I did think about this when I went to bed. We are on the same page. I kind of figured out disappointment is more personal than anger. I think it is very seldom I would be disappointed in a stranger. Mad gets provoked by anyone.

I think I can be mad at someone and not be disappointed and vice-versa. So definitely two different emotions.

You can be disappointed for someone, disappointed in someone and someone can disappoint you but it is about expectations. Fair or unfair we all expect something of those we know.

Our son, who is a complicated dude, began basing his expectations on what he thought were mine. Once I figured this out we've had a lot of good discussions. Oddly, seems my 'approval' is what he was judging himself by. Complicated as I mentioned. Not sure why he felt I was the one he wanted and needed to please. Kind of a special honor but a lot of responsibility.

So we do need to have our own set of standards for ourselves more so than for others and try to remember other people have their own.

I do know someone in each of those social categories and those are the ones who unfortunately live up to the images we have much too often.

I have been disappointed in myself for being mad but don't know if I have ever been mad about disappontment.

My reactions to each varies I think. Disappointment I seem to manage more inwardly, sad, quiet, thoughtful. Mad is more outward where much more likely to express.

Both are judgemental and very human. We just can't let either get the best of us.

I never adjusted my expectations for Tyler. He still seeks my approval. I am hoping though that we have a better picture of what each of us feel.