DREAMY SHAPESHIFTING HORSE-BOY | The Roving Vlogger Day 70 (2017-12-08)
I've been carrying along a dream journal since freshman year of college. I'm not even sure how it happened - it's the only paper thing I have here apart from my passport, though my parents have some childhood journals, favorite books, and important documents of mine. It's high time I digitize the notebook and recycle it.
Typing it up is a strange form of time travel. I only remember the lucid dreams with any clarity - many of the normal dreams don't ring the faintest bell of recognition. However, even though the journal's contents don't contain any real-life events, I can see what filled my subconscious at the time.
The lucid dreams were pure wish fulfillment - flying, adventuring through new dimensions, eating dozens of pies, swimming with dolphins, kissing mysteriously handsome authors... It's funny to read about my first experiences with sleep paralysis and testing new lucidity techniques, but it's also sad because I remember how much I used my dreams as escapism. I took naps when things got too stressful and talked with people on the LD4all forums when I was lonely. I would have been better off meeting up with friends for a walk or a meal, but the effort seemed like too much.
The normal, boring dreams are also revealing. I had stress nightmares about midterms followed by false awakenings into my childhood bedroom, which I still referred to as "home". My family made frequent appearances between dreams about traveling and moving to new places. I was clearly in a state of transition.
Most of my dreams were centered around trying to help people, but I wasn't very good at it. I was self-conscious and bumbling and apologetic. When dream characters mocked me, I stood there and accepted what they said as truth. I would like to say that I'm more self-assured now, but the same things still happen in my dreams today. Only now, instead of sharing electric touches with shapeshifting horse-boys, I already have a dream version of my boyfriend at my side.
ANYWAY, I know nothing's more boring than hearing about other people's dreams.
Speaking of paper going obsolete, Nash keeps wondering why the library still offers printed books. I assure him that we're moving toward fully digital libraries, but it will take time. I get 90% of my library books as ebooks that can be downloaded to my Kindle whether I'm lying in my own bed or in a cafe on the other side of the world. They're far more convenient and efficient.
But all of this just makes paper more nostalgic, which makes each trip to the library a delight. I volunteered for years at the library in my hometown and being surrounded by shelves of books makes me feel safe and cozy. What would the library be without all those colorful spines to browse and pages to thumb through? I want to visit one of the new-fangled paperless libraries to find out.
Ramble over!
What do you think of paper? Have you ever kept a dream journal? Let me know!
- Katie, @therovingreader
I keep and collect a ton of journals- I still have one from middle school. Reading that one is an exercise in embarassment though, as I was super boy crazy. I still have a journal that I write in semi-regularly, as well as a journal that I keep all my poetry in
My very first journals I threw away because I was so embarrassed by them! Now I have these video journals as a substitute for paper, but regardless of the format I really like having them to help process and remember things. So cool that you have one for your poetry too!