Goals and Preparation.

I've always been kind of lazy. Kind of. I can turn on a switch and get a bunch stuff done when I need to, but that often times brings a lot of stress. Letting things pile up and then being productive in one giant chaotic day. I think a lot of us can relate to what I'm saying.

I want to change that about myself. I don't usually want to change, I'm a bit stubborn. But I am tired of this bad habit.

Former NFL QB Peyton Manning made a career of terrorizing NFL teams. Specifically my Titans, twice a season. But growing up, despite the fact that he beat up my Titans most times, I secretly admired him. He was relentless. Always a few steps ahead, all the time. Always. Every time. Every game. I repeat myself so much because that's honestly the Peyton Manning effect.

I used to wonder how a player can always be on top of his game, always consistent. Well now I'm obviously older and I can see part of what made him so great. His preparation.

Looking back it's silly that I didn't notice this trait of his. He never made it a big secret. Watch any interview/press conference. The guy says preparation a thousand times.

That's amazing. I underestimate planning, preparing. Sure, some may thrive under that type of stress, doing things off the top of your head. Relying on instinct. But I believe even those people, if they were truly honest with themselves, would admit getting prepared would benefit them so much better. If they still believe that freestyling is the way to go they either have never prepared themselves and seen the benefits, or they are crazy.

I don't know, I'm just some dude.

I know the days I studied, or mentally prepared, or packed, or started early, or whatever other example you want to use, I usually thrived and acted with a genuine confidence that I wouldn't normally have. Sure adrenaline can get you through a lot of things and sometimes you can get through it well. But I believe that this mindset is similar to using a Nitrus (pardon the spelling) boost in a racing video game. You use it too often or too early, you can be lost. Whereas if you time the boosts correctly and use them to your advantage you can't lose. That's another way prep beats freestyling. If you study/prepare enough and make it a habit, the moments you need to freestyle you can do it amazingly. Muscle memory, confidence.

I love writing. I always have. But my laziness kills me, many of my posts are honestly written in a bit of a rush. I am probably not shocking anyone, its not like I am an amazing blogger, but I know I can be. Most times I just get inspired and go. But with writing that is scary. I don't want to be that guy. I want to be more consistent. I want better quality out of myself. I always said I would love to make money writing, now that I can I need to start making the most out of it. Stop making up excuses.

I can see Steemit like a personal business in a way. A beautiful expressive no-boss business. Now business is business, I have to create content. I want to. Writing has always made me feel free and empowered. Now with Steemit, I have literally no reason not to start working harder.

I think I need to create and commit to a healthy routine. Start it simple at first, I've tried a routine and was going too hard and crashed and burned. Routine out the window.

Maybe make sure I write everyday. I had a creative writing class in 9th grade that taught me a nice exercise. Pick up a pencil and just start writing whatever the hell is on your mind. Any stray thought, anything thats floating in your head, write it.

I also want to read my book I have that will improve my writing, and show me tips. Writing a Novel and Getting Published for dummies I think it is.

Maybe exercise a bit every day. I have noticed I am most unhappy when I haven't exercised or moved in awhile. I have been an athlete since I was eight. I'm meant to be active. It keeps my brain and attitude healthier.

I've been sad or mad or depressed for too long. I need to start tackling life and start accomplishing things.

Lil Peep died six days ago, and it surprisingly has bothered me. He was an emo type of rap artist who died at twenty-one. I am twenty-two. I wasn't a BIG fan but I was a fan. Still am. There's just something insanely sad about his death. He rapped about his deep sadness and death in almost every single song that he has. Listening and watching him now gives me the chills. Oh and he was absolutely insanely talented. He accomplished so much and was beloved by so many. It's such an odd contradiction. Messes me up.

RIP 1996-2017

His style and personality was one of a kind. I believe he expressed his true self fearlessly. I don't know how many of us can say that about themselves.

I bring up Lil Peep passing because, his death saddens me and in a weird way motivates me. I hope that that's a positive reaction. I don't know. But it motivates me because it is yet another reminder of everybody's final chapter. He lived fearlessly. He went out and made success happen. Sadly he passed but now we can all see the impact he had on this world. Truly amazing.

We are all gonna die. I don't want to be a loser forever. Seeing a rising start like Peep go really kicked me in the butt. If I go tomorrow, what did I contribute to this world? What did I accomplish. I'm not saying I wish to or expect to make an impact to the scale of what Lil Peep did, but still I need to step it up in life. I want to be great too, like Peep.

RIP Peep, thanks for being fearless, and for being an amazing artist.

Steem on everyone.

Image sources
https://shortridgedailyecho.org/1523/student-life/procrastinate-properly-people-part-1/
http://www.businessinsider.com/peyton-manning-nailed-why-he-was-one-of-the-best-quarterbacks-ever-2016-3
http://www.citypages.com/music/rip-lil-peep-a-6-song-introduction-to-the-late-emo-rapper/458035983!