We have a winner! SLAP-THE-SPAMMER-CONTEST

The first SLAP-THE-SPAMMER contest was truly a success. The aim was simple: how to respond to spammers in an original yet effective manner. With 16 responses from all around the Steem world, @diebitch and myself would like to thank everyone for their participation.

Without these original Steemians, Steem would be a much less beautiful place!
@horzymandias, @ahmadmanga, @tinypaleokitchen, @barbaarseevelien, @practicalthought, @mjm3101, @the-maker, @demonsthenes, @firststeps, @clayboyn, @pjay96, @jayna, @professorhobo, @sabas and @roydestory.

The Winner

But now of course, we need to let you know about the winner. Although there were several spamilious responses, the jury has decided to select @jayna as the winner of the SLAP-THE-SPAMMER contest. Jayna wrote a lengthy analysis of the spam, which I would like to repeat here for you all, as it may inspire us all. I have added some editorial notes, in case jayna is interested in refining their spam-reply-technique even further..

This was the original spam that was to be responded to:

The Winning Response by @jayna + Analysis by @nobyeni

My dear Blank40. I was so enthralled with your comment that for a moment I found myself speechless. Did you come up with that all by yourself? How delightfully insightful!

Your enthousiasm is striking, @jayna. So much so, that I wonder if you actually mean it. You write you are speechless but yet you proceed to write a pretty long comment. That is paradoxical, and it doesn't sound very honest. But let's see if you can make me believe that your excitement is not all feigned - I know winning this contest might also have helped you loose sight of credibility. It happens to the best of us.

What is your secret? Perhaps you've been studying some of the great poets who are known for their ability to communicate immense ideas in just a few words.

Here I feel you bring in a lot of creativity and wishful thinking. This says more about you, than about the spammer. Is that really your intention? Consider staying close to the material at hand, have you considered how the spammer may feel, when they cannot recognize themselves in the 'ability to communicate immense ideas'?

In fact, I'd like to examine this further, for the deep, and profound truths that are embedded in your minimalist comment bear further examination.

How is it possible that you say you need to examine something, that you want to examine something further, but you've already decided what the outcome will be--deep and profound truths. This is not a great way to start an investigation. If you already know what you will find, why would you even go looking?

When you said "like," I could only assume you meant "similar to." And yet, upon deeper reflection, I find myself pondering. Could you have meant something else? I paced my house late into the night, in fact, fixated on this one thing. Perhaps you meant, "So," or "Hello there." Is it possible you meant nothing by that at all? Perish the thought!

Here again, a very personal reflection. If this is your style, of course that is fine. Yet what exactly are you saying here? Is this the best way you could have said that? I get the feeling you are letting things slide in this paragraph, I hope you will be more careful about this in the future.

Moving on to "wery," I was amazed anew! This could mean so many things. It's like a little phonetic puzzle. I suppose it's possible that you are an India native, and wrote this word as you might pronounce it. A dictionary gave me an additional clue, explaining that "wery" is simply "eye dialect" for the word "very." So THANK you. I've learning something new today!

Excellent. Praising the material is a very good way to interact with the reader, the spammer in this case. (See also an earlier spam tutorial on this topic.) Good that you focus on your own experience with the spam, how it effected you. This is very effective - which was one of the criteria of the contest.

And finally, let's look at "good post." This little aphorism took my breath away. Your brevity is remarkable. I'm truly enthralled by your ability to communicate this incredibly deep thought so succinctly. Kudos, my friend.

Here I would like to point you to this article written by @tinypaleokitchen where she explains why the use of adverbs is generally not a good idea. I'd really recommend you go and have a look at it, it might help you to improve this paragraph.

Oh, and thank you for the link. Shameless self-promotion is always highly valued, and putting your completely unrelated link in a comment on my post of course means I will immediately go visit, upvote, and resteem your wonderful content. And naturally, I will follow you and suggest all of my friends do the same. I can't wait to see what you will come up with next!

I'm not sure what you mean here. (People who have read the latest spam tutorial will recognize an excellent use of the 'philosophical turn' here.) If you de believe that putting your own link works so well, why haven't you done so yourself?

Brilliant... just brilliant. If only I could learn to do what you do.

I'm not completely convinced you actually mean this. Your ability to learn from the input of the spammer and turning it into a transformative experience, tells me that you actually have a lot of abilities. Therefore I would like to encourage you to trust yourself more, and to continue learning. Where-ever it may lead you.

@jayna, to support you in your learning curve, hopefully the 1 SBD prize money will come in handy.

Thank you, Steemians, for your continued support

In case there is a clear need, @diebitch and myself will contemplate holding another spamilious contest.