If it helps to hear it from the outside - You're a brave, beautiful person. I know it's hard and scary. And you're doing the right thing.
Tools:

• Tapping ( but you already know that)
• Ho'oponopono
• Listening to Eckhart Tolle reading his own books - I love the sense of humour and compassion he brings to the recognition of the human condition
• Having someone on SteemitChat you can talk to in the middle of the night when all your friends are asleep (eg someone in New Zealand who will be up and about, and on her computer a lot of the day)
  You've got this, I know you do.