The noise follows me around,
as I feel myself sink deeper into the ground.

Hollow images projected onto walls,
I scream out waiting for the haunted to fall.

Swaying against the bitter wind,
it claws it's way into furthest corners of my soul,
creating visions that disengage me,
from the norm.
I rise up now to meet and embrace
the oncoming storm!

The last few days I have been feeling quite tired and overwhelmed, for all my positivity I simply have to allow myself to feel the reality, of where I am at, in my life.

I find it so difficult to rest, firstly because I rarely get to do it as a single parent and secondly because I always see, way too much that needs to be done and usually last an hour until I get up and start doing something. Only to be overcome with tiredness and have to sit down again.

I am just not very patient and I am not very good at self care. I am great at talking about it and at advising others to do so, but we're all like that aren't we?. This year I really wanted to do things differently, simply because I have to, how can I be fully present for my girls if I am not looking after myself. And the best way for me to instil the importance of self care in them, is if they see me taking care of myself. When they see me prioritizing it!

Life is never always a bed of roses, sometimes things get really difficult and all we can do is just go through it. Knowing full well that it will pass.

Society has really pushed this idea of happiness and stability on us, that we should all be aiming to be happy all the time and if we are not, well damn there is something wrong with you! This happily ever after life, that is being shoved down our throats thanks to Hollywood and the likes.

Life is not about being stable, life is about balance. Balancing our emotions, allowing ourselves to feel sad when we need to and not feeling bad because we can not snap out of it. No one ever tells you to snap out of your happiness.

We need those days where we can feel sad and frustrated and at the same time feel supported and understood. For sure happiness is great and we should want one another to be happy, but please lay off the pressure of having to be happy all the time!

We are made up of many different shades and all of them make us who we are. My pain and sadness, my rage, they fuel my creativity and I would not be who I am without them.
I would not have the ability to express myself if I did not embrace them.

Sometimes I write because I am so pissed off and I need to let it out so that I can move forward. By expressing it, I learn to understand it more I understand myself more. Keeping things inside, rattling around in my head does me no good, it does none of us any good,

I long for the days where we feel as comfortable talking about our pains, as much as when we talk about our happiness. Where people encourage us to share with one another.

Life is never black or white and although there are only two sides to a coin, we are multi dimensional and have many sides, lets embrace them all!

8 Pillars of TribeSteemUp