3:33 (Original Short Story)

in #story7 years ago


By Tim Machinee

Ryan woke up and looked at his clock. It was 3:33 in the morning. For the last few nights something made him wake up at 3:33. Perhaps more a subconscious force than anything else. Each time it had happened he would look toward his bedroom clock and quickly fall back to sleep. That is to say Ryan thought he fell back to sleep. After what would seem like a momentary closing of his eyes Ryan would look back to the bedroom clock again to see the time was now somehow earlier at 3:23. Then a feeling of being tired would overwhelm Ryan and he didn't wake up again until the morning daylight.

The first night that it happened Ryan thought he had slept around the clock to the next night. In the morning Ryan discovered he had not missed a day. Ryan shrugged it off as simply misreading the clock.

The second night only made it more puzzling. The same events as the night before: Waking up at 3:33, closing of the eyes and a second glance at the clock revealing it was 3:23. As Ryan thought back to his hypothesis of misreading the clock a strong urge made him feel sleepy again. The next thing Ryan was conscious of was waking up in the morning.

The third night was different. Ryan figured that if it happened a third time it would mean he was in some kind of weird sleep cycle. The only way to get a good night sleep was to break the cycle.

As Ryan was falling asleep on the third night Ryan visualized the bedroom clock in his mind reading 3:33. "Don't go to sleep at three thirty-three," Ryan repeated softly in his mind. After what seemed like a split second Ryan looked at the clock. Again, it was exactly 3:33.

The same strong force made Ryan sleepy. Ryan closed his eyes without thinking and when he opened his eyes the clock then read 3:23. Ryan began to feel tired like the previous two nights. However, there was a second force new to that night. For some reason Ryan had the thought of going into his bedroom closet for the next ten minutes. Ryan couldn't explain where the thought came from. There was no rational reason to it other than being on his feet would keep him awake. Ryan entered his closet and left the door ajar.

Ryan peeked into the bedroom to watch the clock. 3:25 came and went ...3:27...3:28... As time progressed it also seemed to move as slow as the waxing moon above his house.

As 3:33 was born nothing occurred. Each second after seemed like its own unremarkable plane of existence.

Thirty-three seconds after 3:33 there was a sound of sliding across the bed sheets.

Ryan opened the closet door and looked at himself lying in the bed.

"Now what?"


hmm...I would have narrated the story in the first person mode and then the shock of seeing himself in the bed would have more impact. Also I find first person mode of narration impacts the reader more , unless, of course, you're going to be weaving back and forth in time and space. A novel idea nonetheless :)

Thanks for the feedback. This is experimental writing for something that I am planning that will be a larger story.

Pretty cool story! I love time travel - it has so many story possibilities already built in. :)

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