Poetry Slam Challenge #2: (Freedom's Spark)
I promise this is the last Rhyming Couplet post I will make this week. (Sometimes not so rhyming).
Not only because it is my third entry in this challenge, limited to three entries, but because I am aware that it is a limited and unsophisticated form of poetry. Well, at least my use of it is, but maybe it's what you do with it.
I have enjoyed the theme very much, although it did take me to some dark places. My juvenile attempts, coupled with the heavy themes is an odd juxtaposition for sure. I intentionally tried to lighten the theme with this one.
I've really enjoyed reading the entries. I love that the community is so encouraging and kind.
I did very poorly at school with creative writing. I have ideas in my head but struggle to spell the simplest of words. I spent most of my time doodling pictures in class instead.
I have included my drawings too, it was how I expressed myself when words evaded me.
Technology has helped me develop strategies to over come my deficit, and helped me build confidence.
A phone on my desk at work where I write paper records means I can easily search a word as I write.
Producing anything that remotely resembles a poem has brought me great satisfaction.
Thanks.
Freedom's Spark
Oppression is found in so many places,
I see it projected from millions of faces.
Hiding within I see something else too,
Out of the sorrow springs something born new.
A hint of a glimmer I see in their eyes,
A beautiful shimmer, no money can buy.
A manifestation of pains that are past,
They also exhibit a repose at last.
After the battle, the struggle, the pain,
These faces have retrieved their life force again.
In the retrieval they discover once more,
A freedom that they took for granted before.
I've arrived in this place after paying life's fee,
It's now that I cherish my life that is free.
@girlbeforemirror I'm new to your work, so am thankful for the effective poetry tag. You are a talented poet AND artist! The images you write, and draw, are powerful. Really enjoyed reading your entries. Best wishes!
Thanks for your kind words, and thanks for reading :) And thanks for calling a late night sketch with a sharpie, art.
Hehe, I like your rhyme! But I think the last fee/free is kinda a stretch, esp when it's the end. But keep up the good work :-) (And the drawing is super cool!)
Too much cheese? Yeah I tend to agree with you on that one. I don't take myself too seriously. I appreciate the feedback.
Thanks for reading.
I enjoyed reading your poem, I am also starting to post under the poetry tag. Check out my work and if you like it I would appreciate your follow. More than likely I will follow you back, as I am trying to keep up with all steemit poetry writers. @beginningtoend
I say, if you want to rhyme, do it! I enjoyed this rhyming couplet about seeing freedom bloom in others as well as in your own life. And the sketch is hauntingly magical. Like an image of the cost of freedom, or just after that freedom is realized
Thanks for your response. I have noticed that some people on Steemit are very reactive lately with regards to what they consider substandard poetry.
I'm intrigued by there passionate response. I think this competition has prompted people to have a go who never would have otherwise, which is lovely.
I understand that artists have worked very hard to produce beautiful work, and maybe hacks that smash out something for fun like me really piss them off, but it has actually taught me to really appreciate reading something beautiful rather than devalue it.
I am so much more likely to continue to search for poetry posts, and read the good stuff as a result. That's a win for the true poets here in the long run.
It has amused me though. Visual art is much more widely accepted as art for arts sake. I can scratch out a sketch with a sharpie, and if I call it art no one is offended. Poor grammar or childish rhyming has people seeing red.
It's been fun. Thanks 😁