The Allies of Old; Book Two Renewal: Chapter Forty - Part One Finale "Memories and Visions"

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If you have not read the first book of the series, "Reborn", it is advisable you do so before reading "Renewal" or you will be lost. This link will provide you with a series summary as well as all sixty-eight chapters of Reborn

Chapter Forty

Matthias generally won the battle to suppress these memories, but he knew he would not tonight.

He had not been the same male back then, he’d been shy and soft spoken with females, stammering when he spoke to them. Caly had been his polar opposite, outgoing and constantly chattering. He’d been lost the moment she’d first looked his way.

They’d had a ceremony and then he’d mated with her, bonding himself for all eternity. He’d never been so happy in his life, she was the air he breathed.

Some of his friends at the time had tried to talk him out of it, had told him he didn’t need to mate to continue a relationship or even to have children which he desperately wanted. They hadn’t trusted her and it made him angry. The fool he was had defended her vehemently, telling them if they couldn’t support it then they weren’t truly his friends.
But they had been right.

Four months into their bonding she broke it with another male. He’d been in the midst of a battle when it happened, agonizing pain ripping through his body and mind, shattering his soul. The same friends who had warned him instantly understood what was happening and carried him to a safe place where they stayed with him for the three days it took him to ride out the pain. The physical pain anyway, the emotional stayed with him much longer.
He’d known instinctively that if he confronted her too soon he would kill her so he had stayed far away, but eventually she had sought him out.

She came to him on her knees in tears, begging him to forgive her, claiming the warrior had manipulated and seduced her. Claiming she hadn’t known what she would put him through. Claiming that she loved him. He had tried to resist, but he’d been weak where she was concerned and after a while he had given in.

At first he’d refused to bond with her again, choosing the relationship his friends had initially suggested. But a year passed and she gave him an ultimatum, bond with her or she would never have his children.
For two years he fought in battles and came home to her bed and all appeared to be well. But then he began hearing rumors that she’d been seen with a known fallen male. At the time it was a very serious charge as any contact with the fallen could result in a prison sentence or even death. And a vampire prison was hell on earth, buried far beneath the ground and reinforced with spells that prevented escape.

They had fought viciously over the accusations but she’d denied the claims. Since there hadn’t been any actual proof he’d eventually relented, believing it was possible she had been mistaken for someone else.
The second time she’d broken the bond he had been on his way home and alone. He’d suffered through the agony in an abandoned woodshed, and when he was physically able to leave he’d gone after her with murderous intent. He’d tracked her to a village he’d never seen, the scent of vampires heavy in the air. Realizing he may have discovered a coven of the damned he had quickly blurred back to his own village for reinforcements. They’d returned to the place at daybreak and not a soul was outside. Mayhem had ensued as they began kicking down doors and tossing vampires into the streets where they had burned, one after another.

He had found her cowering in the corner of one of the last of the shelters. He could still remember the horror he’d felt when he realized her fear was not of him but of the rays of light shining through the doorway.

“Why?” he’d whispered, his fury drowning in sorrow for the female he’d loved who was forever lost. He’d been pulled from the house by his friends before she could answer and he’d sat in the dirt numbly as they’d dragged her shrieking, flailing form through the doorway. As he’d watched her burn a bone numbing coldness had filled him and he’d left the forsaken village a changed male.

For years he’d despised women, believing them all deceptive and evil creatures, taking them to bed in anger and leaving them after sex without remorse. Until a close friend made a flippant remark about how weak he was for allowing one female to shape his life. After that he had changed once more. He let go of the past, his bitterness and resentment, and learned to love women…in a superficial way.

From then until now he’d never felt anything but a fleeting desire. A sea of female faces floated past in his mind’s eye, their names either forgotten or never learned.

Until Jenna. Damn her! He stretched out his hearing and the sounds of her soft breathing taunted him, telling him she slept peacefully while he tossed and turned. Fucking wench. He tried to convince himself he only felt more for her due to her relationship with Anna and her involvement in his world because of it.

A lie. He’d wanted her from the first moment he’d laid eyes on her standing in the middle of Michael’s lawn, his body reacting fiercely.

He took in a long breath and pushed it out harshly. Whatever this was, it was bad for him. He decided he would not touch her again.

Jenna woke that morning with a start. She drew in a ragged breath and pulled a pillow over her face. She’d been plagued with dreams of him all through the night and the last one had been a vision of his past. A past where he’d been with a female vampire who looked like her.

She couldn’t remember the details beyond seeing the two of them together, but the way he’d touched her and held her….Jenna felt a lick of jealousy followed closely by anger. So that was the reason he was attracted to her, she reminded him of some long ago lover. Bastard! She would not let him touch her again.

An image of him as a child wielding an imaginary sword filled her mind and she gritted her teeth. Why am I dreaming about his past?

It doesn’t matter, she thought, I’m done with him.

She decided she would start looking around at other males....Men, she corrected irritably. Surely now that she was no longer frigid she would be attracted to plenty of others. She nodded firmly and dragged herself out of bed.

She walked into the kitchen where Anna and Jared were tangled together and found her eyes rolling.

“What?” Anna caught the look and swiveled in Jared’s arms.

“Nothing, sorry, just got up on the wrong side of bed.”

Jared nipped Anna’s chin and she giggled nipping his nose in return.

Sickening, Jenna thought then frowned inwardly. No begrudging your friend’s happiness, she admonished.

Mathias came into the room and froze her with the coldness of his regard. An expression meant only for her as it disappeared the minute Will and Josh made an appearance, replaced with his usual lazy smile. She had no such changeability. She continued to shoot darts at him every time he even looked in her general direction.

Anna pried herself loose of her mate and grabbed Jenna’s arm. “Let’s go for a walk, it’ll probably be awhile before we get to enjoy the lake view again.”

Once they were about a hundred yards away and nearing the gate that blocked off the state park road Anna stopped and turned to her. “Okay, what is going on with you and Mathias, and don’t tell me nothing.”

Jenna frowned. “But it is nothing,” she insisted.

“Jenna.”

She sighed, “I don’t know. I’m physically attracted to him but otherwise I despise him. I mean he’s gorgeous, undeniably, but he’s a total bastard. And he just gets under my skin. That’s pretty much it. Really.”

Anna studied her and nodded. “Okay. So, what are your plans from here? I know everyone excluded you yesterday, but I really want to insist on you coming with us…except your issues with Mathias…”

Jenna groaned. “I would love to come with you but you’re right, Mathias’s presence would continuously piss me off. Anyway I decided I’m going to head to Harri’s and then from there I might go to France to see Dominique, find out if she knows anything. See if there are any prophecies or written history that we could use.”

“Great! That’s a really good idea….Jenna?” Anna watched her friend’s face drain of color, her eyes glazing over and felt a jolt of fear. “Jenna!” she grabbed a hold of her arm and shook her.

Jenna blinked and gasped for air. “Oh my God, I just saw Jess!”

Anna looked around wildly, “Where?”

“No, not here, in my mind- she was in this enormous room with expensive looking furniture... damn it, why wasn’t there more?”

Anna cringed, “I shouldn’t have shaken you.”

“No, no, it’s not your fault, I must have looked freaky.” Jenna rubbed her temples. She’d felt an acute pain flash inside her head just before the vision struck and her head still ached dully.

“Just a little bit. From now on I’ll know what that face means and leave you alone. I’m sure you’ll have another one, right?” Anna asked hopefully.

“Yeah…she looked healthy anyway, so that’s good, isn’t it?”

“Definitely!”

They headed back towards the house, Jenna trying to will the vision to return and tell her something useful- like where the hell her sister was? That would be nice. When they reached the porch she turned to Anna. “Do you think she’s with Tyros?”

Anna frowned. “I don’t know. I’ve thought about it a thousand times and in some ways I’m not sure if it would be a good or bad thing. I mean, yes he’s not fallen but why wouldn’t he let anyone know she was okay?”

“Yeah, if he does have her I’m going to strangle him.” She reached inside her pocket and pulled out her cigarettes and they settled onto the porch swing.

“A room with expensive furniture,” Anna mused. “What if she didn’t turn out like me?” Jenna winced and Anna shook her head emphatically, “No, I don’t mean that she turned out like the others, like an animal, I just mean what if something did happen to her thinking process? Because it seems really weird that she wouldn’t demand to contact us, especially if Tyros has her, by now she should have been able to convince him or…I don’t know. I wish I would’ve pressed her more about what went on between them, especially when he disappeared.”

Jenna nodded and sighed, “Me too. Something happening to her thinking process…like amnesia you mean? Do you think maybe she doesn’t know who she is and where she came from?” Her expression glazed over and she bit down on her lip. “I don’t know,” she said quietly, “but for some reason that’s striking a chord.”

Anna frowned. “That’s a little scary, I mean if she doesn’t know who she is, how…damn, I was just throwing things out there- it’s really striking a chord?”

Jenna focused outward trying to capture the feeling. “N..no and yes somehow. That doesn’t make any sense. I don’t know. I guess time will tell. Or at least I hope it will. Damn it Jess, where the fuck are you?”

Six Weeks earlier

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