Dealing With People Who You Don't Agree With

I try to get along with everyone as best I can that I come across in my life and I have learned that in order to do that I need to be cautious about what sort of topics I bring up at what times. Meeting my in-laws for the first time and giving them my thoughts on politics for example, is probably not going to be a good idea.

I had a family bbq once where I made the mistake of getting into a heated political debate with my father-in-law and it just made things really awkward thereafter for not just us but everyone else who was there just looking to enjoy their time as well.

Blurting out heated opinions in the middle of a family gathering probably isn't going to convince anyone or sway them to change their mind either. I think it takes the right time and place in order to catch someone at a time when they are truly open to an honest debate and open to really searching for truth; willing to change their mind when confronted with new information.

I have gotten into enough political disagreements with friends and family in the past to know that most of the arguments are fruitless, and it's prompted me to want to re-think my approach in how I communicate when them overall. The family members and friends who I have had the most successful discourse with in the past, are the ones who I was able to engage with one-on-one, perhaps share book recommendations with, or speak to in-length in private.

Another important thing to remember that keeps things cool when dealing with others who you might not get along with is to remember not to take things too seriously or personally. I think it's important when we are around someone who we don't get along with to remember not to be too touchy or easily offended.

Sometimes when I am hearing certain political views that are promoting violence to be used in order to solve some sort of problem, it can understandably cause me to feel angry, but choosing to not be too easily offended by the retorts of others is going to allow us to get along better with them and keep things calm when we are spending time with one another.

Understanding where they are coming from can also help us to meet them in the middle and start a discussion from there which could turn out to be much more effective.

Employing empathy can also help us to get along better because it prompts us to search for understanding the individual rather than quickly rushing to judgment. When we exercise empathy then we exercise consideration for others and their points of view, because not everyone is going to think as we do.

There is a time and a place to have certain discussions, especially when at social or formal gatherings and meeting people for the first time. It has been said that the definition of a gentleman is someone who makes those always feel comfortable when they are around him and I think this plays into using discernment when we want to get into certain topics of discussion with others. Do we want to foster positive relationships around us that take into account a consideration for others? Learning how to spend time with people who we don't agree with is going to benefit us overall and allow us to be more successful in communicating with people who hold different views than we do.

Focusing on the good of an individual and their strengths can also help us to get along better. For example, I might not like my cousins political views, but maybe I really like the fact that she runs a successful business? Or that she is a great mother to her kids? Instead of focusing on what I don't like about the individual and using that to drive us apart, I can instead focus on the good and that can bring us closer together.

Might I also recommend a great read that is related to this matter:
Economics Helps You Deal with Difficult People by Dan Sanchez
http://bit.ly/2clCH43