Let's Get Extremely Fucking Real With Dating: What Are You Truly Offering That Makes You So Attractive And Awesome?

in #life7 years ago

Yo, let's just be real with dating. These are two very common qualms, or perhaps queries if you will when it comes to dating:

- Girls look for a dude who's rich, has a nice car, looks tall, dark and handsome and ultimately can provide for them.

- Guys look for a hot, slim girl who's smart, can pay for half the bill and as a bonus, would be great if she's open enough to have sex on the first date.

But when you hear shit like this, the common diatribe follows:

- Like Eew! These girls are such self-entitled bitches! They're just gold diggers who are after money! Like, they seriously expect a guy to do everything for them!

- Like ugh! These guys are such douchebags! Always thinking with their dicks! Can't they be gentlemen and just treat a girl with respect?

Right?

It happens because society and the people around us has enforced ideals on us when it comes to dating, relationships and love.

It's like, money, nice cars, good looks and sex are all bad.

And I gotta say, that's a hock of bullshit.

These ideals make all of us come across as self-entitled brats who expect the other party to be attractive and awesome while we do fuck-all.

Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you: What are you truly offering that makes you a worthy candidate for a meetup, a romantic option, a partner and ultimately someone who can partake in the sacredness of holy matrimony?

Guys, if you call a girl a gold digger:

  • Do you seriously expect her to want to be with someone who's well, poor as shit and can't provide?
  • Do you think taking public transport on a hot, crowded day is the best option? 
  • Even if you aren't tall, dark and handsome, why would anyone be attracted to you physically if you choose to not eat well and exercise at all?
  • Do you think other guys, your competition are going to hold back on the material, good stuff just for you?
  • Don't you wanna feel empowered and spoil your girl?!

Girls, if you think all guys are douchebags who only think with their dicks:

  • If you don't want to put out so early, that's fine, but you gotta know that there're plenty girls out there who are willing.
  • What are you doing to stand ahead of these girls who you think are the gold diggers then? Because trust me, the attention is on them.
  • If you aren't offering sex early, are you paying for half the bill?
  •  Are you showing up on time? 
  • Can you take an Uber home yourself? 
  • Are you the one taking initiative to send a text? 
  • Or are you expecting him to do everything?
  • Because shit man, if you are, it's a lot of work and nobody likes romance to be a damn chore.

This is how extremely fucking real it is with dating.

Everyone wants something in return despite their own ideals. I call bullshit on anyone who claims it's all about ideals, principles, values and shit. Subconsciously, you want to feel at ease too right?!

Dating is supposed to be fun. If you aren't having fun, why the fuck are you dating him or her?!

And yeah, you have competition! 

So again, what are you truly offering?

Of course, it's essential to have ideals to vie for as you stick to your principles, morals and stuff.

But that's for the long-term.

Think about it this way instead:

What am I offering to attract them so they can come to me?

Then, what am I offering so they will stay with me?

Because ultimately, you gotta be working on yourself to offer the good shit.

Otherwise, you're just sitting there on your ass, vomiting your ideals from your mouth and expecting things to happen. And no, nothing will happen to you if you act like a self-entitled brat.


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If its a 1st time date, I agree with you that it has to be fun. Fun but not to the point of having sex. Call me a traditional person, I am proud of it. 1st time dating should be a matter of knowing both parties, a matter of personality finding. Certainly, what could a person get from somebody who wanted to have sex on the 1st meet?

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Lol... Yeah...the mentality of ladies and. Guys out there is not good... Guys who always complain about girls moving around with a rich guys... Yeah why can you strife and be the rich guy....
Fact: no one loves a broke nigga...i swear it.

And girls who always complain about the rich guys....cant you think that you can also be rich and serve as help to the guy...
Fact: trust me... No one loves a liability..strife to be an asset to your guy.. And not otherwise

You've raised some good questions. But your repeated use of the word "offer" makes me think we are constantly in negotiation for a business deal. For me, dating is about just exploring the loveliness of someone I'm attracted to. End of story. I leave the whole thing open ended, safe in the knowledge that I can and do provide for myself and my child, and that I am complete whether I currently live alone or share space with my lover. It's all good. The self-reflection is great. But let's just ENJOY the sparks of romance.

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