Sunset (Two Poems)

in #poetry6 years ago (edited)

Are you familiar with Stephen King's The Dark Tower series? It's the series he dedicated his life to, and his near-death in a car accident last decade finally pushed him to finish, after he was scared he won't get to it. This series is woven into many of his books, a hint here, a reference there. He spoke of how he feels it interwoven with his life.

You may not know that the inspiration to that series came from a poem, Robert Browning's "Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came".
It's only fitting then, that King's series in turn inspired me to write a couple of poems.
Well, more like 1.5 poems. I had an image crawl into my mind, and when I took to pen and paper it came as two similar but not perfectly aligned pictures. Look at them both to take in the full image.

Sunset.jpg

Sunset 1:

Amidst the field of roses,
a gaunt scarecrow
grows.
King of all that it surveys.

Its skeletal shape glows
the colour of bleached bones,
amidst the blood-red
weeds.

You can see it pointing
its inviting finger at you.
And the board is set —
A match for two.

Your cloak of shadows
twirls along your path.
The roses fly
and the light falters.

A sunset birthed of Delirium.

Separator line_smallEST.jpg

Sunset 2:

A scream of blood-raw roses,
a gaunt scarecrow grows
in its midst
like a skeleton key.

Like a finger it both
calls and commands;
a destiny it promises to unlock
and a curse to fulfill.

From above it looks to be
a tooth,
chipped and cracked.
A hateful white.

The crows take flight
— a sunset drawn in Hell.

Separator line_smallEST.jpg

I can't use this image because I don't own the rights, but this is the perfect image to go alongside with the poems above, not the one I ended up using. Check it out.

Check out my latest posts:

IOW COLOR LOGO.png
Art and flair courtesy of @PegasusPhysics

Image source.

© Guy Shalev 2007.

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Well I am not going to comment on the form and presentation of the pieces as iI feel they are perfect as is. What I did notice is that the first piece makes the reader a protagonist, and even though the scenery is daunting I still feel on has a chance to win against the scarecrow ...

The second is more impersonal basically the protagonist is observer but does not necessarily have to be involved in what's happening. The scarecrow is beconning whomever no one specific , and yet this one feels darker. One gets the feeling that whatever victim that scarrow is gonna get will not stand a chance against him.

Well, I'm not sure I'd say that in the second, the "protagonist" is an observer (and I'd pick "narrator"), in fact, I agree with you that the second is more impersonal, more detached, and I'd take it as far as to say that in the second, there is no narrator. There is no protagonist.

It's just a third person narrative.

In the first, there's definitely a call to action. Something is about to happen.
In the second, it's more of what this began as, painting an image.

So yes, I feel both add up to the right atmosphere, of a call to action, but with a heavier emphasis on the picture being drawn.

Though I'll ask, is it necessarily the Scarecrow that is the opposition in the second? Or is it the "key"? Or the field? Or the sunset? Or the entire vista your eyes see? Hmmm.

to me yes but only because it promised something and thus for me became the creator of the scene.

I read Stephen King, religiously, throughout my teens (including what he wrote using his pen name, Richard Bachman) so quite familiar with his dark delights.

This is similarly delicious stuff, Guy, your lengthening shadows--menace of scarecrow growing as sun sets--visuals worthy of Tim Burton, every word in place.

I'm not too fond or overly familiar with his horror (very active imagination, you should ask me some time to tell you of me and the terrors of the dark in my youth), but I can tell you that I've found the first 3 books in particular of The Dark Tower so much better than everything else of his I've read. Except maybe his autobiographical storytelling in On Writing that often had me howling in laughter. Makes you wonder why he didn't write more humor.

And thank you kindly, Yahia. I like painting pictures with poetry. I feel like painting a picture that evokes feelings is the one thing poetry does better than any other form of writing, so hearing it worked on your end? Very nice to hear.
And Tim Burton? That's someone whose work I've consumed most of, and is exactly the sort of accolade you'd like to go along with this sort of piece. Though this is darker, with no humorous undertone, heh.

The dark tower series is so much better than his other work. It does have nods to his other stories but it is so much more polished in tone and narrative. And the characters are ones to love and cherish, forget anything you know about him when you read it it is a class in it's own.

I have read many of Stephen King's books, and I've spoken of reading The Dark Tower. Now after reading your poetry, I am definitely going to pick it up. Your Mastery of poetry always leaves me wanting more and wishing that I had more skill! I can fully appreciate these images With your poems attached. The two are similar but very very different.

I truly enjoyed Browning's poem and the backstory to Dark Tower just now. Thank you for that, too!

I truly enjoyed Browning's poem and the backstory to Dark Tower just now. Thank you for that, too!

When I first read the first book in The Dark Tower, I actually looked up the poem and read it. It tickles me that these are poems, based on a series, based on a poem, based on a line in a play by Shakespeare, based on older tales. Where else will this road take us? :D

And thank you for the extremely kind words, Janelle. I feel humbled.

Do share later what you've thought of the series though, either here or on Discord :)

I am glad I met you and am able to read your amazing poetry and insights here on Steemit. I will share my impressions of Dark Tower when I get to read them.

I always reread your poems a couple of times in order to understand it. You really have a gift in writing poetry and I always look up to you. Stephen King's books are always a work of wonder. I might give The Dark Tower series a read. :)

Thank you for the kind words Ree!

And telling someone like me they might get you to read something based on a recommendation? Little can be kinder!
The books, especially the first three, are a treat.

Though now I wonder if my poetry is too complex, hm. Then again, this is my writing of old :3

You're welcome <3

I'm not all that familiar with Steven King's writings (I like the films, but as my tutors used to say; That Doesn't Count) however I enjoyed the surreal, foreboding creepiness of these verses. This section in particular put me in mind of The Seventh Seal:

You can see it pointing
its inviting finger at you.
And the board is set —
A match for two.

I think the two renditions work great as companion pieces and am glad you shared them together! Like a kind of multi-dimensional poetry, familiar with each other but at the same time uncomfortably alienated.

Yup! I sometimes see other people go for this stereoscopic poetry, but you'd think it'd be more common.
I guess it isn't because people just try to invoke all the images across one longer poem, but that ends up different.

Thank you for the comment, and yes, the movies hardly count :P

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