Part 29: Interlude - 4 (continued)

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in the snow cave

Dream of Pizza

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I ate the pizza. I thought about getting some work done in preparation for leaving the next morning. I thought about it and decided not to. Nope…we weren’t going anywhere till I woke up…if then. I might rest another day. The local idiots could burn for all I cared. It’d improve the gene pool. Think of it as evolution in action.

I fell asleep and dreamed of another pizza encounter.

In a different time. In a different place. Before the SHATTER. I drove a different truck. I called it Troglodyte too. I liked that name. It fit my personality. It was a W900B KW spec’d for heavy haul. I had left my trailer in the company yard while I BobTailed Trog over to The Pizza Ranch. It was early in the day so there were hardly any cars in the parking lot. Good....I needed all the room I could get. I managed to park and then I walked inside. I noticed that all of the ‘staff” seemed to be teenage girls.

Interesting....and very easy on the eyes. I proceeded to order a pizza....and discovered that pretty girls can be very hard to deal with.

“Good morning “ the little girl behind the cash register said “can I help you?”

She didn’t want to help me. I could tell. She kept looking back at her friends with sad eyes. They were having a conversation and she was missing out on all the gossip.

“Yup I’d like a pizza. I want a large Meat Lover’s with Alfredo sauce, an order of chicken fries on the side and a one liter bottle of mountain dew.”

“Oh” she says “ we don’t have one liter bottles”.

“That’s ok I’ll take two half liter bottles” I said (duh!)

“...and we don’t have Mountain Dew” she replied primly.

“That’s ok. I’ll take what you got.” I said.

She seems stunned....almost shocked.....then she frowns and says”...I don’t think I’ve ever heard of “WhuttChewGawt”...and I’m sure we don’t have any”

I winced and looked at her...she frowned and looked at me.......language problems. Happens all the time when I get north of the Mason Dixon. DamnYankees can’t understand plain language.

I continued.

“Well how about Coke. Ya’ll got any coke?” I asked.

“We only have Pepsi products” the young lady said righteously.

“Coke...Pepsi...same thing...just like Democrats and Republicans....Gimme two half liter bottles of Diet Pepsi” I looked at her carefully. Was that too difficult?

Nope...The Soda Pop dilemma was a challenge...but she overcame....and now for the hard part...the actual order.

PIZZA!

“What do you want?” she asked.

” I want a large meat lover’s, with Alfredo Sauce” I repeated.

“Meat lover’s …. what size?” she asked.

“Large” I told her…again.

“What type of sauce?” she asked.

“Alfredo” I told her…again.

She looked at me...frowning slightly. Something is just not right...she can sense it.

“Anything else?” she managed.

“An order of chicken Fries” I told her…again.

Mission accomplished…she was a happy camper. “Your order will be ready in about fifteen minutes.”

“Good” I told her...”I’ll just wait right here” I pointed toward a bench in the lobby. “where it’s warm.”

“I need a telephone number so that I can call you when your pizza is ready” the voice of authority recites... calm and deadly.

“I’ll just be sitting right here” I was taken aback slightly. ...”right on that bench”.

“I’m sorry” drumming her fingers on the computer board....”The computer needs a phone number....”

“I guess there’s no arguing with a computer is there? 1-800-555-1212” I said....quickly and calmly. I carefully maintained eye contact.

“Thank you “she said....”and your name is?”

“Barack”...I say....backing carefully away.”..if this gal had a mind she wouldn’t know what to do with it, such people can be dangerous.

She grins, more in puzzlement than in happiness.....”thank you Barack.” Something was just NOT right…she couldn’t put her finger on it though.
.
About twenty minutes later I was still sitting on the bench in the nice WARM lobby. I wasn’t in any hurry at all. It was COLD outside. I’ve found some magazines that aren’t much older than I was and I was skimming them. The little girl walked up to the register....she had a “to-go order.”

My pizza. She looks at me and smiles....
…...........and then she dials the phone.

She then frowns at the phone as I walk up to her.

“Your phone acts funny” she says as I took the Pizza.

I have no idea what to say to her. The lights are on..but no one is home. I carefully took my meal and left the building.

I took my pizza out to Troglodyte and climbed in. I really wished I had a beer, but I didn’t. Getting a beer when driving a big truck was SUCH a hassle. Illegal too so I didn’t bother. I bobtailed back to the yard and found a good spot to park. I got out in the ice and snow again and plugged my extension cord into shore power. The electric heater in the truck would keep me warm now without having to burn diesel to idle.

I got back into the truck. There was a cat sitting in the passenger seat. This was new.

“Hi kitty. Where did YOU come from? How’d you get in here?” I asked the cat.

It’s was a pretty kitty. All black. I looked at it closer and noticed that it was a really, really STRANGE looking kitty. It’s arms and legs are all wrong for a cat. It looked more like a cat woman.

A woman. Really. VERY obviously a female.

Eye Candy.

She looks at me right in the eye and said
“My name isn’t kitty. It’s Gretchen.”

I looked at her. Pretty kitty. “Where’d you come from?”

“I come from the Stars.” the pretty kitty bragged.

“Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin,'
I thought
`but a grin without a cat!
It's the most curious thing I ever saw in my life!’

I slept….

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To Be Continued
The Next Episode is
Part 30 - Interlude -4 (concluded)…
The Last episode was
Part 28: Interlude - 4…
the first episode was
Part 1 : Winter Storm

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