YOU ARE Perfectly, Imperfectly NORMAL

“have I gone mad? im afraid so, but let me tell you something, the best people usually are.” ― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Recently, I wanted to write a post about love, but I didn't - I wrote about something else. Later that day I read another post about love written by somebody else here on Steemit. I read it and loved it. It made me a little sad in a way that I had ignored what I was pulled to do in the first place, but the author of said piece said "you must still write yours" - to which I smiled.

This is my post - about LOVE

and the ABSOLUTELY DIRE NEED for more of it, in every facet of EVERY PERSONS LIFE!

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For as long as I can remember, people have always looked at me like I was a square peg in a round hole - I have NEVER been considered “normal”. I was too loud, I spoke my mind, I wasn’t interested in the things that others were, I broke all the rules, I dressed weirdly (to “them” anyway) - I have just NEVER conformed, never listened, never stepped inside that box

– I refused (and I still do)! I have ALWAYS done things my way and this has put me in the face of resistance and scrutiny again and again and again.

So, what is “normal”? Is it what Google tells us it is? Is what other people say we should be? Is it what we tell ourselves that we are not?

Who cares!

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Granted, growing up I was a little bit of a “wild child” (ok that is probably the understatement of the year) but I was just never accepted by the “run of the mill” types – hence my eventual solace in those found in night clubs and dark corners. It was throughout these years that I realised just how detrimental the effects of negative social conditioning and lack of emotional support are on people (including myself).

So, before I go ANY further with this post, I want to say something – and please LISTEN TO ME!

THERE IS NOTHING FNCKING WRONG WITH ANY OF US – WE ARE ALL PERFECTLY IMPERFECT!!!!

Ok, well it was good to get that off my chest ;) – Moving along lol…

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I listen to A LOT of music - and I listen to it PROPERLY… I absorb it and take it in completely! (Which I wrote about in “The Seduction of the Senses” - https://steemit.com/life/@jaynie/the-seduction-of-the-senses)

A little while ago I stumbled across a music video which hit me from the second it started. Yes, it is a “pop” song but give it the time of day if you will… – and on that note, people are far too quick to write off pop music as being “shallow” or meaningless, simply because of the genre it falls in to (yet another inaccurate judgement)

But this song smacked me on to my back. It spoke to every single part of my being! - There is just SO much pressure these days to "conform" - to be "this" or "that" - to achieve beyond our years, to climb insurmountable mountains and it just makes me sick to my stomach! When did we all forget to just live... and LOVE one another?!!!!! There is SUCH a strong message in this music video - I can only hope that I am not alone in seeing it!

It is SCARILY accurate in depicting the ridiculous amounts of stress, anxiety, self-loathing and depression that so many people live with in today's society.

It is nothing short of tragic that children and adults are living in a society that has replaced a simple basic need (LOVE) with medications and “things”. Where love and emotional support are needed, verbal judgements and diagnosis accompanied by little tablets of all shapes and sizes are handed out instead – that will solve the problem, right?!

LOVE– who needs that stuff anyway?!

Is it any wonder that a good portion of people in the world are walking around thinking and feeling like something is wrong with them… Is it any wonder that people lose their Sh*t and go loco?

No, no… it isn’t surprising at all!

Love is a staple ingredient of life. In fact it IS LIFE! Life without love is a guaranteed train wreck!

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Yet, somehow (amazingly enough) - this is STILL not realised by so many, and they continue to make two VERY large mistakes. They replace love with “stuff” and then they continue to “judge” the people that they denied the love… and gave the stuff.

I wrote about people judging others yesterday which you can read here if it catches your fancy: https://steemit.com/life/@jaynie/judgement-and-the-mask

Why are people so damn BLIND!

We are ALL beautiful, intricate, intrinsic parts of a whole! Every single one of us has a purpose here and a role to play. The fact that you don’t understand or agree with another’s purpose and/or path, does not make it *(or them) “unacceptable” – nor does it make them “not normal”.

If there is any REAL “problem” in that sentence, to my mind it would be that there is often no effort made to do exactly that –trying to understand or accept it – who knows… you might actually learn something if you did…

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So – we are starved of love, emotional support and any real kind of embrace. We are shoved aside and handed objects to replace the fundamentals, we are repeatedly fed negativity about what and who we are, we are diagnosed with all sorts of ailments and conditions and then after all that, we must still stick a plastic smile on our faces and be what society has deemed normal?

Yes, ok… sure! – No problem…

Bugger it all! – That’s what I say!

I will say it again!

THERE IS NOTHING FNCKING WRONG WITH ANY OF US – WE ARE ALL PERFECTLY IMPERFECT!!!!

“We're all mad here.” ― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Yesterday my son asked to watch the movie “Captain Underpants” and I couldn’t help but giggle because it surfaced a memory of when he was about 4 and attending play school. He had taken to wearing his underpants on his head at the time as this transformed him into a super hero. Hehe (how cute is that!! Lol)

On one particular morning he decided that he wanted to wear the “underpants hat” to school… well, I felt it only fair to explain to him that the other children might think it a little funny but that if he wanted to do so… he absolutely could. He did!
So I guess my son isn’t normal then?

No, he isn’t – but he is BEAUTIFUL! He is PROUDLY unique and I NEVER want him to change!

Jude now attends a fairly exclusive and rather expensive (yeah, I am mostly broke because of it) private school, which is known for being very inclusive when it comes to special needs kids. No, Jude is not a special needs child, nor does he have any learning difficulties, or any other social conditions and no he has not been shoved on to any medications for said non-existent conditions lol.

I am merely mentioning this because at his school, they are taught to accept EVERYONE! I think it is SUCH an amazing ethos to be raised with. On the very first school meeting for the new Grade 1 parents last year, we were shown this video called “Animal School” – I sincerely encourage EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU to watch it and then to watch it again! Show it to your friends and to your children!

Let it be understood, that just because we are all different, does not make any one of us wrong or abnormal!

Another song comes to mind now (and yes, it’s another pop one lol)… it is simply because of the lack of understanding, compassion, love and acceptance that we all have so many damn “issues” and are considered “not normal”.

How sad is that!

Well, I think it is anyway! And I think we need to start making an effort to change it! We need to start seeing the beauty in those around us instead of the opposite. We need to start understanding that home life is not quite what it used to be, families are not always what they used to be, childhood is not what it used to be and so the list goes on…

When we encounter people in our day to day activities, we just don’t know how much our kindness, acceptance or gestures of affection might impact that individual positively.

So just do it!

Look beyond the definition of “normal”, see the soul and then feed it with what it will ALWAYS need most – LOVE!

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As for me... well, despite the "horrendous" looks I get these days when I STEP OUT with my over the knee Winter boots... I am perfectly OK with that - got to give "them" something interesting to talk about at their dinner table, if they even eat dinner at a table ;)

Until next time…

Much love from Cape Town, South Africa

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