RE: Secrets, Lies, and the Need to Share Knowledge for Lie-Detection and Greater Understanding
This is a little off topic...
What most people do not know is that their exists narcissists / psychopaths. Further, from movies, people think these are way over the top so evil its easy to see characters.
But, they are not.
They may even be your mother and my mother.
Narcissist lie, incessantly.
They will tell one group of people one thing, and another something else.
They will play the groups off of each other.
Bringing people into "co-conspiratorial" status.
They will even play their children off of each other.
Imagine destroying the happiness and well being over your child merely for your entertainment. This is not a sometimes happening, this is an always, always on, continuous until they die, happening.
People do not know about these creatures and their destructive ways. They, judging by their normal selves, would never ever think of playing people that much. That someone would gaslight another to the point of invoking insanity. Having such thoughts would be reprehensible to the normal.
Normal people think that there is usually two sides of the story. She said, he said. Yeah we get that. But, do you ever think that what you were told about someone else is a complete fabrication in order to get you to do something to them?
So it is when working on govern-cement projects. You think it is important to stay hush hush, because of the lie you were told makes it seem appropriate. Well, the other levels / departments were told a different lie. It is how narcissists operate.
My oh my @builderofcastles ....what you just said. No happy endings in that situation. Statistically, there are suppose to be 11% in the population but I think it is much higher. They completely lack empathy and their whole identity is based on a false facade they put out to the world - they depend on it.
Awareness of this is paramount to changing the ugly that is happening. The problem is that most people can't comprehend something so foreign to their being. It is very difficult to wrap your mind around someone being so deceptive or doing something so terrible.
I believe the number is lower than 11%.
However, these people are like errant alpha particles that go and cause a uranium atom to fission, and then to the next, and then the next.
In dating, one psychopath can destroy 10 men. Making them almost useless for dating.
And, our pyramidal structures attract them to the top positions. So, where ever the TV camera points, we see a disproportionate amount of them. They are what's entertaining. They are in all the spot lights. They are really in our face.
And we do not recognize them.
The 'covert' narcissists are the real dangerous types (more introverted). They are not necessarily in the spot light like the 'overt' narcissist. At least with the overt narcissist, you know what you're getting (they brag and pump themselves up) and they can have some capacity for empathy. Not with a covert narcissist - they target vulnerable people and take their rage out on them in secret - get pleasure from it (because it's a feeling they can feel). Both of these 'need' other people to validate them. And often these two personalities have additional psychopathies attached.
Psychopaths and sociopaths don't need other people, but all 3 of these types lack empathy which can make them dangerous because they also feel superior over others.
I would agree that a lot of these personalities occupy top positions of power.
I do recognize them, but it's taken me a very long time to understand and know that this behavior has a name and that they do not think and feel like everyone else. They truly don't.
And yes, they will destroy everyone around them and create a mountain of chaos.
The covert narcissists are indeed very dangerous when dating, or just a random in the workplace.
They do not have the drive to get to the top, or more specifically, they get nothing from being in the spotlight. But, the covert narcissist could be anywhere, and they will suck you in, then suck you dry.
After they are through with you, you will doubt your ability to tell which way is up.
I have 'two' in my family. I understand. Awareness.
Sorry you had this experience. What doesn't break us, makes us stronger and wiser ;)
Indeed, compartmentalization works well to keep people from talking to each others in governments, and narcissists, liars and manipulators need that isolation to keep people from communicating and figuring out the real truth about what is going on.