What is the best way to move forward when faced with Dissension within your Community-TribeSteemUp ByWeekly Question
Within any community it is normal for members to disagree , to have different opinions and to have to face confrontation from time to time. We can all be very different in how we think, in how we act and how we live. But for any community to really work well, there needs be core principles put in place that are agreed upon by everyone and a clear understanding on how the community operates, so that everyone feels valued and appreciated. Once that is put in place, hopefully the community will not have to deal with much conflict or discord.
But when dissension is present, when there is a strong disagreement, a strong conflict it, is very important that it is dealt with correctly. It is very important that no one feels alienated by what has occurred and that the way is paved for open dialogue between the community members, so that everything can be discussed. Everyone needs to be given the opportunity to speak and be heard without any fear of attack, it is vital that everyone feels that they have been listened to and heard without any interruptions. Everyone needs to be respected in their right to be heard. For this reason it is helpful to have some one act as a mediator, because emotions also run high when there is open conflict or discord.
It is important that we remember that although we do not agree with other people and we have every right not too, it is important to accept them for who they are. We have all walked different paths in our lives and we have been shaped by our experiences in life. Nothing is ever black or white and so many things colour the choices and decisions, we make, we have no idea what journey some one else has been on, or what has led them to think the way they think.
We have to remember to be tolerant, even if what we are hearing really upsets us, even if the other person or persons actions upset us. There is a reason why, this conflict has occurred , there is a reason why that person feels the way they feel. In remembering these things it can help to keep the communication open, non violent and respectful. Because it is so easy to become defensive and close off any understanding or willingness to listen.
We need to be patient and allow the person the time they need to talk about why they feel, why they said, or why the acted the way they did. I keep coming back to this point, but nothing is ever clear cut, we are never clear cut, we all carry our baggage, our stories and we are only seen as right if others agree with us. It really depends on what the community stands for.
It is so disrespectful to not listen to some one and to talk over them when they speak, because what they have to say matters, it matters to them and it matters to us so that we can learn and move forward.
It's funny, we all KNOW this, but we aren't too good at putting it into practice when it's need. Practice is key I guess!
Oh I know, we do need reminding, emotions can run so high at times like this and we can easily get lost and turn it into a battle instead xxx thank you lovely xx
Nicely written!
One could even say this is - partly - what we are here for in the first place. To be able to make these experiences and learn from them in order to master our life better. It also helps to see the other you in everyone else.
exactly all conflicts are such a great opportunity for learning, had much more to say but was feeling a bit under the weather yesterday, glad the main point came across cheers @flauwy
Always important to remember that any so-called "outer conflict & dissension" is simply a reflection attracted to that same energy inside us. We HAVE that same issue lurking somewhere - unresolved. And so it's much more than just non violent communication and agreeing to disagree - it's an invitation to resolve an inner conflict and dissension. A gift, actually. :)
very true indeed, always an opportunity to learn and improve ourselves xx