You can't take care of anybody else unless you can take care of yourself first. I used to run around helping everybody that asked for it until I realized most people don't actually need help. I was just neglecting myself. They are simply lazy, selfish and feel entitled to be treated better than others despite treating others worse than they expect to be treated. That was when I stopped trusting people who hadn't earned it. Stopped being a sucker for the damsel in distress. Stopped caring if people cried when they didn't get treated like a special snowflake just because. I was tired of being used and I still am.

But part of me pushed through. I realized I could still be the nice guy, but also be someone people respected for being upright and forthright. Not just a doormat for other people's expectations, but someone who has expectations based on mutual respect, human dignity and honesty. If someone can't manage that, they are jettisoned, be it with a smile and handshake or a finger to the face.

It is amazing how powerful the words "I'm sorry, but I can't respect that kind of selfishness," are. Some come around and things can be salvaged, but most will slink off and curse you, either way, problem solved. Few things feel better than telling someone who has mistreated you or abused your trust that you have seen through their game and won't play anymore.

Life is give and life is take, it is the balance of the two that makes it bearable. Be it business or personal relationships, that is a truism that doesn't fade. Taking and taking would make me the scum I can't respect, giving and giving would mean I couldn't look myself in the mirror and respect myself for not standing up for myself.

It would be easy to stay bitter given how unjust many things have turned out, but I said f' that, I am not going to let my nice self, that I love, be obliterated by some selfish psychopaths. I just got smart about being nice I guess. It isn't always easy and I'm not always successful, but for me at least, neglecting my nice side would be utter defeat. I don't know if you can relate to any of this, but I could relate to your writing and thought I would share. Cheers!