LiTTLE CHERiNE Book 01 - post197
She stared at me and her eyes filled with tears. “Oh Robert, how could you!?” She left me and this time I had nothing to say. For the moment anyway.
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Pavlo is not a stupid boy. When we put him in the spare room his thoughts were obvious. I sent the girls away and sat on his bed. This was going to be difficult to say in Greek. “Pavlo, how old are you now, about twelve?”
“Nearly thirteen.”
“Nearly a teenager! Since the accident you have certainly grown.” I was silent for a while. “Pavlo, how much do you know about sex. Have your parents talked to you?”
He was shocked at the idea. “No, but my friends told me all about it.”
“Not good! Friends are the worst advisors. There are two sides to learning about sex. The first you need to learn is the anatomy and the mechanics. I have a doctor friend who can explain it to you. The other side of sex is the emotional. That I am an expert at - you learn to not do everything I do and you will have a good life.”
*You tell him you were joking or else I’ll come in there.*
*Am I Dommi?* Because of the way I was feeling about being coerced by Cherine, she did not reply.
“Just kidding a bit. What I really wanted to talk about is what you are going through right now. After we go dancing we feel an urgent need to hold someone and to make love. You are alone which will make it difficult for you. It just happens I have something here that might help you.”
I pulled a drawer open, rummaged underneath and pulled out a magazine. As I flipped through the pages for him to see what the contents are, I reassured him, “Here you are. No need to blush Pavlo. You will have to masturbate once you are alone, so why not have a bit of help, a few pictures to stimulate your imagination. Jesus! Don’t tell me you have been made to believe masturbating is bad!” I gave him a moment. “It is not bad. Everyone does; your friends, your father, maybe even your grandfather. You have your own bathroom so no one will know. But do try to get some sleep.”
“But what about Maria-Elena?”
“You forget about her Pavlo, she still belongs to her family. I hope you were not getting any ideas of making love to her!” I grinned. “Find yourself a girl, someone you can love so that she can dance with you next time.”
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As I walked into the bedroom the girls booed me. Rosie asked, “Robert, how come you have a porno magazine? Why didn’t you show us?”
“It is not a porno magazine, it just has a few pictures of nude women. I got it because I was curious.”
“Curious!” Rosie, that not always so sweet daughter, put her hands on her hips theatrically. “Curious about what? Don’t you know what a woman looks like? You want me to show you?”
I laughed, but replied seriously, “With all the joking about me and you little girls, I wanted to see if photos of grown women give me an erection.”
“Did they?”
“That is for me to know. You wait until you grow up to find out.”
Cherine was not paying much attention, her worry about her friend Pavlo was occupying her mind. “You really hashed that one up, all you did is embarrass him. You were not of much help to Pavlo. You really squashed him flat!”
“I’m not comfortable talking with boys about…” I realised Maria-Elena was also avidly listening. Time to face the music. I did not have to wonder why she was already in our bed, not with the way the girls were emoting.
Cherine did not wait for me to speak and asked sweetly, “Would you rather spend the night with Pavlo?”
“Dommi, I don’t know what I would rather do. I do know I do not like what you girls arranged. Does she understand what this is all about?”
“You think we would let you rape her?”
If Dommi was supporting Cherine on this, then I knew I would make no headway with this bunch so I sat by Em-e. “They love you and are getting carried away by that. Today was a very big day, your whole family are now safe, even if any of you die you will carry on living. I think the important thing is that you came as a family. Sweetheart, I am certain your parents will want you in their circle. What the girls want you to do tonight, as much as I would love to, would be wrong. We would be betraying your parents.”
“I don’t want to be in a circle with my mum and dad. I think it is uggh to make love with them.”
“It is only fair Robbie. If she doesn’t want to, why should she be forced to. It was the same with me, except it was my dad who did not want to.”
“Meli, it is not the same thing. With your dad we waited for him to understand and give us his blessing. In this case, the parents do not understand yet. They thought they were leaving their little girl to play and sleep over with her friend. If they should find out tomorrow we had sex, they would be justifiably angry and hurt. It could also turn them against developing their own circle.”
“But Robbie we…”
“There are no buts! Cherine, you started this, you grab some sheets and pillows. You keep your friend company until one of the girls takes your place.”
Em-e looked afraid, but I saw a steely determination in her eyes; it fascinated me to see this in her. “I’m not going! If you do not make love to me tonight, then you never will. I will be alone.”
She clutched the sheet that covered her in her little fists, holding it to her. Cherine gently put her hands over her friends’ - to make her release the sheet and leave I thought. Cherine, as she did this, turned to me. “She even had one of your no-soap showers to smell nice for you.” Even as she spoke she pulled down the sheet and there was this sweet girl totally nude, directly under my eyes. I was already on fire with lust from the dancing, so I thought as I stared down at this lovely girl, ‘how can anyone say no to her’.
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“Cherine!”
“How can you hurt her Robert. She is so sweet and she is my best friend.”
I knew she was appealing to the protector in me, using the word ‘hurt’ to manipulate me and I could feel it was working. I did sort of love this little girl, as a friend of Cherine’s, but that was being kicked over by not only her sweetness and sex appeal, but by my desperate need to never hurt a child (I can just imagine what the response to this comment would be if an anti-pedophile reads it; they will, I imagine, be very upset that I excuse my having sex with a child by claiming I did so, so as to avoid hurting her - what can I do, the truth is the truth and she no longer is a child, not in that sense, the void does that to us). I felt the love in her, her need to be loved by me.
“It is not right.” Even as I weakly answered her, my eyes remained glued to her perfect little body and my hand touched softly the smooth soft warm skin of her belly. Maria-Elena took hold of my hand and pulled at me so that I leant over her, and she kissed it. I shivered as I opened to her. “You girls are very unfair. You know that after dancing I have difficulty in controlling myself, that I think with the wrong head. I’m going to have to make sure you do not make any more friends from now on.”
Cherine stood on the bed and wrapped her arms around me. She kissed me. “I love you Robert, you are the nicest man in the world.” She turned to Maria-Elena. “The only one we needed to love you for you to be part of us was Robert. He does love you.”
I felt it too, Em-e was now part of us. We had all felt the circle snap as it expanded to include her. I felt the strong flow of love that she sent us and our return that was multiplied tenfold. I was overwhelmed by the growth of love and yet I also grieved deep within me at the way this had happened. There was no point in fighting it anymore, as far as I know, what happened is irreversible, she is part of us now. God save us from her father, I thought.
“You were shameless in the way you manipulated me Cherine. Oh my loves, how do I face them tomorrow, how do I look them in the eyes?”
“Feel it Robert, I sent this love we feel for her daughter to Percy. Feel her answer.” I felt the joy and love she sent us. There was also a tinge of sadness, as if she felt she were losing her too. Cherine sent to her the qualms I had about taking their daughter into our circle, away from them (her sending, in this case, was more like telepathy, which distracted me for a moment, for I was overjoyed to know she is growing stronger). She responded with warmth and a sly humour at my inability to say no to a beautiful girl. She sent to Cherine a soothing promise that she would make it right with her husband.
I stared in wonder at my new family member. I had been fond of her from the days of our flat, when she played with Cherine. I remembered how she would whisper and giggle and get Cherine to laugh. How grateful I had been to this little pixie who was able to make my Cherine play and be happy. (I’m pleased that when I look back, I do not find even a hint of my being interested in her sexually - I do not mind it if I first love the child, but without love, it would be ugly.) It had not been difficult for that fondness to grow into love, not with Cherine loving her so much. It did surprise me, I had the thought, that the other girls loved her, Dommi and especially Claudia.
Claudia turned my face to her with a firm but trembling hand. Her eyes had flooded with unshed tears. “How can you love me if you truly think I am a hard person?”
“Oh god! I’m so sorry my love. I do not know why I thought that. I think it was more fear that you would be jealous. It was stupid.”
Before I could do or say anything more, Dommi reacted. “Roberto, you stop that this instant. You said you were sorry, it is enough. Claudia, he was right to feel that way. You cannot see that his worry was because he loves you? If you want the truth, we all feel that way. We can feel a hardness in you that none of us have. You always want things to be done your way and you do not fully open up to us the way we open to you. Why do you always hold back a part of yourself and then feel hurt when we worry that you do not love us as we love you?”
The dismay on her face, the pain in her eyes showed she saw this as a total catastrophe, a rejection, almost something she had expected, feared. The protector felt her pain but was powerless to intervene. I quickly enfolded her within my arms so that she understands she is not being rejected.
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“That is the Scandinavian in her Dommi. You are Greek, you are used to showing your emotions, her upbringing was more reserved. There is no hardness in this heart; my heart has been a part of it and I know. She loves all of us with all her being, just as we love her. Her heart is a flower which is slowly unfolding its petals. One day soon it will have opened fully and we will all be blessed by the beauty we find waiting in there for us.”
For those readers who have not understood, when they speak using telepathy, what they say is enclosed within stars, and the thoughts exchanged are in italic.
e.g *Hi, I bet you are wishing you could read thoughts.*?
Αλέξανδρος Ζήνον Ευσταθίου
(Alexander Zenon Eustace)9th August, 2018
* posted on Steemit: 9th August, 2018
ζήλεψε λίγο η Claoudia η μου φαίνεται..
με τον Παύλο μπερδεύτηκα λίγο... θέλει μπεί στον κύκλο τους;;
Ohi. Den ekame timpota i kaimeni. Aplos tis eipe i Dommi oti einai i moni, apo tois kopelles, pou den anoigei tin kardia tis entelos, panta krataei mia gonia ga ton eafto tis.
I Claudia panta eihe to fovo oti isos na min tin agapane oso fainetai (afto einai mono o fovos tis, ohi pragmatikotita) kai aisthanthike oti afto pou eipe i Dommi apodykniei oti eihe dikio, den tin agapane.
O Robert to katalave kai giafto tin yperaspistike kai tous eipe oti otan anoiksi entelos i kardia tis, tha tous kanei ekpliksi to poso agapaei.
Tha hreiasti o Robert na tis ksana-milisi gia to idio thema, alla afti tin fora tha einai ligo pio 'alithinos/praktikos' kai afto tha tin voithisi na allaksi - na pistepsi entelos stin agapi tous.
EDIT
Ksehasa na apantiso gia ton Παύλο
Olloi pou ehoun ginei 'linked apo tin Cherine kai ehoun paei sto void, kseroun oti kai na pethanoune, den tha mporesei to void na tous steilei stin epomeni zoi tous, epeidi o Protector tou Robert, i, i Cherine, that tous aisthanthi sto void kai tha tous feroun piso.
O Παύλο omos, kai i Em-E, den eihan ginei linked kai gia afto syneheia fovotan i Cherine oti ean pethanoun horis na einai paron, den tha to kserei gia na tous sosei. Aftos einai o logos pou tous kalese sto party, gia na zorisi ton Robert na tous dehti kai na tous paroun sto void.
To provlima me ton Παύλο, kai o logos pou den ithele o Robert na ton pari sto void kai na ton kanoun linked, einai epeidi zi me tous goneis tou kai epeidi, san agori, den mpori na gini melos tis oikogeneias tous, tha ypoferei ean einai monos tou, omos i Cherine apofasise oti kalitera to na yproferei, para na riskaroun na ton hasoun gia panta.
Vlepo oti to SP ehei pesei poli, tora einai $1.07
Tora, ean ginotan i douleia kai mporousa, tha agoraza...
ki egw an eixa xrimata tha agoraza... :(