Feel the Fear, and Then Do It Anyway

(Myself, and a couple of really cool guests, whose names have unfortunately escaped me)

I worked as a zip line tour guide for 5 years at the largest zip line canopy course in the world. Our course had over 70 zip lines, some that were 15 stories high, and some that reached speeds of 75 miles an hour. Rope bridges, that barely met the definition of a bridge, some 6 inches wide and all swaying freely, stretched through the tree canopies. I worked around fear. I’ve seen many grown men cry, I’ve seen mothers and fathers abandon their young children in the treetops to reach solid ground, and I’ve seen people completely frozen in fear, unable to move, speak, or think.

But the scariest thing we had was called The Power Free Fall. The Power Free Fall is a machine hooked to the side of a tower 100 feet in the air. Mechanically, it’s a glorified air-brake, designed by the Germans to get people out of burning buildings in less than 60 seconds. You’re put into a full body harness, hooked by your back, and asked to step off a platform into 100 feet of nothingness. As you fall, the machine slows your descent, and it works every time. It’s actually really hard for it not to work. There’s very little that can break, and it almost totally relies on physics; physics doesn’t stop working.

(Patrick Avery, professional human, my friend, and mentor, sitting on The Power Free Fall)

But don’t let me fool you, it’s incredibly scary. Even though guests are fully aware there are no refunds, only about 60% of people actually jump.

This is where we saw true human nature; this is where you could witness your brain shutting down your logical reasoning abilities, and putting you into fight or flight.

It seems the most brain power is diverted to the inner-critic; this is that voice in your head, that inner monologue of sorts, that tends to narrate your life. We know it best when it tells us we’re not good enough for something. It’s always there and everyone has one. It actually has a purpose: it’s supposed to keep you safe- safe from embarrassment, safe from guilt, safe from social exile, safe from harm in general. But evolution is a crude process, and we should not expect this clumsy defense mechanism to protect us under all circumstances. Surely, evolution never expected that we could ever safely leap from a 10 story building unscathed. In fact, evolution never expects anything; it’s simply a process of improvement based on one thing alone: the mistake. And surely, it’s a mistake to jump from a 10 story building. That’s at least what your inner-critic tells you.

Until you don’t jump from a 10 story building, and then your inner critic beats you all the way down the stairs. You’ll look down at all of your friends who all landed safely on the ground, not a frown in sight, and you’ll hear in the back of your head, “You must be a coward. Look at all of them down there so happy. You should feel ashamed for not jumping. Look at what you’re missing out on.”

It’s a clumsy defense mechanism; it just persuaded you not to jump, not to take the risk, not to have fun, and now, 30 seconds later, it has already doubled-backed on its own arguments. Would you ever listen to someone so confused in any other circumstance? Of course not, but you listen to the dissonance of your inner-critic every day.

So my job was to convince people not to listen to their inner-critic. It’s hard to convince people that the voice inside their head is not really their own, that it’s simply the body responding to stimuli. In fact, the vast majority of your day is your body simply responding to its surroundings. Psychologist Jonathan Haidt calls it the man riding the elephant, where the elephant is your automatic, instinctive responses and the man is your logical abilities; the elephant generally calls the shots. Anyone who’s become capable at meditation can witness this first hand. You can witness the waves of emotion arise in direct response to your circumstances. These feelings are not called upon by you, they appear mostly outside of your control.

So let me walk you through how I face The Power Free Fall…

First I decide I want to do the Power Free Fall. After all, it is an incredible experience. In fact, every time I do it, I land laughing my ass off. Not to mention I’ve probably done it over 200 times.

So I walk the 145 stair to the platform, and this is what I see.

(Taken by former tour guide, part time photographer, and best friend, John Krause)

Immediately, my heart rate increases, there’s butterflies in my stomach, I start to shake, and I start to lose the ability to make good decisions. I’m scared. Every fiber of my being is telling me, NO. You don’t have to do this, my inner-critic is telling me. You can do this another day. Step back.

Every tour guide is of the same consensus: “The Power Free Fall still gets to me.” It gets to everyone. This is the natural human response. Humans would not have made it very far if they were completely comfortable jumping from hundreds of feet in the air.

But that’s not what I’m thinking when I’m up there, at least not at first. I’m not thinking anything; that part of my brain has been shut down. I am not in very much control. My body is telling me, in every way that it can, that I should not do this. This is where you really understand how much control you actually have over yourself… not that much.

But then I remember to breathe.

There’s something very special about breathing. On one hand I can control it, and on the other hand, I cannot control it. And there’s something about slowing down your breathing that allows you to gain a little more power over yourself. It’s like gripping the reigns of the elephant. It’s at that point when I can simply witness what’s happening to me. I can feel the fight or flight response kicking in. I can feel the redirection of blood from the gut to the arms and legs and it causes a weirdness in my stomach. I can feel my arms and legs shaking. I can feel my heart beating faster to make up for the adrenaline dump. And I realize that I’m not doing any of that. It’s just my brain responding to what’s happening; it’s just brain signals. And what do I care about signals?

I feel the fear, and I do it anyway.

As soon as I step off my insides rise to my throat, putting pressure on my lungs in a way that expels all air. Every muscle in my body contracts. The machine is doing its job now, and I now feel resistance in the opposite direction. I can breathe again, but I’m still 20 feet in the air. There’s still another second or two until I reach the ground. I land with the same force as if I were to jump off of a chair. I’m laughing now. I always start laughing.

This process can be used to fight all fear. Always remember to breathe, and always understand that this is simply your body responding to circumstances. You can disconnect yourself from those feelings. Those feelings are not you, you don’t control them; they’re not your fault, they’re not important, and they’re not permanent. That voice in your head is not your own, it’s an evolutionary defense system, it’s not grounded by reason. Watch these things happening, realize they’re not in your control, and find what is in your control. First, your breath, and then, your choices.

The goal is to get to a point where you’re chasing the butterflies in your stomach, just so you can properly deal with them. But don’t think you can ever stop being afraid. No one is brave because they’re not afraid; being afraid is the only time you can be brave.

Here’s a video of someone facing The Power Free Fall like a champ, with my good buddy Nick Wortman hooking him up.