Does it Hurt?
I sat right in the corner, my back against the wall. Head down looking at my phone pretending to be busy working, but in all honesty, i was busy listening to a conversation between a married couple two tables away. I don't usually eardrops but i cant help it, they were loud especially the wife. The husband was lowering his voice yet you hear some control in his voice, it is like a moment away to a volcanic eruption.
Looking at them, they were slightly older than me, they are in their early 40's, From their conversation, my best bet is that they have 2 kids that are currently in school.
The husband is on a coverall, I believe he is working for an oil and gas related and the wife is a full-time housewife handling the housework and kids.
Although their conversation or may i say an argument is a typical argument between a married couple, listening in give me a whole different perspective when i think about deeply about it.
The Argument
It all started with the husband getting a bit of scolding for getting the wrong food and drink ordered by his wife. She kept on saying that it is typical of him getting everything messes up. The husband response was an admission of mistake but right before the husband were to do anything, the wife begins nagging about everything else that the husband didn't do right such as always didn't put the toilet seat up, didn't close the tap properly, haven't fix the fan although its been weeks she requested for it, didn't help out at home etc and so many others that i cant recall.
Suddenly the husband stood up and say, i need you to have patience as much as i patience listening to your nagging. I am sorry for all the sorries i said, but if you were to celebrate all the good things i have done right as much as you nag on all my little mistakes, only then that would be fair.
The wife got quiet a little, pull the husband hand and ask to sit then said, " if only you were in my shoe ". Then they were a little bit quiet in their conversation.
What The F
That was it, that all i heard. God dammit. It was going to be a good drama to listen in to hear and perhaps to get a lesson from out of it.
So, i decided to stop pretending to busy, read more pretend email on my phone, drink coffee as well as listening in to the couple conversation, but my mind started racing to figure out what was the continuation of their conversation. The last word i heard was "if only you were in my shoe" i was thinking that the wife must be explaining why she been agitated, or get angry fast for little thing.
Moments later, i notice that the husband was holding her wife hand tightly and wipe her tears. As for me, i pretend i am invisible.
They stood up and walk out of the cafe.
What I Learned
I am the kind that would like to think good things out of everyone or circumstances. This is because negativity is the root of all evil. LOL, So positivity is the key to a happier you.
So, after the couple left, i let my mind assume the good things that happen to the couple. i assume that they got it all patch up and the husband does better the next day. Let's be honest, the conversation is too short to play a blame game on who was at fault in the circumstance, plus its none of my business.
But one thing that got into my head is the word "if only you were in my shoe". These words got to me, and allow me to see things in a different light. To imagine to be on person shoe, the journey, pain and joy they deal with on daily basis shape up who they are and how they respond to anything.
I learn the need to take a second to imagine what if i were in the other person shoe, perhaps trying to imagine and understand why and how it hurt, will make me a better person whenever i respond to someone that is in pain, down, angry , frustrated or in a unhappy state.
Everyone has their good day and bad day, during my bad of days, i sometimes now feels that i wish other would consider stepping into my shoe for a day to understand how i feel during my worst of days.
All this is beyond empathy , it being responsible in dealing with others people heart and emotion, being emotionally intelligence.
When was the last time you step in other people's shoe? does it hurt?
Lapar bh tu dts y smua jadi monster ehehehehehe
Weiiiii.. Kau pula tu. Welcome to steemit. Lol
Hehehehe tqseee kuyaaa
Betul juga. Lol it could be
Lol
There's a saying "Don't judge me until you walk a mile in my shoes or live a day in my life". Sometimes I felt argument is a necessity in every couple life, we tend to kumpul all those small negative feelings and then exploded.. I guess that's what happen to that couple. Hopefully things got better afterwards.
Yes bro, argument is indeed neccesary, it is important as learning to let go of the frustration after an argument. It's not about winning the argument, more so trying to understand your partners feels about certain issues. The challenge is learning to patch up quickly and throw away any negativity.
Cheers for dropping a note.
Perhaps this require teammalaysia all boys only club. Lol. Since there is this group for ladies. Lol..
Thank you for sharing your thought about this issue @danieldoughty. I understand what you wanted to bring up here. Argument between a husband and a wife is quite a common thing, when they get to understand each other and patch things up, they will bond even better. We will never know what the other person is feeling until we step into their shoe. The only way to know that is through communication and experiencing it ourselves. So, when I have an argument with my wife, I am the one who usually gave in as I understood her frustration.
I understand bro, not many husband try to understand how is it like in the wife shoe. Likewise, no many wife's tried walking on husband shoe too.
Happy Valentine to you both laki Bini.. Hehe
Same to you too, wishing you and @viverridae an awesome Valentine's Day