Hi Steemians! This is me: Finally Free

Hello Steemit community!

My name is Damaris Rivera

At 33 I finally feel like I have a solid grip on who I am and what I want from this life. From growing up in a strict, religious household to now being married to another woman who I adore @betterbeing, for most of my life I have wrestled with who I am and who I was told I needed to be. In recent years, I have finally felt free to be myself and in spite of much heartbreak and great loss I remain steadfast in my love for life and living. Although I have been through many dark, desperate and lonely times, I remain a positive person and believe in the power of love more than ever.

Some of my passions are being active, exploring, traveling, adventuring and anything that involves a pool or a beach. I adore puppies and babies and am known by many as the baby whisperer. My relentless, never give up attitude keeps me motivated in times of struggle and my highly competitive nature means I never back down from a challenge. With renewed purpose and confidence I am pursuing some big dreams and goals and trusting my even bigger heart to lead me there.

Coming from a large family of 5 kids who were homeschooled all the way through high school, family is very important to me. Having very little influence from the outside world we were able to develop our own mini culture amongst ourselves and this has shaped a lot of who I am and how I view the world. In recent years I have moved away from my religious upbringing and no longer identify with any religion. Most of my family, however, remain unmovable in their beliefs. Because of their strict views, the majority of my immediate family, aside from my brother @theferalone, strongly disagree with the life I have chosen to live. This has been a painful reality as my family’s approval and acceptance has always meant a lot to me.

Through the many crashes and spikes of life, my highly logical, detail oriented, and analytical mind has helped me stay grounded and allowed me to remain consistent during the lowest of times. I am a fast learner and generally think of myself as a sharp person (which took me forever to even admit). These qualities coupled with my distaste for failure and my relentless grit, have allowed me to succeed at most things I put my mind to.

But no one is without their flaws, scars, and crosses to bear. I struggle with anxiety and insecurities. Although my struggle with anxiety is minimal compared to others, I know what it’s like to always have to battle negative thoughts and to get fixated on them to the point of panic. Although there are times when I feel I can’t keep my emotions from spiraling out of control, my investigatory nature demands that I understand this struggle so I continually introspect to discover what my negative emotional triggers are and develop tools to control and redirect them in a healthy way. There is a long journey ahead, but I know that progress is being made and this is what fuels me to push to become a more balanced, healthy, holistic, and dynamic person.

I’m excited to join my fellow steemians in this growing community where I hope to contribute in a genuine and meaningful way. I look forward to posting about mental, emotional, physical, and relational struggles and progress, as well as sharing my journey to becoming a lesbian and my exodus from religion. Life is a complex, ever-changing experience that’s better discovered together. Let’s make the most of this opportunity to have our voices heard and rewarded as we engage with one another on Steemit.