The Huge Price Children Pay For Being In Foster Care.. Many For The Rest Of Their Life...........
Here is a picture of me and my step mother when she brought me to my high school ceremony. It was a day that we thought was never going to happen.
Many of you know that I was a foster child. Well the first foster home I was in the lady hit me so I left that foster home and decided that I would not stay in another one. Well there was a consequence with my decision that would last me the rest of my life. That one decision caused me to never go back to school. Well at least until I was 18. When I was ripped from my family I was in the start of the 8 grade. There were short periods of time while I was in detention or the hospital that I did attend the school that was there. But these were usually only for a few hours a day and in a small room that usually provided little to no real education while I was there. Because of the time that I was living in it was not as common to home school your children as it is now, so it was not normal to see children even teenagers walking around outside during school hours. So if I was not hiding out in a friends house I could be found at the library. I loved to read and the library was the perfect place for me. It was quiet, it was cool, I lived in Florida where temperatures got really hot at times and humidity only made it hotter. So the education that I had was different from my peers and I found that the information was also different. The information given in the school text books was censored and most of the time bias compared to the information I was reading at the library. Up until I was ripped from my life my path was parallel with my peers as far as how I was informed of the history of our world and nation. When I was separated and forced to learn the information on my own I no longer was thinking the way my peers were thinking. That is when I started to realize just how badly we as a society are being controlled. But that is a topic for another day.
Well I did go back to school and I had no issues with it. Once I turned 18 I was eligible for this program called fast track. With this program I was going to get my high school diploma and it took me 2 years instead of 4. Being that I spent so much of my time reading I had no issues passing the tests. I only needed to focus on getting the credits I needed. So I spent 2 years getting the 24 credits I needed. The classes were done at my pace as everyone in this school was working on what they needed and the teacher was there only to assist if you needed the help. Once I got the credits I needed I was given the 2 tests that they wanted me to take. Yes one was a GED test, the other one was similar but was called something different. I think it was HSCT but I do not remember. And than I took my ASVAP. I scored really high on all 3 tests, but medical issues that I was not aware of kept me out of the military. During a routine exam I was told I had PID and would never have children. PID was an automatic issue that kept me from going into the military. I thought for the next 8 years I could not have children. But a car accident changed all that. Yes a story for another day as well. LOL
Well back to education, When I was finished with these tests I was given my high school diploma.
So you may think that my story is unique, well I am saddened to inform that many foster children leave school to NEVER return. So in a sense I beat the odds and went back to school and finished. I did this because I had a goal, even though my goal was never achieved, It was still a day that both me and my step mother were very pleased happened. This was one of the few times in my life that she was proud of me. And one of the memories I still cherish from her.
I just told you that foster children dropping out is a crisis but it should also be considered a crime against children as it steals their future.
Did you know that every move a child makes to a different foster home that it sets them back 6 months in their education?
Did you know that many children are moved an average of 4 times each year?
No wonder they are so more likely to drop out.
The following link can give you more information https://www.nfyi.org/issues/education/
But here is some of the main information on that site
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Why is this the case?
Well the answer is simple but it takes an understanding of how a child feels and understands the world around them. You see when I finished my high school I decided that I wanted to go into early childhood education. So I took some classes and got my home day care license. During the time I was taking classes which was about a year I worked in a day care. I than ran my home day care for 2 years when I decided that I wanted to become a foster parent. Our family went down the journey of being a foster home for almost 2 years before turning in our license.
I found that children need not only stability and love, they needed consistency to thrive. When they are moved from one family to another they loose that feeling of being safe and it shatters their core. This is why even when small children spend a short time in foster care and they are returned to their family they are never the same. They are a shell of their former selves and many need long term care because of their time "in care".
The longer they are in care the more times they are moved the worse this gets for them. This is why a few years ago many states decided that cases needed to be fast tracked within the system and as you can read from my previous posts that the average time in care in many cases is less than 1 year before a child is adopted. If you have not had the chance to read it please do so. As it explains the motivation of CPS in more detail.
This link is of that post https://steemit.com/familyprotection/@curlfamilyvlog/only-reason-was-child-was-adoptable
There is no easy answer for this. But I feel that the starting point should be by holding CPS accountable to why each child is removed. I understand there are real cases out there that the child needs to be removed. As seen in the above link the percentage of children removed from their family do to abuse is 16%. These cases are from physical and sexual abuse. However the majority of cases are from Neglect with a very high 61% of cases. The issue with this is the term "Neglect" is becoming more and more used to CONTROL parents and force them to do things they are otherwise not willing to do. This has been used by the medical field to force parents into vaccinating their children, or doing procedures on their children that they do not feel is needed or from even getting a second or third opinion.
More recently the home school community have been targeted and now the use of educational neglect has been heard for cases. But I must ask if a parent chooses to home school their child and they are held under education neglect, WHY is CPS not held to the same NEGLECT?
It has been shown that more than half of foster children DROP OUT. Yet many are better educated by their parents than they would be at school.
So what can be done? I feel that the term Neglect is widely used and it needs to be removed from the agencies vocabulary of terms. Yes there are people that abuse and hurt their children but as you can see those numbers are small compared to the wide use of neglect. If this term is removed than the agencies can better focus on the children that are at risk of injury or death. Which is what the agency was initially created to do.
This is just the beginning of my story and the information that I have. If you wish to hear more please consider following. And upvoting and resteem this. The more people that know about the ways CPS uses to steal children the less likely they are to get away with it. And one day we will be strong enough to put a stop to their tyranny.
As I fully support the #familyprotection movement 25% of ALL the SBD generated for this post will be transferred to #familyprotection. The other 25% WILL BE USED TO BUY MORE Steem Power. So my voting power will go up. The last 50% will sit in my account until someone needs it, I need it or I will use it to buy even more Steem Power.
As always Thank you for taking the time to read this post. It means the world to me to finally have a place where I can speak openly and without fear or repercussion.
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thank you
You are so right, that CPS has a double standard.
They say that homeschooling is neglect, YET half of their foster children will drop out of school anyways!
I had not put that piece of the puzzle together before ... so Thank-You @curlfamilyvlog !
thank you
I agree she puts a piece of the puzzle together here, but when shown she's wrong why does she ignores it hoping it goes away. I think that's dangerous and detrimental to those you plan on helping. The problem is a lot deeper than the CPS, surely understanding this will benefit everyone?
I don't understand why you keep hounding @curlfamilyvlog. I had already read your interactions with her a while back and privately messaged her not to let your rudeness get to her.
She is a busy homeschooling mom, who is also a former foster child and a former foster parent, and therefore has first-hand experience with CPS-related issues. The @familyprotection account resteems and encourages stories like hers.
She had responded to mindhawk when he asked her to look into a particular case. She decided to take time out of her busy schedule and spend hours investigating the information that she was able to find online, and relayed her impression of what it all meant. She did not need to take this time to respond to him but she did. She is not claiming to be any sort of expert, and the fact that you found a different conclusion than her does not give you the right to abuse her as you have been.
Why would it be "dangerous and detrimental" to anyone for her to have a different opinion than you and mindhawk? You are expecting way too much of her and I don't know why.
p.s. mindhawk seems to think that @familyprotection is some huge organization that can travel around the world looking for families to help with CPS issues. He is absolutely wrong. 2 bloggers (myself and @markwhittam) started the account to share these stories from people just like @curlfamilyvlog. We have lots of people right here on Steemit undergoing issues with them who need help, but we do not yet have much Steem or other cryptocurrencies saved up to help even the people who have been sharing their stories first-hand and live with us. Plus any financial help that we would provide would be in the form of Steem and cryptos, not $US or any other fiat. So for you and mindhawk to demand that we thoroughly investigate a CPS case of someone not on Steemit, when we have no ability to help anyways is presumptive.
I'm sorry if i came across abusive as this was never my intention, so again i apologise. My concern is also with those families that have nowhere to go when fighting the likes of the CPS to keep their children. We all have busy lives and spend whatever spare time we have doing our research.
Why i'm so frustrated is the case she looked at is more important to family protection than you realise. I don't agree with what she wrote and tried pointing out CPS is not the main threat and helping families in the courts is a battle you can not win. The Handrahan case exposes everything the government is capable of and to what lengths they will go if required. This in my opinion is crucial to understand when going up against the system.
''Why would it be "dangerous and detrimental" to anyone for her to have a different opinion than you''. My opinion is irrelevant, all that counts are the facts. When shown there is more to this story than it seems, curlfamilyvog said research was what she was good at and would look into this further. All those involved with family protection naturally form the same opinion after her research, that's why it's so important all information shared is correct. Have you read my comment from 4-5 days ago? I think if you do you might understand where i'm coming from and why i can't stress enough how important it is that your group looks at this case. If you still believe there is nothing to look at i'm happy not to bother you again. If you are interesting in finding out more i am more than happy to help. As i said before my concern is with the families, plus i don't have the spare time to join any group.
You said:
I already told you that you are expecting too much out of her and I tried to explain how @familyprotection works. But you still think that whatever opinion she forms automatically becomes our opinion??!! That is RIDICULOUS! She writes articles using our tag and has experience within the system that we can all glean from. But we all form our own opinions. I sure hope that you understand that this time and that I do not have to repeat myself yet again.
Just so you know, I do not fully agree with all her suggestions in the original post that you commented on (before this post). @familyprotection resteems articles that are on topic, even if we have minor disagreements with them. Steemit and @familyprotection is a place for discussion and brainstorming.
We do not claim to have all the answers. If you think that you have some answers you can write a post about it and maybe people will discuss your ideas and counter with their own ideas.
The main thing that @familyprotection does is share people's experiences with the system so that we can all learn from it.
If you read my last post, you will see that I think the biggest contribution we can make is to teach people how to avoid trouble in the first place -- DO NOT LET THEM IN YOUR HOME WITHOUT A COURT ORDER!
https://steemit.com/familyprotection/@canadian-coconut/finding-a-lawyer-to-fight-cps-and-defend-your-rights
People are too trusting and think that CPS is there to help. @familyprotection is helping to dispel that myth.
Once they have already gotten into your home and started to interrogate your children and you, there is not a lot that we can do. We could hire good lawyers but that sucks up a lot of money and even when you get a win in court it is really a loss, because the whole family has already been extremely traumatized by being separated during the long drawn-out proceedings.
@canadian-coconut mam, i'm new this steemit from Bangladesh.
See my #introduceyourself and support me this platform.
I was wondering if you planned on replying to my concerns pointed out in my last post?
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friend I always like to read your story because it talks about overcoming despite having been subjected to these situations, including abuse, shelters and more, currently you have your family and you are a good person
Thank you. This is why I have chosen to tell my story as well as giving the statistics I give
Good story. Really touching.
thank you
I knew of a woman also who had multiple venereal diseases that caused her to have PID, they told her also she would never have children but later in life she did go on to have three children so I doubt it when they tell people these things sometimes.
I had a different experience then you concerning foster care. Foster care wasn't a piece of cake but when I went into foster care in the fifth grade I couldn't even read. My parents were both illiterate. My foster father had a sister who was a school teacher and she came over twice a week after school and taught me how to read and spell, in that years time I spent there I became a book worm, especially Nancy Drew books, I just couldn't get enough books to read, I loved it. After I left foster care I never lost that love of books, I would go on to be listed in junior high on the Principles Academics for Excellence Award several times, had a high point grade average and became the front page editor of our junior high school newspaper. Unfortunately my mom went back to her old habits of drinking and abusing and by the time I was sixteen I ran away to escape the abuse which I meant I had also dropped out of school. I stayed on the run until I was almost seventeen. A month before my seventeenth birthday there was a court hearing and I decided to attend. I went there and the judge said to me that it looked to him like I had taken very well care of myself and that if I went home until I turned seventeen he would grant that I be given a proclamation of emancipation, meaning I no longer would require custodianship by a parent. After awhile I found a program that through the federal government that paid while they were learning a skill. I choose to go to a local college program for clerical training. I couldn't get college credits but I could get high school credits. I ended up with four more credits in English then I needed to graduate but needed two more math credits which I got though a high school program offered at a school across from the college, I ended up graduating with a full high school diploma through that high school that year even though I only took two math programs there during the evening. I graduated the same year I would have graduated if I had stayed in high school. There will be some things I will forever be grateful for for being in foster care and teaching me to read and write is one of them.
It is great that you had a good experience in care. I can honestly say that I wish I heard more stories like yours where care was good for them. Maybe people would feel different. It seems like you had really good foster parents that truly loved helping. The sad thing is many are not in it to help. They see the children as nothing more than a pay check.
It's a mixed bag experience. There were things my foster mom did that I didn't appreciated like hounding me about my weight because I was a bit on the heavy side, we also fought over my hair, she was always wanting to cut it, and slapping me in the face one time because I told her I didn't have to play with her kids one day when the neighbor girl and I were playing and we didn't want them to play with us, she apologized but still it was rather stinging. Overall though they were good people, whereas some of the foster homes my brothers and sisters had weren't that great. I am going to write stories on them in the future, it's just hard to get motivated when it really isn't worth the time spent writing them. Then this site is all focused on the negative aspects of foster care they don't want to acknowledge any of the positives because it doesn't fit the agenda of hate. Personally I think this site would be better off with someone running it that could be impartial. I ask myself why do I want to write more about the overburden foster system due to the opioid epidemic and how it's straining the system while also causing the system to expand into area's once not considered problematic or about the foster care parents who have banded together and why they are fighting the system also or any number of the stories I could do on my own family experiences when someone with a bias agenda won't do those stories any justice....the foster care system isn't just about her and her feelings.
Thoese double standards .. they have lots of them .. :( thanks for sharing!!
thank you
I like it a lot when he tells us a little about his story, because it shows how a person with all that he has ever lived can be overcome and be a good person
thank you for your comment. It helps me more than I can ever tell you just by telling my story.
This post was upvoted and resteemed by #thethreehugs. Thank you for your support of @familyprotection.
You will find my active post here: #thethreehugs
Thank you
You are most welcome.
Thank you for the post..i can empathize with you as i was in care as a child. And it absolutely ruined 40 years of my life, so i know what you mean. Social services talked by mother who was uneducated into letting them care for me and educate me as i was very bright. What really happened was that i was sexually, psychologically and physically abused. So i did the only thing i could and ran away and stole to feed myself. Eventually i was put in ever more secure homes so escape was no longer an option. So i became violent as a means to protect myself. It saddens me to say that i knew they would pick on quieter boys. How bad is that? I still live with the guilt to this day.
I get what you are saying about the term "neglect". They use this term to justify their intrusion into working class families. In a lot of cases they just don't want children to be raised with traditional working class values of family. Like you mention, they use all these terms to enforce their political will on families. That may be vaccination, schooling etc etc.
this is all part of a wider assault on working class communities and often christian values. At the same time other fundamental religious communities, not indigenous to the UK, are given free rein to bring up their children and educate them to "hate" the culture they are living in. This has huge implications for future generations.
Thank you for your post. It was at times heartbreaking but truly inspirational. Having this platform to articulate our pain is a great way forward...
Have a great day and congratulations on the education..
Thank you for your comment. I am finding that more and more people share this path. So yes I am very thankful to have found this platform. Just talking (well typing) my story and sharing it here has helped me in more ways than I can explain.
Me too. it's amazing isn't it..I'm glad that like me talking about something that i have lived with for years is truly liberating. Hope you have a good day..God bless..