Why do People..Lie (WDP Series by Unshakeable #1)

After putting a lot of work in this new-post series I am extremely excited  to present you the first post called : Why do People..Lie 

Lying what an awful habit,right? Telling the truth always sets you free.Or doesn’t it?

In order to understand the cause of why people lie, firstly we need to answer the following question .Why do people communicate?

People try to contact others to get entertained,persuaded,informed and most importantly connected to other human beings.

The evolutionary biologist Karl Bergstrom once said that if we can communicate,we can manipulate and lying is manipulative communication by not telling the truth.

Sometimes we lie and we don’t even know it.It’s because somebody lied to us in the first place or we believed in things even if they weren’t true.

It’s within the human nature that we try as much as possible to achieve the greatest results with the least effort possible.So,if an opportunity presents itself where we can get bailed  out from a difficult situation just by not telling the truth then most of the times we won’t hesitate to lie in order to achieve a successful outcome.

But let’s start over.

Did you know that in a 10 minute conversation with a stranger , we humans will tell an average of three lies.

According to some researches we start lying as early as six months old.

When children are younger they believe they are constantly being watched by their parents,who they see as authority figures.So for this reason,they’re considerably more inclined to always tell the truth,but as we get older we start experimenting with not always telling the truth.

Studies show the average 4-year-old will tell a lie once every 2 hours.

Another interesting fact is that scientists, a few years ago,found evidence of lying elsewhere in the animal kingdom.Koko the Gorilla who was able to understand sing language once ripped a steel sink out of the wall.When her handlers confronted her about it,she signed ‘’the cat did it’’.

But why do we have to lie?Is it cause of fear?Is it cause of pleasure?

What are the main reasons we are driven to lie again and again everyday?

For humans, successful social interaction is key to success in much of our lives.The ability to lie,and to detect a lie,became pretty important to early humans because lying is actually not very easy for a brain to do and it actually caused a bit of an evolutionary arms race.

People started to get better and better at lying,and better liars got better stuff while those who were good at detecting lies were cheated on by their mates and screwed over in trades a lot less often.

On the following list we find the most important reasons why people lie

1. Take what is not rightfully theirs
2. Inflict pain
3. To create excitement
4. To pacify or appease others
5. To get rewards
6. To avoid punishment
7. To get attention
8. To get sympathy – ‘’steal ‘’ admiration
9. To test trust

When we talk about lying most of us think that it’s a two-way street.Well,that’s not accurate.Many times we lie to ourselves too.

The trick to lying to ourselves is in holding of two pieces of conflicting information in our head at the same time and paying attention to one, while ignoring the other.

People who are good liars can hold a bunch of conflicting information in their heads all at once,and keep track of it all.

Pathological liars – people who habitually and compulsively lie, cheat and manipulate others.

They are so good at self deception that the moment they are telling their story,they whole-heartdly believe their own lie.Interestingly enough there is an actual difference between the brains of a normal person and the brain of a pathological liar.The difference is in the very front of the brain in a place called prefrontal cortex.

Most neuro-science studies focus on the gray matter of the brain,that’s the material that actually processes information.

However,nearly half our brains is made up of what’s called white matter,which is composed of connective tissues that carry electrical signals from one group of neurons to another.So grey matter is where all the processing happens,and white matter connects the different parts of the brain.

In a study at the University of Southern California,researchers found that pathological liars have about 25 percent more white matter in their prefrontal cortex that the rest of us,suggesting that pathological liars can make a bunch of connections in their brain really fast.

While pathological liars have a surplus of white matter,they also have around 14 percent less gray matter than other people,and gray matter is all where the critical thinking happens.

So the white matter is all like, ‘’I am gonna tell my Gf I used to be a MMA fighter ‘’ and the grey matter’s all ‘’I could tell my Gf I used to be a MMA fighter,but I probably shouldn’t because that would jeopardize my relationship with my mother ‘’

Body Language

Our body emits certain signals and symptoms when we lie,which we can’t control most of the times.

• Change in breathing,when a person lies they start to breath heavier,their shoulders rise and their voice gets shallow.
•  Stand still,almost appearing frozen in place
• Change of head position quickly right before the person is expected to respond to a question.
• Provide way too much information,believing that if they talk a lot and be completely open with you,you are more often to believe their story.
• Close their mouth
• Staring into your eyes without blinking

Scientists claim that lies we tell every day often aren’t as successful as we may believe.

In actuality research shows that most people can tell when a person is lying 54% of the time.

In short, we lie because it can bring us many benefits and give us an advantage over ours peers,often without consequence.However,no matter how hard the truth is sometimes we should not try to deny it.As we shall never forget Buddha’s quote ‘’Three things can not be long hidden :The sun,the moon and the truth’’.

The end

by Unshakeable

I really hoped you enjoyed this one as I tried really hard to provide interesting and useful information to all of you out there.Don’t miss tomorrow’s fascinating topic !

Thank you for your time.

Sources 1 2 3 4 5 6 7