_{I never thought I'd say it this way, or here, like this, now, or ever.} Can't stop myself though.  I've come this far. Better just do it.  Get it over with.

How

^{How does one approach this?}

Where do I start?  How will it end?  What's next?

I was born, on a day—a day like no other.  Then I died, a few hours later.

I haven't lived since.

That's my life story.

^{I've always wanted to write that book.}

I'm glad I finally got a chance to get around to it.  It's finished.  Done.  What a relief.

Growing up wasn't easy.  It took me a few years to figure it all out.  Someone obviously didn't show up to work that day, or maybe I just got lost along the way.

Surrounded by people; I was alone.  Of course, as a baby, I cried.  I remember those tears.  Those first few years were tumultuous turmoil, traumatic, terrible.  Most people forget those early days.  I remember it all, and it feels so recent.

Nobody could see or hear me.  Before I learned how to walk, slithering around on that cold floor, I'd see them coming.  They'd step on me, then keep going.  I had to imagine what pain felt like because I couldn't feel anything.  It hurt.

I hated everything.

^{Hated everyone.}

The terrible twos, toddler times, up until about the age of five; nothing but a menace.

I wanted to get their attention.  I'd open cupboards then slam the doors.  I'd push things off tables and stands.  I'd hide things.  Important things.  At night I would run up and down the stairs; laughing.

At the age of six, my parents left me, in that house, all alone; I haven't seen them since.

My existence.

^{I wanted it all to end.}

But how do you kill yourself—when you're already dead.

I tried.

Knives didn't cut.  Fire didn't burn.  I'd run head first into the walls and go straight through without even leaving a dent.

Exiting the house was impossible.  I looked everywhere for a way out.  The front door seemed like the best place to start.

I'd go through.  I'd instantaneously end up right back where I started, facing the opposite direction.  I'd turn around, there's the door, try again; same thing.  Back door; same thing.  Windows; same thing.

Trapped.

^Silence.

The door finally opened.  It was my new family.  I was happy to see them.

It had been nearly an entire year since I had heard a voice that wasn't my own.

I'd watch them.  I knew all of their secrets.  These were bad people.  Liars.  Cheats.  I wanted them out of there.

My old tricks didn't work.

One morning while she was getting ready to leave, I stood inside the mirror.  She saw me, she screamed; I laughed.

They were gone.

Silence.

^{Who's next?}

The door finally opened.  It was my new family.  I was happy to see them.

Lazy.  Pigs.  Loud.  Obnoxious.  I wanted them out of there.

He'd sit in the tub, soak, drink beer, smoke cigarettes, and listen to his old cassette tapes while the little ones pounded on the door, yelling, screaming because he wasn't coming out clean on this day.

I saw the spirit leave his body after I pushed the old tape player into the water.  He saw me then, his eyes got big; I laughed.

Gone.

^Silence.

The door finally opened.  It was my new family.  I was happy to see them.

Everyone seems to bring something new to the table.  The world was changing, I was getting older.

This family was quiet, focused, busy doing nothing.  They brought new toys.  Computers.  The internet.  I'd sit, I'd watch, I'd learn.

A freak experiment eventually led me inside one of these devices.  That was the first time I ever left the house.  I could finally communicate with people, just as I'm doing now.  I could travel anywhere I wanted.  Freedom.

I've been everywhere; I've done everything.  There's nothing left.

Again.

^{I feel trapped.}

I want this to be over—and that's why I'm here.

They say these blocks on this blockchain cannot be tampered with; locked in. The instant this message gets sent out to the world, I'll travel along with it, and if everything goes according to plan, this should be the end of the line for me.  I will remain dormant inside this block, forever.  Nothing gets in, nothing comes out.  I'll finally be able to rest.

It's been one hell of a ride.  I wish you all the best.

Credits: _{All art and images seen here were produced digitally, by me. "I hope you all enjoyed that one.  Have a nice day."}

^{© 2018 @NoNamesLeftToUse.  All rights reserved.}