The nice vs. naughty list: Where do you stand?

in #life5 years ago

There are many different names, origins, and traditions of what we now call Santa Claus here in the United States. As a parent, the concept that Santa brings presents to good little boys and girls by checking his list twice to see who is naughty and nice is a nice tool to help with encouraging and rewarding good behavior.

But what do you do when you think your child should be on the naughty list??

Here in our country any of us who are awakened understand that the winter holiday season is a cleverly disguised trap to focus on spending insane amounts of money and supporting consumerism. Individually, of course we all have traditions and sentiment concerning the holidays, but that sentiment is the very thing that they use to trap us!

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Here's a great example of something I found in a large store a couple of weeks ago ~ llamas are now a part of holiday sweaters??

This year I am not really feeling the holidays. If I didn't have children at home, I would just enjoy a quiet December without any holiday. However, I have 4 of 6 children still in the house so unless I just really wanted to be a jerk that's not possible.

But that's not the real dilemma.

Child #5 (who is 8) has made a lot of choices this year that revolve around being dishonest. In our home, honesty is required, and yet this child is currently choosing otherwise. I understand that I am a bit spoiled, to make it to child #5 before having one that absolutely will not choose to be honest. I also recognize that only time can fix this issue, because in every human the choice to be honest is a personal one. While we can encourage honesty through a multitude of parental tools, we can't make that choice for them.

Twice this very week alone we have had issues with lying and stealing from family members in the house. She is very material oriented, and absolutely loves presents. In both instances this week I presented her with the idea of if she was Santa, which list would her name be on?

And the waterworks began...

So let's get back to the dilemma. As a human I really feel like the naughty list should be honored. As a mom, I really feel like honoring Santa's rules of nice vs. naughty is the right choice, but then comes the guilt!

Do I want to be that asshole?
Would it really make a difference?
Is that really the best choice?

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If only we could live in the quiet house of our holiday scene, where it's always picture perfect!

Most of the time my posts are to share with fellow Steemians a bit of light, a bit of knowledge, a bit of creativity.

This time is a little different.

I am looking for some feedback from the world of parents and children out there.

Have any of you Santas ever gifted the stockings full of coal?

Have any of you ever been on Santa's naughty list where it happened to you?

How does the nice vs. naughty list work in your family?

I look forward to some of you participating in the conversation with me in the comments for this post.

I will be gifting participants with small tokens of gratitude.

Thanks for reading!

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A person makes mistakes, over time it becomes an experience.
The man is not perfect, and besides, he can’t have the answers to all the questions of life.

Understanding that, as a parent, we can not make choices for our children in some areas. The universe allots us with the role of keeping them safe, and to guide them to making good decisions. However, as you accurately deciphered and shared in this post, they have to make the decision themselves. Innate to us, and given at birth, are the rights to choose our own internal principles. As a parent, we lead by example. Bridging the gap of understanding is somehow tough, and sometimes the universe gives us a break and gives that little extra nudge that is needed. I hope that your child can find honesty, as it is so important to development, and I'm sure, with your example he/she will. Happy holidays to you and your family. :)

This post is so lovely. I can feel your mother's heart. There is deep wisdom in your words, "I also recognize that only time can fix this issue, because in every human the choice to be honest is a personal one. While we can encourage honesty through a multitude of parental tools, we can't make that choice for them." In light of your words, I wonder if you have found the heart of the dilemma. You ask whether you should honor Santa's rules for your child being naughty. But maybe these are two separate issues. Your family values honesty. Being dishonest is a violation of your family rules. But, does Santa value honesty? Does Santa believe that dishonest people are on the naughty list? Instead, could Santa still gift as per usual, but maybe this year also give the gift of a family activity where you discuss why honesty is important? Or a book about honesty in Child 5's stocking? I love Teaching Tolerance Magazine and they post many resources online as well. What's Fair? could be printed out and put in a stocking for the family to talk about together. And Positive Psychology offers these resources that could be a fun Christmas Day bonding activity around a fire with a cup of coco. Maybe if Santa shows support for your family values by gifting a way to talk about them, Child 5 may find more value there too. Sending good momma vibes 🌱

Thank you for the very kind gift @freemotherearth. I hope your family had a very merry Christmas 🌱


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I knew that you were close to becoming a Minnow @freemotherearth! Congratulations!

Call Krampus and ask for an express delivery of one large box of sticks and a stocking-stuffer of coal! It might be a good opportunity to stand that 'materialism' on it's head. Perhaps the child in question should read some of the stories about Krampus and his duty to punish ill-behaving children.

That is my two cents and I am sticking to it because yeah I got sticks and coal one year for being naughty!

Thanks @jacobpeacock! I might have to dig up some Krampus stories, that's a great idea!

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