Dealing With My External and Internal Critics
I watched with interest the infamous Logan Paul drama after he posted a Youtube video of him and his crew stumbled upon a corpse of a man who committed suicide at Aokigahara Forest, Japan. Someone on Facebook posted that video on her feed and I watched it. Prior to that video I never heard of Logan Paul and had no idea who he was. However, Logan was heavily criticized due to its viewers deeming it offensive and disrespectful towards the deceased and his family.
I was shocked when I watched it because I thought it was just a joke but apparently it was not. They even filmed the corpse up close (with the face blurred out). Maybe it was just their nervous reactions of stumbling upon it but they did laugh as if it was a big prank. It was disgusting. I agree with all those criticisms he received. Logan was foolish to post that insensitive video. It has been deleted though and YouTube even issued an apology. Logan wrote a written apology and made a video to apologize. You can watch it below.
So what does this has to do with my painting?
Criticism and dealing with it.
As an artist, there will always someone out there who won't like my art. When I share my art on social medias like Steemit, anyone can give their opinion. I can't avoid that because it's fair game out there. Everyone is entitled to his/her opinion. It could be positive or negative and I can't please everyone. Some people will like what I do, some don't. I had people commented to me that they dislike my art, said it's tacky and tasteless. It hurts of course but it's just their opinions. If you don't like it, move along to the things you like, don't waste your time on me.
Personally, I think external critics are easy to deal with. I am an avoider by nature and I am VERY GOOD at ignoring people. So if I receive negative comments, I just ignore them and not respond. But what about my inner critic? How do I ignore my inner critic? How can I ignore myself?
"You are your own worst critic."
That's true. I can be hypercritical on myself. I would over analyze a so-called bad painting to the point that I want to re-do the same piece and get it "perfect". Sometimes I draw an artwork and I couldn't get it right so I re-do it over and over again. This is especially true for watercolor paintings because watercolor is an unpredictable medium. You can't really control the outcome. And being a hypercritical person this is very frustrating.
However as I learned to use it more and more in my work, I finally accept that there are things that I can't control, even my own artwork. I have to trust the medium to do the magic for me. And most of the time I am often surprised with the outcome. Even when it is messy it is still a beautiful mess, imperfect and original.
And sometimes people would come to me and said that messy art is stunning and breathtaking. Seriously?
As someone who has a dominant defectiveness schema, I find it's hard to take such compliments. But overanalyzing the compliments I am actually jeopardizing myself. What kind of vibes am I sending out to people? That I am undeserving of any compliments for creating something I am passionate about? Why am I betraying myself?
As I grow older I learned to be kinder to myself. I don't listen much to my inner critic anymore and in return, I become less critical of myself and others.
The painting
Though the woman in this painting is not me but her actions - holding her head and screaming in frustration - show how I would react when dealing with my inner critics.
Medium: watercolor on paper
Here are the progress photos...
...and here is the completed painting!
Thank you for visiting! How do you deal with criticism? Please leave your comments below.
My previous posts:
The Way We Cope - The Lost Boys Painting #3
Trees And A City On Her Head - Steem Cartoon Wo-Owl Challenge #1
Night Owl And Bouncing Marbles
I Am Not Good Enough - The Lost Boys Painting Series
Lost Boys And My Inspirations - A Painting Series
I am selling some of my paintings over on Artfinder. Shipping is FREE worldwide. You can check them out here: ARTFINDER. Thank you!
My avatar was illustrated by @pinstory
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Great painting! However, I think there are some who use the "f the haters my art is great" to an extreme...(such as Logan Paul) I think there is a case to be made where art is actually very offensive to a majority of people, not just in execution but in intent, and the artist has a duty to listen, learn, and even apologize. I personally just learned about the RCDart fiasco, an artist criticized for fetishizing the trans community and depicting racist caricatures. While some still support the artist, if a community feels so strongly offended, it's worth a listen and even an apology, which the artist has yet to do.
I agree @corinneiskorean . As artists, we have the responsibility to be mindful of the message we carry. If we share our art with the public, we have to think of what kind of message we want to impart. We are not to be self-absorbed and do as we please, though it's very common to see people practice that. Personally, for me, I do not touch on sensitive issues (racism, religion, LGBT)unless I can depict them in a positive light. But some people don't care and maybe they do it intentionally to provoke, to create division and of course to seek fame and make money. And for me, that's not a good thing.
That's A great art my friend ..Actually this post is nicely done....Thanks for sharing ..
Thank ypu @nnajmull
They are codependent because the internal critics are subjective and you need external critics to analyze your actions objectively. Somehow the truth is somewhere between ^^. Great post anyways, keep up the good work @coloringiship .
Thank you @chronicle . Yes you are right. We need them both :)
Nice one, love the watercolour blends ^^
Thank you dear @ellyn-suraya 😊
great art style.. may I know,what brands of watercolor that you use it ..
Thank you @aurah ...I use Artists Alpha Watercolor. I hope to upgrade to better brands like Windsor Newton or Daler Rowney.
https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@hilmerwhite/hello-steemit-i-tell-you-about-my-life
Thank you for visiting @hilmerwhite and welcome to Steemit. However kindly please do not spam anyone's post with your link dropping. That practice is frown upon in Steemit. You can get flagged and you don't want that.
Great Artwork!!! Keep moving forward!
Thank you @louisloke :)
Comments from parents and close friends are really hard to accept maybe we longed for their acceptance and, or we expected that they will accept who and what we are...
That is right @jerrywjl . We are social beings and deep within our core, we all long for acceptance and validation.
I love your painting ... and well ... criticism does not matter, for those who criticize have a very empty life.
Thank you @cthkrn ...I don't mind constructive criticism. I just hate the ones that aim to be hurtful. One can disagree without aiming low.