ふく福 : Taking a chance on luck - Lone foreigner walks into locals’ bar...
As some of you probably know, if you read/follow this blog lately, I’ve been feeling kinda blue as of late.
Tonight I went out for a walk.
I wanted to go out and be around people, but I didn’t wanna have to be phony or make small talk.
I decided to just go to the drug store and buy a bottle of Scotch, perhaps, but that felt boring and not right.
I ended up—after a couple walks back and forth—going into this izakaya, where I was blessed with the beautiful presence of others, who seemed to be also open to some human presence.
Please watch this short video and I’ll tell ya the story.
~KafkA
Graham Smith is a Voluntaryist activist, creator, and peaceful parent residing in Niigata City, Japan. Graham runs the "Voluntary Japan" online initiative with a presence here on Steem, as well as Facebook and Twitter. (Hit me up so I can stop talking about myself in the third person!)
Isn't it great how sometimes boredom can lead to something positive? I love that! It's funny how you call your being down 'flatlined'. I've been having the same kind of feeling on and off for the last few weeks and couldn't find the right word for it, since (like you also mention) it's not really depression. Only a couple of weeks ago, I had the same kind of feeling of being bored. Didn't feel like 'teaching' the kids and decided to bring them to the playground for a bit. We just moved and I thought we'd check out the area. We were there for an hour, and just as we were about to leave, another woman came in with her child. We ended up talking for a little over an hour and got along really well, as did her daughter with my kids. Before we left, my daughter said: "I think you have to exchange phone numbers." And so we did :) We're meeting again soon...Thanks for sharing your story.
This is great. Thanks for sharing this story. It’s a big encouragement to me as well. It always amazes me what’s possible when we let ourselves be a little vulnerable/open/happy.
You're very welcome. And very true. The funny thing is, is that she is now considering homeschooling because she's met my kids and she told me her older son isn't happy in school. So besides having a great time and meeting new people, she opened up her mind a little too!
That’s excellent!
I don't think most people would be happy at school. Before I dropped out of school I used to spend my classes reading novels and playing video games despite being top students in the class as I was becoming fed up with everything. It's not like I studied hard. It was mostly because the school was dragging me down. I was self-learning 2nd grade math for fun while in nursery and while doing my A/Ls I was getting lower scores than my peers who's answers were a page long compared to my quarter page which I managed to extend out of 3-4 lines of math.
I was at a point where I spent half of my school hours watching porn because I thought it was time better spent opposed to making myself write dumber answers to fit some arbitrary scoring system that rewards mediocrity above all else.
So I carry a very powerful contempt towards schools in general. I could never truly have any respect towards a school or a college.
Ha! It's like hearing my twin speak. I had exactly the same experience in school and college. I had good grades, would bring my books to the pool while others were at home studying. I can only remember 2 great teachers/classes, one for English and one for Art, the rest were just doing as they were told. I used to be bored all the time and got into trouble all the time for all sorts of things. It is a system that drags kids down, it always has been and will be if nothing changes. I used to read books way beyond my age, because the books we were 'allowed' to read: I'd either already read them or they were as boring as the classes were. And college? Well, went to two. Did I learn anything I wouldn't have known without it? No. I started working in 'my field of expertise' and became disillusioned very quickly about the way things worked. I quit it altogether for years, only to come back to it recently.
Sounds like a great evening. I recall many a time when I'd wander into a neighborhood izakaya and be made to feel right at home by the owner / chef or by a few locals sitting at a table. Almost instantly.
I always felt that that was quite remarkable, since Japan is in many way a somewhat "alien" culture to our western sensibilities. But in an izakaya or a mini karaoke / "snack" bar, any obstacles to intercultural communication would disappear for the duration of our stay in those places.
Of course, the booze helps, but that's not the only thing. In an izakaya, an outsider can be made to feel welcome / at home, much more so than would happen in most bars / pubs in the west.
Man, you really said it all here. There’s something about an izakaya that’s just different, isn’t there?
This was probably only my second or third time doing this, but this time it was with full intention and at a completely new place in a completely different neighborhood (my new neighborhood).
Mad props for doing this many times. I feel like I surpassed some sort of mental blockade last night.
Thanks for the great comment.
Cheers!
Best way to fight the bluess or depression is to keep active and try not to give in to that feeling, going out and be in contact with people is the BEST medicine! So good to hear you pulled it of and feel better because of it, you may return there, you may not.. but you made your mood a little better that time round, good job ;)
I might be one of the anomalies cause the exact opposite works for me. I prefer isolated meditation and picking apart my psyche. My experience is that instead of curing you, it makes you immune. Once I feel something bad and negative and after I get into my meditation/self-deconstruction phase, I tend to never have that feeling again. Anything that gets me down ends up never being felt by me ever again.
The process may be dangerous but it works for me.
If it works for you, I am happy for that.I think you are very brave in facing your problems head on.I think there is some truth in becoming immune for certain struggles if you choose to distract yourself from the problem all the time though, instead of facing it, or dealing with it from the root upwards.I try a healthy balance between both, but mostly going out, meeting new people, some random chitchat in de supermarket f.e. is an instant fix for my mood (when down), I used to pick away it my pshyche a lot! It sure helps in understanding and learning, but yeah, that selfdestruction part is something I'd rather never experience again (personaly)
It can be a dangerous path to take. I've been thinking about Death&Rebirth even at the age of 3-4. Those things ends up having an effect on you. When I face a problem I need to see an end to it. So I rip myself apart and see what's wrong.
You could read some of my philosophy articles:
https://steemit.com/philosophy/@vimukthi/psycho-engineering-how-i-deal-with-my-past-my-philosophy-about-past-and-the-reasoning-behind-it
https://steemit.com/@vimukthi/the-myth-of-the-nihilist-nietzsche-analysis-of-his-philosophy-throughthe-eys-of-zen
https://steemit.com/buddhism/@vimukthi/25-insightful-zen-quotes-to-meditate-upon-secret-extras-at-the-bottom-of-the-post
I will check them out when I get home from work later, thanks ;)
You are having fun, walking and restaurants, music, a little fresh air - beautiful.
good
Hi friend, I don't know why me too,some pessimistic thought arises frequently. I don't know why I am feeling bore to live, but any how have to live for my kids. You are our inspiration please don't upset for anything. You are so powerful and genius friend, your presence pleasant us greatly. Please stay strong safe and sound health. Wish you a very beautiful night my dear friend.
Thank you, @maya7. You are powerful as well, though you may not believe it.
Yes, I think there are certain types of individuals that have a tendency or capability to become more depressed than others. It’s usually people who think. ;) This also means we can feel a greater amount and richer, deeper happiness as well, though, I hope.
Wishing you happiness and power as well when the pessimism arises. Thanks for your encouraging words. I really appreciate it.
Hi friend thank you so much for your sweet words. I want some moral support from friends like you. Thanks, wish you a very beautiful day my dear friend.
Excellent video my friend and it's nice to see you are visiting some new places and meeting new peoples as well and that's great because it is a good way to release some depression and also one feel more fresh after meeting new peoples, i hope you are feeling much better now, Stay awesome my friend.
Thanks my friend. You as well.
ImKeep ya head up high bro. Not every time it's as smooth as we would like it to be.
Hope to catch ya on Saturday
Thanks man. And..Yeah!
Great thoughts you've shared here @kafkanarchy84 Life does have a tendency to become far too planned and regimented and I find these moments of spontaneity are really good for the soul. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you, @perceptualflaws. Well agreed.
Very cool. I very much enjoy being in the presence of others as well without having to stress about small talk. Small talk exhausts me and I want to not feel alone, but not exhausted or fake either.
Exactly. Thanks, @gniksivart.
Haha np we may not see eye to eye on everything, but I appreciate hearing all your views. Helps knowing people with common beliefs.