Neighbours around

We all have them. They live next door or about 8 kilometers away from you, but a neighbour is a neighbour. Neighbours can be great and helpfull or a big burden.

It is amazing how many people are bullied by their neighbours.

They live in a hell because of them or have the feeling they do so. To me it was a good reason to move several times. If you move you can make a new, fresh start. But it is not always that easily done as said. You need to find a place with good neighbours and an other place as well. A rental house is hard to find, the area does count for me as well (I do not want my children to grow up in a neighbourhood where they are afraid to set a food outside) and you never know how your, kind at first neighbours, will develop in time. Besides of all of this, moving costs a lot of money and time.

Neighbours can be unfriendly for all kind of reasons.

Looking back mine were, in most cases, because I did not want or had the time to join their "club". The club of decorating the street for the Queen her birthday, daily coffee and gossipping at 9:30 am, the yearly street bbques, etc. etc. I also do not like to gossip daily at frontdoors, schools or invite them for a drink. I am that neighbour with a job, the one who is always busy, the one with a life of her own, the one with a lack of sleep, the single mom who needs to spend time with her children as well and needs to show up at school for bla bla and more nonsense (mostly in the evening if you have dinner).

Single moms are not wanted for a neighbour.

In my (former) neighbourhoods it was always the same. Men think you need something, something you will give for free, called sex. They think they are your saviour and your door is always open. Wrong. Mine is closed.
Women see you as a threat. They think you will steal their husbands. (Sorry ladies I am far of interested in your husband. I am still, after 28 years, happy I am divorced. The last thing I want is taking care of your bored husband.).
Since I am single and am not hunting for men, I am also not able to greet or have a chat. For some reason men see it as an invitation to show up on my doorstep or grab me between the legs (Spring again?!).

If you do not interfere with your neighbours, they do not like you,

they know nothing about you and have nothing to gossip about.
They will start bullying you to get that info. They will try to attract your attention in all kind of ways. CPS, animal rescue, cutting your plants and trees, damaging you car, parking their car in front of your house, letting their dogs out in your garden, posting in groups at your frontdoor, stealing your post or worse...

How to deal with annoying neighbours?

If you want a live, if you do not want these daily stress or fights you have not much options.
Beat them or join them.
To join them does not mean you have to gossip or invite them daily, but you can give them something to talk about. That "something" is the piece of information you are willing to share (people love to eavesdrop and do love to hear about your misery life, it makes them feel better about themselves). In a great chat with your child or friend or... outside on the street or in your garden, at the moment the neighbours are outside, you can tell about your bad luck etc. (you are free to make up what you like.). Now the neighbours have information about you (telling you will move in time helps as well) and will spread it around and let you live in peace.

This advice was given to me by a friend years ago. It did work! She said that if people know nothing about you, they will start pushing and going over your bounderies, till they get what they want. Without your personal news they think you feel better as them. In a community you simply need to claim your place and territory. Know your boundaries and do not be afraid to define and defend them. If you do not do so your neighbours will keep pushing you.

A friend is terrorized by his neighbours.

He tries to fight back, but there seems to be always something to fight about. Things not worth fighting about. They know he is ill, so perhaps this is a good reason to be a pain in the ass and make his life extra miserable.
The good news is these neighbours will move soon. Hopefully the new ones will simply let him be. There is no reason to have a good neighbours, force someone into it, if you can make friends worldwide.

Een Nederlandstalige groep kun je via discord volgen https://discord.gg/zASWDT

Like to know more about me? Please read my other posts.

It is a wonderful world

https://steemit.com/life/@wakeupkitty/it-is-a-wonderful-world

Write that story (book) if you can!

https://steemit.com/stories/@wakeupkitty/write-that-story-book-if-you-can

Waiting for King Filip's pardons

https://steemit.com/life/@wakeupkitty/waiting-for-king-filip-s-pardons

Not what I wanted

https://steemit.com/life/@wakeupkitty/my-new-car-is-born-2018-04-26-14-19-06

Gossip is breaking news

https://steemit.com/life/@wakeupkitty/gossip-is-breaking-news

Scary clowns

https://steemit.com/life/@wakeupkitty/scary-clowns