TIL: The Heartbreak of Being "UNFOLLOWED" on 😢Steemit!💘steemCreated with Sketch.

in #steemit7 years ago (edited)

A sordid, true, Valentine's Day tale of Steemit Heartbreak!

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

Have you ever been "UNFOLLOW"ed on Steemit? How's that workin' out for ya'?
It hurts, doesn't it?

"Why in heaven's name would anyone ever want to unfollow me?" You're probably asking yourself that question...

St. Valentine's Day

St. Valentine's Day
Photo courtesy of Laura Ockel and http://unsplash.com

Let me tell you my true story of heartbreak and loss...

Valentine's Day was just hours away... At first, I wasn't sure... Did I really see my "followers" count dip? Wait, it's back now... Hmmm... Oh, no! It's gone down again! What's happening?

Uh-oh... Could someone have actually read my "Five Sure-Fire Ways to Bomb Out on Steemit?" It has been just about a week now...

Fortunately, I had just dropped by @mattclarke's blog and came across his "Follower loyalty - A new metric for a new year." In Matt's article, I learned how to check my followers, how to see just who might have dropped me.

So, I did a quick investigation. I was both surprised and distressed at what turned up...

There were one or two sort of "nobodies" - Steemians who may be just "placeholder" accounts, not very active on the platform. I wasn't really that worried about them.

I noticed a couple who appeared to have unfollowed me at some point - and then re-followed later on. Maybe an accident? Who knows, and who cares? They're back...

But then, there was one follower in particular who seemed to have unfollowed, refollowed, rinse and repeat, and had just unfollowed again... And, this was someone I considered one of my more faithful readers! Someone who left frequent, encouraging comments! Good grief, a follower who I'd be darned if I wanted to lose! 😢 I was heartbroken.

Had I somehow offended?

Not being one to sweep things under the rug,

I contacted my faithful follower. I'm ever so glad that I did!

As it turns out, when you "Mute" someone you Follow, Steemit may do an "Unfollow" that stays in effect until you "Unmute" that account. My follower had been managing "reader overload" with the Mute button, and had no intention of permanently unfollowing me. I was relieved and thankful that I had not inadvertently offended someone I respect.


And so, Dear Reader, what's the moral of the story?

If you happen to notice that your "follower" count has dropped, don't take it too seriously. Most importantly, don't jump to conclusions and don't take any rash action — especially not a "revenge unfollow."

Give your followers every benefit of the doubt.

Save your energy for writing more great posts.


~FIN~


Thanks for your time and attention.
I wouldn't be here on Steemit if it weren't for you, my readers!
I have very eclectic interests and hope, over time, to write about all of them.


⬇️To Check Out @creatr's World⬇️CLICK Each Image Below⬇️

@creatr @creatr @creatr
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I never thought to check my follower numbers.

Now I'm wondering if they have gone up or down and I didn't notice.

Oh, well not to worry. my view is that if someone unfollows me, that leaves more room for others to follow me.

It is interesting how the 'mute' button works though. So thanks for pointing that out.

Thank you for reading and commenting!

You can satisfy your "wondering" quite easily... Read Matt's article, and use his simple instructions to check the database... as I understand it, what is revealed there is a complete, historical list of every account that has followed you and unfollowed you, and every time that has occurred. Pretty interesting!

I watch my followers on Steemdb. I know my follower figure everyday, It's really important to me. Try not to let it hurt if one of them leaves, there are all kinds of reasons someone may unfollow. And like the prodigal son they may one day return!

Thank you, @opheliafu, for stopping by and sharing such kind thoughts. Yes, indeed, the prodigal son... :) There's something in that lesson for all of us! :)

Thanks for the mention, @creatr
It can feel confronting, but you'll never be everybody's cup of tea, particularly if you're saying controversial stuff.
If they're legitimate unfollows, just be glad for the time you had together :)

Hello, my friend!

So nice of you to stop by and say "Hey," and you're always more than welcome for any mention... I appreciate you and your thoughtful articles.

I've wondered if you're more into curation these days? It has surprised me how long it's been since your last post... It did, however, make it easy to find! ;)

I hope all is well?

My heart's still here, although my head has been elsewhere this year.
I'll be posting again in the next couple of days, and I really appreciate the encouragement.

I need to move my head and get more work done... ;)

Looking forward to your next post! :)

a little while ago someone I respect and admire deleted her entire follower list and started over. She figured that when she first came on steemit she blindly followed a lot of people but she wanted people in her feed that she really wanted to follow. I was deleted, then re-instated. Okay, I actually DM'd her and begged her not to delete me LOL Turns out she didn't. We never know the reasons behind someone leaving steemit or unfollowing us. I used to agonize over that on Twitter until I made up my mind to produce the best content I could. Sure enough, I got to the point where I have celebrities and Hollywood stars following me but I have so many followers I don't even realize they're there. The moral of the story? As Atticus said in TKAM - do your duty. do your best. The rest will take care of itself. I will never unfollow you, my friend :)

Thank you, my good friend John... :)

But, what if I publish some really hard to swallow content? I fully expect, as time goes on, to present some viewpoints that may be "hard to hear," that are so far from "mainstream" that they may, at least on the surface, appear heretical?

Of course, preemptively frightening you off is the last thing I would ever wish to do... I just want you to be prepared, and to know that the thoughts I present here are, to the extent humanly possible within myself, governed by my absolute reverence for Jesus-God and His Word.

Thank you for being my friend.

I hear you, creatr, but I've been friends with people of opposite views all through my life - hell, I'm conflicted myself. My days of being the church police are over - riding around in a squad car with a blue gumball machine on top - putting out fires...yeah, I actually was a Bible answer man without holding the mic. I was a lot of things, but now I'm tolerant and love people who follow their heart. I suppose that's why we're friends. Just stay sincere and I don't care if sometimes you're sincerely wrong. I'm wrong more than right and I certainly fall more than seven times a day LOL!!

Even so, I hope you'll put up "the good fight" if you do conclude that I'm wrong about something? ;) I believe that's why God urges us to "not forsake the assembling of yourselves together," so that we can provide one another with effective, loving feedback. :)

BTW, a caveat - Watch those click-bait posts ha ha - other people aren't so broad-minded :)
Yeah, I still laugh at that LOL!!

Oh, yeah... I've suffered from "click-bait road rash" before... but thanks for the reminder! ;)

This post has been ranked within the top 50 most undervalued posts in the first half of Feb 14. We estimate that this post is undervalued by $6.53 as compared to a scenario in which every voter had an equal say.

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Thanks, as always, for noticing! ;)

Thank you for posting @creatr.

Very good advice. Shakespeare has a line regarding this dilema....just need to find it. ^_^

All the best. Cheers.

I look forward to hearing about Shakespeare's line when you do, Thank You! :)

Hey @creatr - have you tried out the Dead Followers link? It's pretty cool.
Considering I recently hit 700, I was curious to see how many were "dead". Turns out there are nearly 300 zombies.
Anyway, it's kind of a fun number to look at. Here's the link.

Hey, @merej99, Thanks for that link.

Actually, I had seen that before. Be sure you are careful using it, though? Probably the most significant thing is how long since the last vote...

It is interesting. But, what if they're readers? I wish there were a way to tell. The only real way I can tell that characteristic, which is to me the most important one, is by who talks to me in the comments. ;)

Thanks for stopping by! :)

"I Frank will NOT unfollow anyone!"

Steem on,
Frank

Thanks for Steeming by! ;)

Looking at your follower history, I immediately spotted who you're talking about haha There could be a number of reasons that you were unfollowed. It could be that you're not leaving comment on his posts and just reply to his comments on your posts, or you've been posting stuff that he's not comfortable with, among many other reasons.

You've come to a great conclusion though. Don't stress out over it. Once you get through that initial shock, think about your recent interaction with that person. If you haven't been paying attention to his posts either, then it's a acceptable casualty. However, if you've been actively engaging with each other (i.e. both of you comment on each other's posts every single time), then you've established a relatively close relationship where you're allowed to ask why he's constantly unfollowing you.

Steemit is such an interesting platform, allowing almost complete transparency into everything here.

The reality is that I have been able to communicate my concerns to my follower and have been reassured that all is well. My main concern was to ensure that I had not carelessly and inadvertently offended someone for no good reason.

As the saying goes, "All's well that ends well," and this has ended well. :)

In that regard, sometimes it just can't be helped. We can't please everyone, so we just have to do our best to keep all the loyal ones. Personally, I have a tendency to unfollow people who don't follow me after numerous interactions, that's why I make it a point to only follow who actively engage on my posts. Since I comment back to people who support me, that shouldn't really be a problem.

Here I am discussing unfollows when I couldn't even get people to follow me in the first place hahaha

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