Sometimes we went for a drive and got searched // stanzas from my Midday WalkssteemCreated with Sketch.

in #poetry2 years ago (edited)

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2nd February 2019

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I found this quite intriguing. You've captured a scene quite well, overloaded with painful allusions to an egregious political situation.

Towards the end of a long-ish life, I've come to the unavoidable conclusion that virtually all forms of human "govern-ment" are quite beastly and destructive of human dignity and peace.

Thanks for writing. Nice to have "met" you on Steemit today.



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I'm very glad too… dear friend. I didn't have much time to explore your library as I met a friend for dinner shortly after reading your poem. I'm looking forward to reading more.

Thanks so much for your careful appreciation. I'm indebted!

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Thanks for this

Well, i had to come to you to read your lates hehe. I read this poem few times, im not sure i fully understood though what is about. Seems too complex for my little brain i believe :^ .

Tks for reading. I tried my best to write something plain and simple this time -- tut-tut, I failed!

It's exactly what it says. A boy and others in a car. Things change, people die. Nothing hidden, so perhaps you're searching too hard -- wait EDIT

Apartrap is a a combination of part of one word - (think, colour-coded locked areas and that should help you) + the word, trap. The faceless driver (of the car or the conversation, it's blurry) is a sort of metaphor for social-political forces. Imbuia is wood used for furniture. Being deployed, has a loaded meaning where I come from, not sure if the poem is very plain and simple after all. HECK 😁

Oh i see, it makes a bit more sense now. You seem very technical and knowledgeable about wording and phrasing. That's interesting; probably you have a lot of experience at composing and laying it out :^. Thanks for sharing. I hope i didn't bothered you with my silly questions :^ .

Glad you can see it a bit more now. And, of course not. It caused me to reflect on my wording which is always a good thing to do. Writing about this topic gives me cause to self-censor quite a bit, so my lines are cryptic. It's something I am trying to shake off, because it doesn't make the lines more universal I think, it just makes them hard to understand for someone from elsewhere. Thanks for the feedback, my friend.


Interesting write, mate.

Made me think of Yeats, "Things fall apart, the center cannot hold."

as plates on top of molten matters always do

Nice line. Molten matters ... wish I had thought of that.


Thank you, my dear friend. I am extremely flattered by your feedback. So much that is beneath the surface is ignored at our peril - that's what I was attempting to convey. The stress, heat and potential for crises.

I struggle to press these short verses out - a singular metaphor like that, well - I still owe you guys a lot more ;-) - I am always in admiration of your poetry which is so much more detailed, well-considered and clear arguments for the issue your poem seeks to address. I feel like mine are pennies into a wishing well. Ah, what the heck. I feel lucky ;-)

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Very thought provoking and melancholic! Just like @oculussensori, I'm not sure I get the exact meaning behind it but damn did it take me for a ride, that unfortunately has to come to end. lol Great read @oneazania!

Thank you for stopping by, Yi Yo.

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