No One Should Take Your Faith Away

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I actually found the contest late (five days after posting) and I wasn’t sure if I was going to send in an entry at all. Right now, I wonder if this is an entry or just a spilling of my feelings. What I am going to be taking about is the need for people to hold on to their faith (or in reality, why I should hold on to mine). ‘Faith’ in this piece has nothing to do with the spiritual connotations. Here we go.

The Setting

Humans are bundles of hopes, desires and emotions. I believe everything in an individual life can be traced to these three things. At the very base are the desires, the cravings, the needs, the demands. Some of these desires are obvious and easily met. One is the desire for a meal. It is easy to identify and handle. Other desires such as appreciation and understanding are often subtle and express themselves through indirect ways. One of those ways is through emotions.

There are times when we just find ourselves feeling depressed or excited. These emotions do not just come out of thin air. They are tell-tale signs that certain desires are being met or unduly suppressed. The greatest of these desires is the need for appreciation and understanding. We want to be understood when we take actions and express our thoughts. We also want to be appreciated for who we are. Every time, we act, we either express hope that this need will be met or concede that it never can be met.

Hope is everything. I am typing this with the hope that I can clearly express my thoughts. You are reading this hoping you can identify and understand the message I’m trying to pass across. Without hope, any human endeavour becomes lifeless, a drab without any excitement or expected value. We are not always sure though. Sometimes, we have such great hopes at other times it is a faint flicker that guides us forward.

Understanding and Appreciation

The need for understanding and appreciation cannot be over emphasized. It is at the very foundation of our existence. Understanding, or the lack thereof, can make a lot of difference in human interaction and existence. Understanding in this case doesn't mean total knowledge but a kind of empathy of sorts. It means we can connect with the desires and emotions of another person. We may not fully understand why they act the way they do, but we have a glimpse of their desires and we are ready to indulge (or guide) them.

With understanding comes appreciation. When we seek to understand people, we are indirectly saying they are worth our time. We are ready to explore a part of their lives and probably share ours with them too. With that comes appreciation. We now begin to value them for who they are, warts and virtues. We might not totally agree with them but at least we give them our ‘permission to be who they are and still remain deserving of our attention.

The problem

The problem arises when the people we expect understanding and appreciation do not give it to us. It could be a spouse, sibling, friends, anyone. More often than not, we are in a relationship with those people and have given them a lot of our time and effort. We have invested so much and expect to be valued in return. Instead, we find ourselves feeling misunderstood and unappreciated. I use the verb ‘feel’ because our feelings do not always reflect reality.

In times like that, It is easy to lose faith in ourselves. We began to slowly feel distraught with life. We float in the ebb of depression. At first, we react in anger and try to get some attention for ourselves. Most times, that doesn't work. So we gradually withdraw, hoping that our withdrawal will be noticed and something will change. And if it happens that nothing changes, we gradually drown in our sorrows.

The Alternative

Rather than lose faith in yourself and in your worthiness of being loved, valued, understood and appreciated, consider the following:

1. No one can understand and appreciate you more than you do. You need to think positively of yourself all the times, regardless of what others do or how you feel. You have the power to build up your faith, to encourage yourself. You can decide to give people that power. But ask yourself, why should you give other people the power to make you feel loved and appreciated? Love yourself. Think positively of yourself. Even when you mess up, remember pick yourself up and strive to become better.

2. Never lose hope in humanity. When you feel lost and undervalued, it seems comforting to drink from the cup of self-pity. You tell yourself that it isn't your fault. There is simply no one who can appreciate you. No! That is not the right way to live your life. There are people out there who will value you just as you value yourself. How do you find them? By being the kind of person you want to find. You have the power of positivity to brighten not just your life but the life of others. Express hope in yourself and in others.

3. You desires, and not your decisions will take you to where you want to be. I sincerely believe goals are overrated and desires are grossly underrated. People act based on their desires. It is easy to decide to do something and you find yourself desiring something else. People say you should ignore your desires and stick with your decisions. I believe otherwise. Instead, work with your desires. Remember no one can understand you more than yourself. Work on your needs, work on yourself. Rather than force yourself to achieve goals that don’t align with your desires, try to tune your desires to the things you really want.

Your faith lies in your own hand. You can either hand it over or cultivate it yourself.

This is my entry for the Steemit Power Of Positivity P.O.P organised by @karenmckersie.

I was actually feeling very depressed and writing this piece helped boost my spirit. I was more of preaching to myself.

I hope you gained something. Thanks for reading

Blessings