My First Bad Experience with Steemit

in #steemit8 years ago

The only thing stronger than my desire to see these ridiculous accusations disappear is my desire to defend myself and tell whoever is interested the real truth.

Apparently there is a man in Peru who is insanely jealous that I was interviewed with @dollarvigilante. This man is claiming that I blew off an appointment to be interviewed by him for a TV audience consisting of millions of viewers.

This man is @fyrstikken and he is a liar.

I never made an appointment with him. I’ve confronted him and asked him to provide proof that this appointment even existed.

He has yet to provide the proof because it does not exist.

The first time I’ve ever communicated with this man was on steemit.chat when I provided a link for one of my posts featuring a future trip to Peru on the post-promotion chat room. He contacted me and said he wanted to meet me. That was it. He said it “would be great to have two steemit users meet in person”. Never once did he EVER inform me that he had planned to hire a camera crew to accompany this meeting. He never even mentioned interviewing me, let alone planning on airing this “interview” on a television station in Peru.

Please, let’s look at the logic of this. To my knowledge at this point there was a man in Peru who wanted to meet me. He knew I would be traveling alone. I’d never spoken to him or knew anything about him until this first time he’d reached out to me. I never gave him the specific dates that I would be in Lima. How could there be an “appointment” if he never knew when for sure I would be in town? He also claims to have spoiled his reputation for having to reserve 4 tables at a swanky restaurant… once again, I never told him for sure when I would be in Lima, let alone give him a specific time of day. For him to be able to make a reservation is just preposterous.

Instead I made the decision to spend my time in Lima meeting with a young woman working with the children in Huaycan Peru because I wanted to shed a light on the hard work she and the volunteers do there. If you'd like to learn more about her Light and Leadership Initiative check it out here! All proceeds are donated to their efforts of furthering the education of the children, teens and women of Huaycan.

I never reached out to him because there was never a set plan and since I never heard from him again in the two weeks since he first contacted me I figured that we wouldn’t be meeting after all.

He never contacted me again after this first conversation on the steemit.chat post-promotion page until one day last week he decided to make me his next steemit user to target. Rumor has it he has also been a problem for other well known steemit users like @stellabelle and @tuck-fheman. He was so abusive towards @stellabelle that it’s made her seriously consider taking her creative posts to Synereo. I myself am a huge fan of hers and would be sad to see her switch to Synereo due to her experience with this loose cannon.

It wasn’t until after my interview with @dollarvigilante was released that he began his mission to ruin my reputation and even went as far as to tell people that I’m a fake blogger and my blog is a scam. I assure it is not. All of the photos and my writing are completely genuine and original works written specifically for the users of steemit. Don’t believe me? Check them yourself.

I met with @dollarvigilante because I have followed him on YouTube for a long time now and I credit him for educating me about many things regarding the government and how to invest wisely. I was so excited to have been asked by him for an interview- an interview he explicitly explained would be aired on his Anarchast channel on YouTube. I knew who this man was before he approached me and I was able to have a friend of mine accompany me to this interview- which would not have been the case in Peru. I would have been meeting with a complete stranger all by myself in a foreign country- not exactly the smartest way for a woman to travel. I want to thank @dollarvigilante for being an incredible help to me and proving to be a real friend.

I’m in Cape Town right now where wifi is hard to come by so I was unaware of this libelous post until today. I was able to read the comments and saw how he defended me and I’m very thankful for that.

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(I've been a bit busy climbing mountains lately)

Don’t mistake my silence as a sign of guilt

I really was hoping that the recent experience in that chat room would be the end of this mess, I figured he’d get it all off his chest and move on. I guess I was wrong, he decided to spread the lies further and see if he could get paid for it. Which apparently ruining others reputations is a phenomenal way to make money on this site. Too bad I have a conscious and wouldn’t be able to actively ruin people’s reputations, get paid for it AND be able to sleep at night.

I’m guessing @fyrstikken was jealous that he didn’t get to use my popularity on this site to further promote his own ambitions. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s awesome that he has been promoting steemit so well in Peru and I would’ve loved to have helped him do so by meeting with him and doing an interview. But again I was never informed by him of any such plans for a TV interview! Unfortunately for me, since he couldn’t use my popularity for the good of steemit, he’s now using it to make money off of a completely false yet sensationalized story that he has fabricated. He has published libelous statements and has made more than $1000 off of it to boot.

The language he used to completely berate me on the public chat room was nothing short of disgusting behavior. I hope he’s embarrassed by the language he chose to express himself, especially if he’s a “grown man” but I think we all know he’s proven to be a boy in a man’s body. The words he chose repeatedly are incredibly degrading and filled with hate.

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I am incredibly thankful that I did not meet with him.

What if I had and he surprised me with TV cameras and the pressure of it being aired on TV without giving me a chance to prepare myself for an interview and I answered a question in a bad way? How would he have reacted to the fact that I’m not the best on camera? Would he have cussed me out in public? Would he have followed me to my hostel?

The behavior he showed in the chat room proves that he has zero control over his anger and also proved that I was right not to have met with him.

I gotta give him points for creativity though, even if he didn’t meet with me he’d use my name to get paid either way.

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@heiditravels @stellabelle @fyrstikken @dollarvigilante

You didn't have a bad experience with steemit.
You had a bad experience with a person or persons.
This person was who they were long before steemit, just as you are who you are long before steemit.

Steemit didn't make this person who they are, just like it didn't make you who you are. You've all said steemit didn't make you. But we have made you wealthier.

For some reason, the platform strongly rewards attention whoring right now. Probably for the same reason people can't stop looking at a car wreck.
So you get what you earn, not what you deserve.
It's intentionally not fair as per everything @dantheman has said repeatedly.

We like you, but the platform owes you nothing.
If you disagree with this, I have attached the standard form to fill out in the future.

Thanks for listening!
Signed,
Everyone who is tired of seeing this circus continue.

Steemit might not have caused it. If I go to a bar, and someone pees on my shoe, the owner of the bar didn't cause it. But if it happens often enough, it makes me wonder if the owner of bar should be doing something attract a more continent clientele.

@sigmajin
You're missing my point. The point is we ARE the owners. If you're tired of seeing the circus, quit upvoting it. If you want to encourage better clientele, use your power to upvote quality content and do whatever you can to promote the tens of thousands of underrated minnows on this platform who will never ever see the light of day because they're being drowned out by the very few who regularly make the front page. A very few who are now using that platform to bash one another like children instead of acting like adults and using the mute button.

@heiditravels Prior to this post I had assumed that getting involved or even acknowledging it was beneath you. In my heart I was applauding you for taking the high road and just ignoring it. Was kind of shocked to see you even bother to respond. You do put out great content normally. I would like to know more about your mountain climbing.

She was accused of being "guilty" simply for remaining quiet on the matter. She's up against a master troll that capitalizes on others inability to be online 24/7, or have the desire to, to counter his propaganda campaigns against them.

He also has an army of sockpuppets and cronies backing him. It's a tough battle to even consider taking up and I commend her for having the courage to face her false accuser, who will likely continue targeting her for simply standing up to protect her reputation.

Some of us reached our breaking point and decided to stand up to this online tyrant. I hope more of this Community will use their voting power, as you state, to shun these types of individuals until something can be done in the code to help an individual block abusers.

Thanks for that.

Just to be clear here. The only part directed at heidi in my commentary were the parts where I directly used her name. Meaning I don't think she had a bad experience with steemit, just a handful of users. Same with the others making posts saying "steemit = bad, unsafe etc".

I'm horrified by the actions of those users, but the problem isn't steemit.
It's the people upvoting that sort of BS. When you upvote that, you are encouraging both sides to continue.

The rest of my commentary towards her was intended to say "heidi, honestly, none of us in our right minds thought your silence was evidence of guilt.". In fact speaking for myself, I had just assumed she had put him on mute. I was really proud of that. Hence I was shocked to find out, no it was just that she was AFK for a bit.

The rest of my commentary is directed to everyone who upvoted ANY of that mess.

Please consider what message you are sending to everyone, especially new users when you upvote anyone slinging mud at anyone else. Whether you think it's warranted or otherwise.

Is this really what you want the platform to turn into?

So here's the deal. If someone is slinging mud at someone else, hit the downvote button, then the mute button. First time, every time. You bop them on the nose like that enough then they will go sit in the corner and think about it. You're harming their bottom line.

Otherwise, literally everyone is making money from perpetuating a negative cycle and that is money being taken directly from people trying to do right and bring real lasting value.

Think about it.

@tuck-fheman I do applaud you for standing up and taking a stand in general. I'm not trying to diminish that or take away from it. Sometimes there is no right answer. You did what you felt was right. I know you to be a good person with a strong backbone and an excellent sense of right and wrong. I can admire and respect that.

But let's please make this the last time we financially support tit for tat. For the good of the platform. Just downvote it, mute it and walk away. If they have a large number of accounts and supporters legit or otherwise, then that's a sign we need to fix the platform so it rewards the behavior we want to see. To my mind that means reserving our upvotes solely for content that promotes what we really want to see more of.

Upvote the future, not the past.

I can't blame her for that ... she's under attack, so she has to come out and defend herself ... it's kind of like a rule ...

@luminousvisions
Who's blaming her? I'm simply stating that I had assumed her silence meant she was above it.

As for blame, that rests at the feet of the people arguing on the internet and the people upvoting them instead of chill content like that dolphins thing you are doing.

relax, that's just an expression

I mostly agree with you, but I think that she did a good thing ... fyrstikken's post is trending and that's damaging for her ... she has to defend herself ...

I completely understand your point @williambanks, I wasn't sure about writing this post, but I'm glad that I did, something about letting him get away without voicing the truth just didn't sit well with me. I certainly don't enjoy these types of conflicts and bringing more light to it is now causing that good ol' Barbra Streisand effect. I will be back to posting about adventures tomorrow.

Thanks @heiditravels !
We've continued the discussion over into tuck's latest blog.
https://steemit.com/censorship/@tuck-fheman/just-downvote-it-mute-it-and-walk-away-is-that-a-reasonable-solution
It's at a more academic and less personal level.
I hope you'll join us!

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@williambanks - well pointed out!
love the butthurt report :D

this seem to keep escalating -
can't believe all the upvotes this "butthurt" is getting
and not just this one specifically ~ but also what started it ...
the whole thread of this rebuttals!

seniors ( referring to those who have long been here) should be models
we follow you because you inspire
but if you all go on like this -

more trash are floating in this abyss
minnows and some other fishes are having a hard time breathing -

Well it seems I wasn't following you before. But that was incredibly well put. So I'm following you now!

The SteemIt community supported and financially rewarded his behaviour.

and also proved that I was right not to have met with him.

I thought it was not your decision not to meet him but his fault he didn't contacted you again... (Am I missing something?)

@liondani I want you as my lawyer when I have to face similar circumstances. That was the number one most penetrating comment in this whole sordid mess.

Way to cut to the chase, my brother.

...and she edited it to...

I am incredibly thankful that I did not meet with him.

...I guess she is not aware of that the block-chain has already stored/recorded her first original expression...to eternity archives... :)

@liondani
These things mean the same thing. She got a bad vibe, not at the last moment. But she didn't affirmatively disavow the moment she got that vibe either.

This is literally...
Fyrstikken's mind: "She didn't say no, thus it must mean yes".
Heidi's mind: "I didn't say yes, thus he must know I actually meant no, even though I never said it".

Men and women think differently. Fyrstikken thought he had a date basically set in stone. Heidi thought she needed to RSVP for that date to be confirmed, otherwise it would be a presumptive decline.

Guys, anything other than an explicit yes is actually a no.
Gals, men are not psychic. If there is any chance your intent may not be clear, please be explicit. Men won't hate you for turning them down, but they will be upset if you don't make it clear that the invitation is not being accepted.

Helpful video tutorial on the subject...

Here's the part of her post I found most interesting and makes me baffled at how he can claim that he thought she had agreed or that he even actually set something up. I continue to have serious doubts about his entire version of the events ...

"Please, let’s look at the logic of this. To my knowledge at this point there was a man in Peru who wanted to meet me. He knew I would be traveling alone. I’d never spoken to him or knew anything about him until this first time he’d reached out to me. I never gave him the specific dates that I would be in Lima. How could there be an “appointment” if he never knew when for sure I would be in town? He also claims to have spoiled his reputation for having to reserve 4 tables at a swanky restaurant… once again, I never told him for sure when I would be in Lima, let alone give him a specific time of day. For him to be able to make a reservation is just preposterous."

The drama continues

I am @fyrstikken - and I have been accused by this travel-blogger of being a liar - Well, I am not:

I am glad you "Prayed for me" - It inspired me to seek the truth and provide a screenshot from Rocket Chat Postpromotion Moderated 28th of July 2016.

Praise Be!

"Sounds like a great idea" is not a confirmation. Did she ever confirm the time and place?

Edit: What you have proven is that you blew up at @heiditravels over your own misunderstanding of a non-committal reply. An appointment includes a time and date and confirmation of those things. This is fairly basic stuff for someone who organizes things with people. If you don't get those things, you don't have an arrangement. How would she even know when and where to turn up?

so based on "sounds like a great idea" you made a breakfast reservation on a specific time and date and also hired a TV crew?

@fyrstikken Did she confirm a time and place?

@sigmajin The log is longer then the screenshot, go and check the rest yourself please.

On booking the restaurant, yes. I assumed she would send me a message on rocket-chat when she arrived, I was online all the time - she went dark. Yes I booked a reservation to make sure I had a great location available for her in the safest environment in Lima.

The point of the Interview was to promote the Steemit-Platform, http://steemit.com.pe and if you know anything about making a segment for Television you should know that freelancers, unless we own our own equipment, have to rent equipment from the studios who have them, in advance to be sure to have the RED Epic cameras, lenses, microphones and operators on stand-by. Or else I would risk that another production-crew would have the equipment on the dates I required them.

We don´t produce Television with cellphone-cameras you know, and since I am a freelancer I have to book the equipment for when we need it in advance. Should be no mystery how this works, stop acting so shocked.

"sounds like a great idea" - The non-committal response hot women give random dudes on the internet who ask them to hook up in a foreign country they are visiting to end the conversation nicely.

AFAICT according to the chat log, she never said another word to him after that response and never indicated anything before that comment that could possibly be misconstrued as an agreement to do anything with this person. This is all on him. Bad judgement once again on his part and he's once again passing the blame onto someone else.

Like I said before. At least Heidi should feel happy he didn't threaten (or actually) hire a killer to knife her to death like when he threatened to kill the Blackcoin Dev (Chat Log: http://pastebin.com/CiqGSfXD) over fyrstikken's own exchanges (CryptoRush) incompetence, lack of due diligence, delayed response and horrible implementation of code that ended up fleecing (according to reports) between 950BTC and 2500LTC belonging to their Customers.

smh

Stop wasting popcorn already!

This Steemit drama is unreal. But your Gif made it slightly better!

The Stig : Give me some popcorn

I'll say this -- exactly one of the following two statements is true:

  1. Heidi is outright lying in this post about making a commitment to meet up

or

  1. The whales and other powers that be need to seriously rethink the support they give to Fyrstikken.

I wish I did not upvote his OP now. Maybe I will go and remove it, if it is not too late...

Thanks for clearing this up. <3

I think what's most important in this issue are two points:

  • @fyrstikken has no proof of an actual approved appointment, with date, time and everything.
  • @fyrstikken can be seen using language that's clearly not the language one should use in a situation like this. Sorry fyrstikken, but calling someone a cunt whore is just not going to solve the problem. It's making your case worse though. Good luck winning my respect back.

Man that dude is a loose cannon, a real man would NEVER use that sort of language with a lady in any discussion public or private, its just so wrong. I think you made the right decision about your safety.

Don't pay him any mind, clearly he's a psychotic loser who has some serious issues...

Best thing to do is to ignore him and all extensions of his negativity.

That, and I mean, I don't enjoy bashing people.. especially appearance-wise.. but..

He's the typical "neckbeard" loser, troll.. Literally..
Just look at him.. Disgusting.

Keep your head up and fuck what he claims. Probably just mad that yet ANOTHER beautiful, successful woman wanted nothing to do with him..
Don't let the negativity get to you. We love you here on steemit and we love to watch you travel and enjoy yourself! He's simply a misogynistic sack of garbage and it's only showing more and more. Probably salty that his posts aren't nearly as valuable as yours (most likely because half the time, he's full of shit and the other half the time, he's talking about useless garbage or being narcissistic where narcissism would honestly be pathetic as he is toxic and nowhere close to good looking/well behaved and respectful).

@fyrstikken: "She agreed to a TV-Interview to promote Steemit when she came to Perú."
@heiditravels: "I never made an appointment with him. "
Two opposite tales, which to believe?

Edit: Fair enough, I do agree with my replies. @fyrstikken made the first accusation, so it's up to him to prove anything. So I'll consider @heiditravels innocent until then.

Innocent until proven guilty.

Burden of proof is on the accuser.

I find the fact that the Steemit community brought his posts to the front page and rewarded them more offensive than @fyrstikken's behaviour itself.

Again it easnt the steemit community but a subsection of the community who i assure you always upvote his content no matter what it is. Ge is leveraging his peergroup to get upvotes and there is nothing wrong with that. His actions might not makr you happy but he has figured out how to use a group of friends to give him more power on here. Isnt that what steem is about though?

they're not necessarily mutually exclusive. At least not the specific statements above.

Fyrst says
: we should meet up when youre in peru you can be on my show.

heidi says something non comittal or maybe positive like "sure ill give you a call"

then heidi mentions she was in peru (and never called). Now fyrst is upset becasue he realizes hes been blown off.

Fyrst gets pissed then embellishes a story about a camera crew to make himself look more like an aggrieved party.

I've never bought the camera crew story to begin with. Because he does a radio show, right? I mean he already has the crew there, and allegedly an audience of 200, 000 and he's enough of a performer/talker to do a show solo. Does he really send them home or does he make an actual show by himself (talking trash on heidi for not showing up).

All that said, from this perspective, it sounds super creepy.

What I'm thinking is ...
was this "chatroom" conversation with fyrstikken or with tuck-fheman with an alias of fyrstikken?

It's precisely the same conversation as @fyrstikken admitted to "EXPLOD[ing] at her" in his post.

Then, I suppose fyrstikken (in my opinion) is on the same level of morality as nkdk.
I cannot control the powerful, so even though they are up to no good I can only hope capitalism will help bring some correction. Thanks demotruk for making that clear.

"Did I flag you?" ~ No, you'r cool. @r4ken has been flagging a lot of people with low account value. Apparently he is pissed at dan and ned over some censorship of his account.
@tuck-fheman, after miss-judging you like that I have checked out your posts and found a new respect for you. 😉

Seeing as how you flagged that comment despite the fact it was just a question, @demotruck(thank you) already showed me the truth, and I acknowledged..... I'm not sure what else one would want me to do to get my reputation back. I could just become another person of many talking about how Steem dumps unprivileged users to the curb. Or I could recognize that r4ken is most likely the true flagger.

Did I flag you? I don't see that I did. But I'm curious because for some reason I have you muted, which usually means that someone flagged me. ;)

Edit : oh you're not muted, it's because someone flagged you here. my mistake.

BTW, Why am I the only one upvoting @demotruk's comment; But, 5 votes exist on my comment?

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