From Stranger To Mother; Reflections on @fisteganos’ 'I Call You Mum'

Sometime yesterday, @fisteganos threw open a challenge in a whatsapp group. He had just published a poem (the poem under review) and asked that people expressed what they felt the poem was all about. You can read the poem and post your comments here.

Many rushed to the poem at once, while I rued the fact that I couldn’t access the internet. Now, I can and now, I will express my thoughts. I didn’t ask for his direct permission but I have a strong feeling that he wouldn't mind. Let me add that I am no medical doctor or psychologist. The thoughts here are crafted along the lines of the poem and not strict medical science.

First the poem

I Call You Mum

In the hands of a stranger I found peace.
In the midst of the chaos she cast a smile
when she saw me.

In the twinkle of an eye I became conscious.
Then I burst into tears,
wondering what I had done to deserve this.

I feel so blessed with you.
you loved me before you knew
if I was ugly or beautiful.

Many times I kicked and played
and it hurt like you would break
but you never wavered in your love for me.

You raised me up, wrapped your hands around me.
I watched the tears journey
down to your cheeks.

I felt amazing, and I cast a smile back
and the whole room went crazy
they were like “oh he smiled back”

Why won’t I? when I found love in your eyes.
After all the pain you went through,
you still found the heart to plant a kiss on me.

A kiss on me
but not a kiss only.
You deserve the world, all bills on me!

From stranger to mother

In the hands of a stranger I found peace.
In the midst of the chaos she cast a smile
when she saw me.

When a child is born, everyone is a stranger to him. He knows no one and (probably) feels alone. He has just been expelled from the comfort of the womb. Every thing looks different. In a few seconds, he finds himself in the arms of someone who is rather excited to have him. In those precious moments, he feels love for the first time.

In the twinkle of an eye I became conscious.
Then I burst into tears,
wondering what I had done to deserve this.

The child suddenly comes alive and notices the warmth and love in the embrace. He cannot explain it but something special is going on. There is a growing bond between the mother and the child. He turns to the only expression of emotions he knows; he begins to cry.

I feel so blessed with you.
you loved me before you knew
if I was ugly or beautiful.

There is a saying in Nigeria, “Monkey no fine but him mama like am.” Loosely translated, it means “A monkey might not be a handsome creature but his mother loves him nonetheless.” I like to think that’s the thought expressed in the above lines. The mother loves and appreciates the child because he is her child, regardless of how handsome (or ugly) he is. This is a blessing as he is loved for who he is.

Many times I kicked and played
and it hurt like you would break
but you never wavered in your love for me.

Children are often wild creatures. They want to explore everything. In so doing, they often hurt their mothers, physically or emotionally. Regardless of the continued hurts, a mother doesn't give up on her child. She looks at him and sees the small innocent boy she held in her arms when she first delivered him. The love still remains and will go on forever.

You raised me up, wrapped your hands around me.
I watched the tears journey
down to your cheeks.

The mother looks at her born child and cries tears of joy. She is so happy to hold her child in her arms. Her living and alive child.

This stanza also speaks of the sacrifices mothers make to ensure their children get the best they can afford. Everything done is to ensure the boy rises to become someone in life. The tears may run down the cheek but it never washes away the love and desire for success that the mother has for her child.

I felt amazing, and I cast a smile back
and the whole room went crazy
they were like “oh he smiled back”

Still while she held him, she smiles at him and he smiles back. Slowly the fear and loneliness melts away, leaving only love - a strong and genuine love. Others notice the smile and are excited. The child is gradually recognizing who his mother is.

Why won’t I? when I found love in your eyes.
After all the pain you went through,
you still found the heart to plant a kiss on me.

The labour pains of a mother always pales in comparison with the joy that comes from holding her child in her arms. The child recognizes this love and smiles. The mother, although weak from childbirth, still finds the strength to show love to her new born child.

A kiss on me
but not a kiss only.
You deserve the world, all bills on me!

There can only be one just reply to the true undying love of a mother; that is lay down everything at her feet. All that the child can ever become, he owes it to his mother. It was his mother who showed him love, not only in affection but also in deeds. From being a stranger, she is now someone he would come to love, respect and cherish. She is now his mother.

Thanks for reading

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Blessings

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