Bodybuilding & Dating? - How my perception of men and attraction changed | Don't date a guy who has smaller arms than you;)
The other day I posted a picture on Instagram with the caption ‘Don’t date a guy who has smaller arms than you’. It was rather a fun thing to say and some of the comments were hilarious. One guy commented:
‘If my girl had bigger arms than me I don’t know if I’d be scared or turned on lol’
This post made me think about my perception of men, and what I consider attractive.
But let’s start with the reactions I get when it comes to my body. I have never been a small girl. I was always the sporty power girl, also back in the days when I was a handball player.
When I started my fitness journey, lifting weights and growing more muscles, I got to hear the usual things every weight-lifting girl is tired of…
‘Don’t get too big’ – ‘Too many muscles are not feminine’ and so on…
The fun thing is, it is usually the small guys saying this. I found this very suitable quote:
’When women with muscles look like men… Do men without muscles look like women?!’
The thing is, I don’t care if you lift weights or not. If you look like the next Arnold Schwarzenegger, or if you are skinny, fat, chubby,… your choice. When you are a nice person, and I like you, then we can be friends. I don’t choose my friends according to their looks.
I like beautiful people and I don’t care what they look like.
That being said, it is my choice what I want to look like. And it is your own choice to decide what you want to look like. I don’t force you to like the same things as I do. Friendship is not about the looks.
But it is also my call to define what I think is attractive, with regard to my own body, but also when it comes to others.
So this brings us back to the dating part:
The bigger I get, the more muscles I grow, the more attracted I get to men who also have a considerable amount of muscles.
This has two reasons:
- I know how time-consuming it is to build a muscular physique. It is a lifestyle, which comes with a lot of training and dietary restrictions. In the past, I had to justify my lifestyle to the people in my life. I even felt bad when I said that I would rather go to the gym than to a bar, or when I did not want to eat certain things. I am done with that.
Working out is fun for me.
Planning my diet is fun for me.
Eating according to my goals is fun for me.
Thus, the man on my side should have a similar mindset when it comes to sports and nutrition, because it is such a big and fun part of my life.
- I am a woman and I want to feel feminine. And I don’t, when a man is smaller or weaker than me - or rather: less determined when it comes to fitness, weightlifting or bodybuilding. Sorry, if this sounds weird, I don’t care about looks when it comes to friendship, but when we are actually talking about a relationship, I need to know that we are supporting and pushing each other, following the same lifestyle. I need to feel comfortable – mentally and physically - so…
...your arms should be bigger than mine ;)
Looking forward to hearing your opinions on this ☺
xx Catie
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Background picture at the courtesy of www.pixabay.com // Fitness pictures by myself
@catieleta - Interested article. I'm sure that post on Instagram definitely break few hearts!! 😂
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😅 breaking hearts is my business lol. just kidding. thanks so much. xx
You are wise to gravitate to men who follow close to your goals of health and fitness. I give you credit.
thank you. I just noticed in the past that it is not working out in the longterm when your habits differ too much.
I wholeheartedly agree. Best to gravitate towards like-minded people. 💕
I love this take. People can get too caught up about the end result in this stuff. They may assume, "You like guys with big muscles because you are stuck on how it looks." This isn't the main reason.
You like that it represents a great work ethic and a focus on fitness. You appreciate how much dedication it takes. It only makes sense that you would be attracted to something you're interested in also.
I think it's cool that you would only date a guy with arms bigger than you. I've never heard it explained like this, but I like it.
Cheers. Thanks for the interesting thought.
happy to see that you understand my intention. I am not a superficial person, not at all, but as @wandrnrose7 says it right: I am looking for a light-minded person. No wait, I am actually not looking for anything at all ;) those who don't search, will find. thanks for stopping by and reading
great content!