Punday Monday 69. Nothing funny about that number. Just keep walking. Comedy open mic round 34
Welcome to Punday Monday!
If you’re new here, pull up a stool, order a pun-t, and get to know some of the regulars! I’m your puntender, @improv.
You can jump in any time, and if you aren’t sure how to make a pun, here’s a handy dandy guide:
https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties
If you’re an oldtimer, welcome back! Get to know some of the whippersnappers, here, we have a special mixed drink for you on the house:
(Where and what is the fashion show? Oh, it’s pretty clothes.)
And since you’re an oldtimer, you might be interested in the results of our first annual best pun contest:
https://steemit.com/contest/@freewritehouse/punday-monday-year-one-day-awards-ceremony
If you’re an any-timer, old or whipper, make sure you visit @freewritehouse! There you can meet fellow lovers of goofiness and find even more contests every week! We’re also now featured in the @steembasicincome contest round-up! Find more opportunities to win SBI there!
Hang on to your punderwear...
There’s no business like show business, so let’s show you the business we’re dealing with today!
Here’s last week’s post, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!
Rookie of the Week
Welcome @steemmonstershow! (though I suspect you’re @littlescribe, too. NO MATTER. YOU WIN!)
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Pocket Choice awards
Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here:
https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/pocket-friday-as1d6gli
This week’s winner will win a #steembasicincome share, courtesy of @freedomshift and #ccc. He sponsors an SBI award for our #ccc qualified contest posts, and he asked me to post this:
This is an Invitation to join #ccc for Guaranteed Daily Income and Payout for Newbies (2.0) in #ccc and Follow the Honor Code - the Creed (Conditions and Limits Inside)
AND
the latest update <<< please click to read.
And 2 more SBI shares from the @improv account, thanks to our sponsorship by @curie!
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(sic...he means, “too bad” ;P )
@coinsandchains won because @paul.atreides’ chose him! You could be choosing these winners! Check out the feed every Friday to find out how! You can get some POCKET to vote with, easy peasy! @paul.atreides has accepted his task! If you want to vote on your favorite pun, but you don’t have any POCKET to do it with, he’ll send you some. Just ask in a memo or message!
The folks in the POCKET Choice winner's circle Season One were are @aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.
Season Two POCKET Choice Winner’s Circle:
@ablaze, @coinsandchains
and our grand prize…
The prize for best pun
Best pun of the entire week
Best Overall Pun
DRUMROLL, PLEASE
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One of the reasons it’s so good is that it’s TRUE! The anniversary DID fall on Wednesday!
Thanks for helping me celebrate!
And what prizes do they win, you ask?
Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions. (WORTH $0.02! So much value!)
Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote -let me know in a comment here- and a @tipu tip!
And they all get big, exciting SBI prizes!
(@coinsandchains, you’ll get your one more SBI for the POCKET Choice award from @freedomshift!)
This week's pun topic is...
Monsters!
As in,
When my son is upset, and mummy is out with her fiends at one of their old haunts, who comforts him?
Deady.
Perfect,
I'm so good at puns....
If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!
Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge? This past week’s winners, @paul.atreides, @steemmonstershow, and @coinsandchains...
And, as long as I have your attention… well, this place is already saturated with people who have referral codes for various “free money” things, but here are mine!
Coinbase: Cryptocurrency investment- https://www.coinbase.com/join/5929c0788331aa072d9e347e
(Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know. - I learned from someone else that buying LTC and sending it to bittrex then trading it for BTC then trading that for STEEM is the least-fees way. Can someone confirm?)
Robinhood: investment platform buying/selling stocks- http://share.robinhood.com/brendaw92
Earn.com: small tasks for small rewards (need a business or .edu email) - http://earn.com/improv/referral/?a=qmk07e7tzua677hk
Mannabase: sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency- https://www.mannabase.com/?ref=3984bea863
Swift: Yet another attempt at a UBI: https://www.swiftdemand.com/?referred_by=lochleinn
Hi improv,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)
Judges:
If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
The other night, I got home late from going out with friends. And as I walked up the steps of my house, I realized I didn't have my jacket with me. I monster left it at the karaoke place.
Maybe you Monster drink less too.
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In case of a zombie apocalypse here's three thing to never as a zombie.
What for dinner?
Can you give me a hand?
What are you thinking?
What's for dinner? Well if you are close enough to ask it's usually you...
Can you give me a hand? He might actually give you his, or someone else's.
What are you thinking? It's never much, it bounces between Food and the theme song from Frozen(I'm pretty sure it's what caused this mess in the first place.)
Now that's a new one on me. A @gentlebot upvote? That appears to be rather random?...
Not complaining just curious.
Not random. I love @gentlebot. It tries to guess via AI what comments will get upvoted.
Oh boy!
Hey, there's a Chibera story thought for you... Mana reanimated corpses... the could even be controlled by whomever controls some object or the special dark mana crystals that created them. Those dark crystals could even have something to do with the dark elves...
ZOMG
Trump is in my town today and I just heard that he is staying an extra night....who says the Great Pumpkin never shows up around Halloween?
Why was the horseman frustrated after his date? He was headless.
Or it could have been that he was riding on a night mare, then his date turned into one...
Nice one! You're KRAKEN me up.
I Arrakeen you Dune know what I'm going to say next. Unless you really are Muad’Dib, then we all be in trouble.
You got me, not sure I can WORM my way out of this one.
The. Best.
Good curation.
Ooooo
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Perfect for Punday Monday 69! It's freea k omedy, but still I thing you deserve a reward.
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HA
But he was boring. It's normal that she would be Sleepy Hollow long the date.
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Another glorious Punday Monday victory, thank you, thank you! So many good puns already this week and it is only Tuesday. It's going to be hard to determine which one is BEAST.
Cool, thanks guys. I guess you need monster puns
Yes, and puns that are intense. It's gotta be(h)emot(h) ional!
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Did you hear about the creature that emerged from the deli after the radioactive chemical spill? Apparently, it was a real scary MUENSTER.
What did they tell Beowulf when he complained about having to schlep off to the boondocks to slay another monster......"Just GRENDEL and bear it and you'll be a GEAT hero."
There was a vicious rumour going around Oktoberfest about a monster on the loose. But it was just our mate Frank with his beer - Yep good old Frank-and-Stein.
I think this monster was already punned about this week in HEROIC fashion but I won't BANSHEE you for trying, besides, who doesn't love Octoberfest. :-)
I know!! I hadn't read his comment YETI when I posted mine. The LOCHNESS is uncanny between our monster posts though. I guess great minds think alike and there's nothing KING KONG with that..
I enjoyed the PUNgent nature of your FRANKINCENSE, good job!