Message to my Former Self

I was brought to this world from nowhere exactly, I just happened to be an existence from a product of fertilization, no informed consent from any of them. all my parents did was pray for a child and it came, then the struggles began. A two-sided struggle, parents trying to train up a child and the child trying to live up to expectation. the struggles continue up till death, so the only time a man rest is at his death.

Struggle is not suffering but a process to learn overcoming adversities, so it's a thing to embrace not avoid. Each day we strive to become better, use our God giving abilities to bring innovations and inventions.For me, I was struggling because I hadn’t become a person worth knowing. All my life has been God's mercy over and over.

When I grew to the age when men struggle hard to make names for themselves, I cared less,not because I had the money to pay my bills but because I had this mindset of "things are supposed to work themselves.

Source

So ,what's the message to my former self? That I have become stronger ? Or that I have been transformed to grow each day of my life either from lessons learnt or told.? Not too far from it, As a child, I spoke like a child, as a man I spoke like a man. This is the evidence of growth and renewal, growing mature every day in our conduct, and wisdom. I grew up as an introvert, how I happened to be one, I really can't explain but I found myself in a wall of keeping to myself isolated. Though I got little merit from it but it bad side cost me more harm than good. I believed I wasn't better, lacked self confidence and esteem. Too bad that I had to go around looking for security from friends and people. Little did I know I could be whatever I wanted to be, only if I desired strongly to be one.

I lost Love, the people who were dear to me didn't have the chances of knowing because I wasn't confident enough to express it, oh, what a life of a loner , wishing and wishing for miracle each day of my life, hoping there will be a change all of a sudden but it never came,it was just like waiting endlessly for nothing as life was indirectly telling me ,wishes weren't enough, actions and my hard strive could make me who I want to be. But then, I think my ears heard a voice telling me, "get up" and make for yourself a future.

Oh former Me, they say change is constant and everything evolve even humans to become better and complex. I had to let you behind and break out to pursue a dream and a vision. I might have missed you but it's more a failure with you than the now, I have become a changed man, I have grown and each day I see my height going farther. We were meant to depart , and so I have. The things I use to do, I can't do, the lifestyle has equally changed. The change from the inside-out heading toward a target and gradually am approaching it, so now I introduced the new me, I Am A Victor