Adopting The Adoption Culture: A Lesson For Teachers

in #steemiteducation6 years ago (edited)

A teacher’s job is more complex than simply conveying pieces of knowledge, and as time passes and the world changes, the task of helping children learn becomes more dynamic as the students become more diverse in culture, religion, gender and family backgrounds. To ensure that you have the best interest of your students at heart, these differences need to be considered when preparing and communicating lessons. 

When we adopted our son in 2015, as a new mother, I immediately began to worry – that’s what moms do right! One of my concerns was that his teacher/s or other caregivers would not be equipped well enough to handle sensitive situations that might arise, situations that could possibly leave my child feeling vulnerable, isolated and perhaps somewhat confused. 

This post stems from @steemiteducations recent homework task: 


Everyone should be treated equally. How do you deal with different cultures in one classroom? How do you handle conflict between learners from different cultures? READ MORE HERE

Before I continue I would like to define the term culture and make you as a reader aware that adoption is in fact a culture, a growing one at that.

Culture Defined:

Culture encompasses religion, food, what we wear, how we wear it, our language, marriage, music, what we believe is right or wrong, how we sit at the table, how we greet visitors, how we behave with loved ones, and a million other things," Cristina De Rossi, an anthropologist at Barnet and Southgate College in London, told Live Science. - https://www.livescience.com/21478-what-is-culture-definition-of-culture.html

In an effort to create awareness of adoption as a culture in the educational system, I would like to introduce a few popular assignments or lesson themes – themes that might be difficult for adopted children to absorb or complete, without the educator’s assistance and understanding. 


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Teachers, kindly consider the following approaches when setting these or similar assignments: 


  • Autobiographies

Requesting that an adopted or fostered child to write an autobiography can cause a stir of emotions to rise to the surface, since often, these kids have experienced traumatic or uncomfortable events in their past – situations which are not very easy to share. There are also most likely to be blank spaces where adopted children don’t have much info or memories from when they are younger, especially if they have moved between foster homes and they have lost contact with those foster parents.   

Here’s how you can swing this as a teacher: Instead of requesting that an autobiography is written on a student's entire lifespan, rather suggest that they write about a unique life event, or a specific time span, say of 3 or 4 years of their own choosing. This way they get to choose an easier part of their lives to write about.

  • Family Trees

This is probably one of the most popular projects done in schools around the world. Knowing where you come from is important and recognizing that families come in all different shapes, colors and sizes is important too. This is an important assignment and shouldn’t be left out of the curriculum.

This is a lesson that could make an adoptee feel a little uncomfortable and out of place however, especially when a standard family tree only allows room for one family, often forcing a child to choose between their birth or adoptive family. The student might also not know the different family members from his or her birth family.

What you can do as a teacher: The solution here simple. Instead of focusing on the traditional family tree layout, introduce a concept called rooted trees, where the birth family could be placed on the roots and the adoptive family on the branches. For older children you could give them an option of doing a genogram, which includes various symbols to indicate family members and the relationships, adoption symbols are included. A more modern idea is to assign the students to do a "family home" or a "caring tree" where they only need to add the people they are actually living with, or those that give immediate care to them. 

  • The Topic of Genetics

It is most likely that this subject will be approached at some point in a child's schooling career. Questions like "Whose nose do you have?" or "Who do you look the most like in your family?"  are certain to arise. Such questions might be impossible for an adopted child to answer and can be hurtful for them to admit that they live with a family who they don't resemble.

What you can do as a teacher: Tread lightly and start a lesson like this off by making other students aware of the fact we do not all know our genetic heritage. A good idea is to pick someone famous, whose history you are happy of, and then get the students to study the genetics and family heritage of that person, instead of their own.

  • Mother's Day and Father's Day

Teachers need to be aware that adopted kids might still have a relationship with their birth parents as well as their adoptive ones, making it necessary to make more than one celebratory card or gift. Not knowing this information could lead to an awkward moment, especially for the child.

What you can do as a teacher: Every teacher should get to know their student on a somewhat personal level and should have frequent meetings with the parents. While the parents are not entitle to give you all of the information behind their child's adoption, it's a healthy practice that they do mention it to you in confidence.

  • Adopt-A-Projects

This task is becoming quite popular in schools already While it is an amzing initiative, it’s possible that it could cause confusion and for some. The idea here is that a class as a whole or each member of the class is encouraged to adopt something, where they then raise money for what it is they have adopted or donate time towards it each week. Examples are causes such as "adopt a dolphin", "adopt a park", "adopt a charity". For concrete thinkers, this might not make sense. They might not understand or even be hurt by the difference in "adopting a child" and adoption as an act in showing support to something, or paying money towards it!

What you can do as a teacher: All you need to do in this instance is change your wording. Refer to the subject as something you are "supporting" or "aiding" rather than adopting. As fun as the idea of "adopting" something might seem to you or the other students.

Adoption is a beautiful thing but if it is not nourished correctly and accepted as a culture that is still finding its feet, it can cause strain to those who are adopted as well as adoptive parents and even birth parents. Because more and more families are growing through adoption, it is worthwhile to keep the process of adoption in mind when planning all lessons and class activities. 

Much love - @sweetpea

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Phew. You sometimes don't think about how these things can have such a big impact.

I have been married now for 7 years and have become a son richer. Before we got married, my wife was a single mother with her son not knowing his biological father and paternal family at all. He only met his father when he was 18 on his request. My wife often tells me how she dreaded a lot of the same things you have highlighted above when it came to her son. Like the family tree, fathers day, etc.

So I think what you are proposing here is relevant for more than just adoption and should definitely be applied in schools.

Thank you for a great post!

Teaching is not easy as most people think, sometime I see teaching as a talent given to a few. Thanks for this post it is really informative

I Agree Great Great Comment!

This is beautifully written and a very important post. I hope many will read it and that has not been a thought I have had often here on Steemit.

Adoption is a very special thing that we all experience when we are adopted into God's family. It is at the centre of what He does daily with people and we should all understand the experience of adopting and being adopted better. We will understand God's heart better when we do.

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