Pun Day Monday #8 (with week #7 winner announcement!)
Before we get to the serious business
Of choosing a best joke, the results of the naming of the posts.
Monday Punday: 1
Pun Day Monday (not on the list, but we'll count it, 'cause it's an error on my part that I didn't think of it!): 1
That's a tie.
So this week there are only those two options.
Vote with your pun for this week.
Here's a picture
So that the post will have something visually interesting to draw folks in:
On with the punning!
There must be something in the air! So many more entrants than ever before! Let's look at all the puns!
I want to give
the biggest ups to @miniature-tiger for teaching me that a category of food that includes lentils is called "pulses". With that knowledge, this pun is easily in the top 5.
I want to give
@marcovanhassel big props for making me do a double-take with his seemingly sincere question that turned out to be a delayed reaction laugh out loud pun. One of my favorite kinds, which puts this one easily in the top 5.
I want to give
@stinapederson whoop whoops for coming up with the most convoluted set up for one of the most sideways punchlines it has ever been my pleasure to experience. She continues to prove she knows her audience. Easily top 5.
I want to give
@paul.atreides snaps for providing 4 solid puns, all of which combined are easily one top 5 entry.
I want to give
@xyzashu a knife and toast for buttering me up with a snarky movie snob, and triggering a memory of one of my favorite standup bits ever. Easily top 5.
I want to give
@doctorcrypto pictures of puppies and kittens for doing what @stinawog did WITH AN ACCENT. The only think that would have made it better is if there was a video, so we could HEAR the accent.
What? That's six?
You don't say. Well then, we'll just say the winner wasn't in the top 5, k? It's a separate category.
That doesn't make sense?
But what does, anymore, really?
Lots of things?
...
...
...
The winner, with plenty of ...
Oh dang. I just reread them.
They're all so good.
The winner is
ACH! I'm having trouble. See, the thing is, these all deserve to win. Well, not all of them, but I won't call out the ones that don't. There are at least ... 5, for real, that I want to win... so then it crosses my mind that I should spread out the wins to folks who haven't ever won, but then I think, "NO, dangit, the contest is sacrosanct." It cannot be influenced by anything other than the pun's punniness. But then I'm like THEY'RE EQUAL, so USE OTHER INFORMATION.
NO!
I shall resist.
Dangit, ya'll
Maybe I can still turn this into a lesson. Throw everything at the wall and see what sticks. The winner and still champion is @paul.atreides for his joke:
Why?
- He
Hang on, we interrupt this post to give you exciting news from a text message. I just won a Best Actor award from a film festival in Scotland. Stay tuned. - He had both a long and convoluted set-up, and then delivered a devastating pun pun.
That's not a great explanation.
You know, you're right. Go here if you want to learn how to make your own puns: https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties
This week's subject is...
As in "Why was the train such a good DJ? Because if the party wasn't feeling it, she could always smoothly switch tracks."
BOOM. YOU BEEN PUNNED.
Proceed.
Oh shoot, I almost forgot to mention. The prize that you've all gotten is an upvote from me on your pun. Furthermore, though no one's claimed it in a while, is you, @paul.atreides, get to share with me one of your posts, and I will probably upvote it. I won't if it's full of evilness, but I don't expect that from anyone who can make good jokes.
What do trains and coke addicts have in common? They do big rails.
Nice one! I prefer Pepsi, but did your hear what Coke said after he tasted this week's word? "Ain't nothin' like the rail thing, baby!"
Another week, another pun challenge!
If I were to make a pun about a monorail, It would have to be a one liner.
Let me try, what do you call a train full of passengers infected with the Epstein-Barr virus?
No clue?!
I think you can come up with the answer yourself and my apologies if I made you think RAIL hard. :-)
Ok, just a quick clarification, my response was intended to be an addition to my own comment and not as a snarky response to Dr. Crypto's good-natured "No clue" comment. Dr. Crypto is brillant and was just playing the perfect straight-man to my question. I know he knows the answer, can someone else help us out and deliver the punfully painful punchline?
I dunno, but they should get off the St.(d)
Fuck you atreides! what with your snarky responses...
Oh...... I just read the rest. ..
Mono indeed my friend.
Mono
Nicely done, discreet but insightful.
Nice!
Yay for encouragement!
Where's your stormy pun? Are you feeling under the weather?
Pun Day Mon Day needs more punnage. Don't lose STEEM!
I've never been good with railway jokes. I guess I need to get into training.
You ready?
I recently had a job interview down at the rail yard. It went really well.
Throughout the whole interview I stayed on track, was proficient with their computer platform, didn't try to rise above my station, and now they just have to submit a ticket to the hire ups and give me the signal.
It was a long interview... boy is my caboose tired.
OOO... time to check out the new week's post!
My vote is for Pun Day Monday. I don't just like the sound of it, I RAIL-ly love it!
It's time...
What did the jockey say after he fell I love with this week's random word? I love to hug the rail!
Why did the doctor place this week's word on antibiotics and a special diet? She heard rales in its lungs and it was as thin as a rail.
First of all let me be the first to wish everyone a happy "No Sun Day Pun Day Monday." Second of all, Brendan, with all the excitement surrounding today's big event please do not feel guilty about leaving us all in the dark in regards to last week's winner until Tuesday. I promise I will not rail on you for doing so, in fact, I would hate for the crowning of this week's new champion to eclipse any of the excitement surrounding heavenly events at hand.
Aaaaaaaa
What happens when you visit the eye doctor at the Seattle Center after staring at a solar eclipse with just one eye? You get monocle-railed!
you card
Congratulations on your best actor award! What is the film and where can we see it? If I had known that this was being read by a movie star I promise you I would have spent a lot more time on this stuff. 🙂
Send me a message on steemit.chat, and I'll send you to the private link. It's not available online to the public, yet, but for such a devoted punster, I can share it.
Done 💂🏻
Done.