Day 5: Insecurity and Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone
Transcript: In this video I’m going to do something a little unusual. I’m going to attempt to invite in insecurity and see it as an ally and not an enemy. I’m going to invite it into my body and welcome it as a friend instead of pushing it away as an enemy. I’m going to see if I feel more empowered with insecurity on my side than when I try to push it away.
(I do a quick exercise to focus on what insecurity is at its essence and let myself embody and understand that essence.)
Hmm, well that was rather uneventful. Strangely enough, I feel less insecure. I feel ready to just be myself!
Hey, this is just a video. We’re just friends talking. There is no mandate for what this has to be. There are no critics for me to appease. This is just a moment in time that we’re sharing. And if you’re drawn to this, you’re drawn to this. And if you’re not, no big deal.
I’m just stepping a little outside of my comfort zone and I’m discovering that maybe it’s not so bad to be out here. Maybe good things will be discovered. Maybe I won’t create some next great video on this first take, but maybe the act of be willing to step out here and just share and be myself and connect and a level that goes beyond text, will lead me down the road to have more connections like this or feel more free to express myself like this. And that could lead to countless possibilities.
The reason that insecurity can have such a stranglehold on keeping you back, is because you think that in order to overcome that insecurity you need to be "good enough." It’s not enough to just struggle with your insecurity, you have to knock it out of the park. And if you can’t knock it out of the park, you don’t even start that fight.
Which makes sense. I wouldn’t start a physical fight with some dude that’s just going to kick my ass. But maybe in putting up that initial fight, you strengthen yourself. Or you let whatever is holding you back know that you’re not just going to stand idly by and let it ruin your life. And then all of a sudden it looks at you differently. You might still be this scrawny kid compared to this big, strong bully; but it’ll look at you differently. And you’ll look at yourself differently. And you’ll find that the bruises and the bumps and the scrapes, they don’t really matter. They don’t really matter when compared to your mettle, to your ability to say,“I’m standing up to this. I want something better than what insecurity has been holding me back from.”
In just being willing to make that tiny little change from a victim of insecurity, to a challenger of insecurity; that creates a mindset where maybe you can overcome this thing. You could become the David who slays Goliath.
The greater intention of what you’re trying to do matters more in the long run than the quality of product you’re putting out.
If I could give any advice so that insecurity doesn’t seem like such a big bad bully anymore, it would be that the things that appear scary and a threat to you are really just evidence that you’re playing smaller than you’re capable of playing.
f you shrunk down in size, every day things would appear gigantic. I don’t know if anyone here is of age to have seen Honey I’ve Shrunk the Kids, where sprinklers going off became floods and ants became giant terrorists; and this whole world that we take for granted became giant threats because they were playing so small.
That’s what insecurity does to us. It keeps us playing so small so that things that pose no threat to us when we’re playing at a level that’s actually our size. When we’re seeing ourselves for who we really are, insecurity poses zero threat. Zero! It’s only fact that we see ourselves for less than we really are that we think our insecurities are worth being afraid of, or something worth hiding from. And that’s just not the case.
Thanks for reading!
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Embrace Your Insecurities, The Full Series:
Day 0: Exceed Your Love Limits
Day 1: Coming Out of the Closet
Day 2: The Transformative Power of Insecurity
Day 3: Opening the Door to Love
Day 4: Sexual Incompatibility and Innovation