Prevent “I Want it” meltdowns
Sometimes the child may be hanging off of the parent, pulling on their jacket, I have even seen kids hitting their parents trying to get their attention. This continues on for minutes, tens of minutes, possibly hours or what feels like the entire day.
Other shoppers without children walk by giving the “get a hold of your kids” look. Other mothers walk by giving the “I have been there” look. As a parent all you can give back is the “I am embarrassed look.
So how can you prevent such a meltdown? Well there is not real answer. I think it is bound to happen with all children at some point in time. My wife and I did plan ahead and have had great success with Luke when shopping. Many people often tell us that he is well behaved for being in a toy store.
As early as two years old we would take trips to the local Toys R Us. Luke loved walking down the aisles and touching almost everything. Before we left the house we always sat him down and said that we are going to the store but remember that we are not buying anything today, we are just looking at things. Often we would pull out the camera and take pictures. He would say “Take a picture, maybe someone could get me that for my birthday” or “take a picture, maybe if I am a good boy you can buy this for me”.
I know it takes extra time to go to the store for no reason, but it the long run it has been worth it. Everyone learns by repetition. It is just the way our brains works. If you can stay consistent and make going to the store and NOT getting something happen more often than going to the store and getting something, then you are going to eventually be on the winning side. This trick worked with our son Luke. I am willing to bet that it will work with your kids as well.
Do you have any tricks that will make parenting easier?
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Darryl (@dadview) resides in Canada. He is a loving husband and father who enjoys spending time with his family no matter the activity.
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Excellent advice. I never thought of it as a strategy, but my kids have always gone almost everywhere with me. We also made it a point to not say "we don't have enough money," but rather "we choose to spend our money on other things." This keeps them from developing poverty mentality. I also try to connect with them when they do have meltdowns. I never cave to what they're wanting, but I try to ignore other people and give them the connection they're really needing.
We also had our kids buy a lot of their own stuff. My older two are 19 and 15, and they bought a lot of their own toys, especially the electronics. They learned to save. They also learned to sell used games and systems on eBay. Learning money management is maybe one of the most important things we can teach. Thanks for your post. Helpful as always.
I was never taught money management. It is something I want my son to learn. We will buy things that he needs but will make him save for things that he wants. Even if we split it 50/50, we want him to learn how to save up and realize the value in things.
The toughest part is that he is an only child who has 4 aunts and 3 uncles. So he has a lot of chances to get gifts and be spoiled.
Darryl
Yeah. I had to give up on trying to limit the grandparents. I just had to let it go. It was periodically way out of control. Luckily as they got older, they would ask them to help with one big thing. At least at that point it wasn't 50 million little things.
Maybe as a result of this my kid would rather get 50 million little things... maybe because he know his money will stretch farther.
Thanks for the comments
Darryl @dadview
Sounds like great advice, thx for sharing. We've been lucky not to have much trouble but we also only hit the toy store a couple times a year.
Good advice. I have a special child and she knows from a very young age, she can see and try to play but cannot buy unless as a family it is suitable and of value to her development. She has never given us any stressful moments at the toy shops or shopping centre. Because we told her we cannot afford all toys but if we believed she can learn or bettered her fine motor or other skill sets, we will be prepared to spend. She belongs to the high function group and she can understand why and now at 27 she can make her own decision as well.
Praise The Lord for giving us a beautiful and well behaved child. For that we are thankful.
@jackpot
God bless you.
Glad you stopped in to read my post.
Dadview