The time I helped my friend lose his virginity....... and inadvertently turned him into a misogynist.

Not too long after high school I had a brief stint working in an ice cream shop.

I was an ice cream scooper.

It was an easy job and before long I found myself as the assistant manager.

Most of the people that worked there were really friendly. In particular I had a good friend whom I will call BJ.

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BJ was a shy kid and was terrible around women.

He had a great sense of humor though and was always quick with a story and a laugh.

We hung out all the time and did everything together.

He was a really good guy. He respected everyone and treated everyone well.

One day I was having dinner at my house when I received a phone call from an old friend of mine named Carolyn.

Carolyn was a big time party girl. She and I had briefly dated on and off more than a year ago.

She was an incredibly sexy Czechoslovakian girl. She was almost 6 feet tall with short blonde hair and crystal blue eyes.

"I hear that you're single these days." she asked me......her raspy voice still sending shivers down my spine.

"True enough. What did you have in mind?" the thought of going out on another date with Carolyn was definitely appealing.

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Carolyn had something else in mind though.

She told me there was a girl that she had been wanting to introduce me to for some time now. A sweet girl named Karina.

"Don't you have a date for me though?" I racked my brain.

Why not BJ? Sure he was a virgin........ and Carolyn might be too much for him to handle but...... what the heck....

"I have a friend that's a virgin. He has long brown hair and he's kind of a hippie. He's a really nice guy and I think you'd get along with him."

"A virgin!!" she was excited at the prospect.

I picked BJ up at about 6:00 from his parents house.

We then drove over to Carolyn's to pick the girls up.

Karina was pretty short but she had long black hair that fell below her buttocks. She had deep green eyes and a laugh that filled my heart with joy. She was incredibly beautiful.

BJ was immediately shy upon seeing Carolyn but she constantly put her arm around him and tried to make him laugh.

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We went out to eat and then found ourselves at the park before driving back to my house.

Karina and I sat in the backyard talking and drinking a couple of beers while BJ and Carolyn got cozy in my room together watching a movie.

Eventually it was time to take Karina home so I went into my room and told BJ I would be back to pick him up..

Carolyn and BJ were going to wait for me to get back. I went ahead and put on Carolyn's favorite album which was Smashing Pumpkins Siamese Dream and begin to let it play.

I took Karina home and we shared a brief kiss before she went into the house. I was excited about our future.

Arriving back at my house I walked over to my room and opened the door without knocking.

The room was completely dark and a set of animal eyes poured over me accompanied by a slight grunting.

I quickly shut the door and went outside to smoke a cigarette.

Well I guess BJ isn't a virgin anymore.

Within about 5 minutes BJ came and sat next to me on the back porch.

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Neither of us said anything for a couple minutes.

At that point BJ spoke softly.

"What a slut."

My jaw dropped.

"You just lost your virginity right?" I inquired.

"Yeah man. Pretty cool. I banged that whore...... you know."

"Carolyn's not a whore bro. She's my friend and she's a good person."

I had never seen BJ act like this and I was really disappointed in his behavior and frankly shocked by it.

After this BJ stopped being shy but also stopped being friendly and humorous. He stopped telling silly little stories and completely focused on banging girls that he thought were sluts.

He was pretty successful too but he was never nice about it.

We stopped being friends because I didn't want to be around somebody like that.

I wondered for a long time if this person was always lurking inside of him and maybe just needed a catalyst to come out or if I did something to damage my friend.

I haven't spoken to BJ in over 20 years but I remember the person he used to be and I also remember the person that he became.

Sometimes a tragedy is right around the corner.

Sometimes it can be avoided with a simple smile or a kind word.

On the other hand sometimes you can completely change someone by introducing something into their lives that should never have been there in the first place.

I miss BJ and I wonder sometimes if he still exists in some small part.

I also wonder if I was the one to make him completely disappear.