chilli powder. Don't you fucking dare forget the sweet chilli powder.

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COVER THE PAN IN TIN FOIL
POKE A SMALL HOLE IN THE CENTER
SHOVE THE TING IN DA OVEN
SET THE TIMER FOR 30 MINUTES
SMOKE A JOINT
OR
DRINK A BEER
YOU DESERVE IT
BECAUSE YOU'RE AWESOME!
WHY IN THE HELL DO I KEEP YELLING !!
🤪

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Give it a shot and let me know what you think!!
THAT'S ALL FOR NOW!!!!!!!!
E

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CHECK OUT SOME OF MY LATEST POSTS

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That Face You Make When....... A Haiku - Blogitty Bloggin
Quieting Voices - Sneak Peek - A Haiku & Some Bloggin
Created A Van Gogh While Playing with Deep Dream Generator - Blog & Challenge Announcement!

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Above Gif was created by @voronwe - Check out his page!!!