Is life fair?
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Is life fair?
It is no only as moderators and curators but as Steemians that we can tell all about the lives of our fellow Steemians, their worries, their successes, their journeys, their daily activities, their families and their expectations.
From me reading these posts it brought back the question of, is life fair?
I think this is one of the most difficult and also troublesome questions to answer.
I studied law at a late stage in my life. During this period I helped a friend of mine in his law practise. He had a case where he had to defend a client and in my heart I knew this guy was guilty yet I also knew that he deserved a fair trial. In the end my friend won the case.
My first words to him was; “It is not fair”. His reply; “Life is not fair”.
I think most people and it includes me will say that life has never been fair and it will never be fair.
I also think that most of us base our answer on every day experiences.
• Babies are born still
• Pandemics like COVID-19 cross our paths
• The high cost of living
• The loss of a job
• Pressure for achieving
What we experience in our day to day activities forms the ultimate experience of life. You might not think that standing in line to catch a bus, driving to work at traffic times or watching news on television is having an influence on how experience life. It does!
You might be experiencing a bad day. The manner in which you handle your experiences can not only have an impact on that specific day but it can also affect your life totally.
The fairness of life can also be formed by our own perception . How we feel as a person about life in general, the life of others and mainly our own lives. It is that all too familiar “a glass half full or half empty”.
In the end we need to remember that we are all different and that brings along different perceptions.
Is it our behaviour that causes us to think that life is unfair? The biggest influence of how we feel not only emotionally but also physically is our behaviour. Our behaviour can leave so many things unsaid and undone which can make us think that life is unfair.
On the flip side our behaviour can never undo the things we have said nor the things we have done.
Changing our feelings and what we do can give us a whole new perspective on life. It might even push us to say that life is fair.
It might be something totally different which makes us think life is unfair like expectations. Is it not that we expect from life so that it can benefit us?
What about emotions? I have seen many employees who could not work through their problems and in the end it left their emotions drained and left them under performed in their jobs.
When we feel that we are being loved, that we belong, that we are save and that we are praised for doing well it can take our emotions to a high leaving us with a feeling that life is fair.
If you are on the winning side of life I am sure your answer will differ from most people. What will you say if things starts falling apart?
I doubt it very much that you will still say that life is fair.
To date I have not heard one person saying that life is fair. Have you?
What I do know is that life was not designed to be unfair. It was designed to be a blessing, a wonderful adventure which we only get to enjoy for a very short time.
What I also know is that life is what you make of it.
The Amerian poet Robert Frost wrote –
“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.”
In one of his poems “The road not taken”, he writes about a traveller who has to make a decision on which road he must continue his journey.
That is what life is all about, making the right decision at the right time and not about whether it is fair or unfair. After all, you are king on your chess board.
My advice to you.
Put that sticky note on your screen, on you fridge, wherever you find it best, that states that you must;
This is actually a very interesting topic to discuss, I understand justice as a hope, hope for me and hope for all to get what they deserve. But the fact is that justice is not taking sides and is not in line with expectations.
I have experienced a case that became a valuable lesson in life, at that time around 2005 I had participated in a permanent job selection, I had prepared it for almost 1 year, bought various types of books for me to study, finally I was ready to take part in the academic selection to graduate and get the job.
I also finished all the 200 questions well, I am confident with every answer I wrote because of the perfect preparation.
What was the result? I didn't even get into the top 5 rankings, instead other participants who only sat for 15 minutes and then left the selection room were declared passed during the announcement.
I only found out in more detail about this case when I went to the head office for the second selection, there based on data from the office staff, it was stated that I had passed the selection and while showing the list of those who passed the previous year's selection.
I am very disappointed, and this is a fact of injustice that I have experienced, but I take lessons from every incident, that the injustice that I experienced was the best for me for the next life.
Basically in other aspects I have the same opinion as you, but even though I have tried my best, it still seems like justice does not exist because justice is satisfaction and humans will never be satisfied even though they have gained many things.
I can feel your pain my friend. We sit in a similar position as you.
My stepdaughter wanted to study medicine after school. All she ever wanted was to become a doctor.
She worked so hard. Study from early in the morning until late at night and never took a day rest.
In fact in the process she put her family aside. We all said we understand and that it is for her best.
She applied at 4 universities and was declined at all four because of the wrong skin colour. That after she obtained 3 subjects 90+ % and 4 subjects 85+ %.
Is this fair?
She is now furthering her studies in medical science with the hope that she can change to medicine and the end of year.
I hate to think how she is going to react if she is declined for the 2nd time.
In the end I suppose life is a little bit of both.
I think life cannot be fair. People can and should be fair. When they are not, on occasion, it is a cause for complaint. And that is exactly what people complain about: unfair behaviour by people. Life is simply life. We have no other.
Ich denke, das Leben kann nicht fair sein. Menschen können und sollten fair sein. Wenn sie das fallweise nicht sind, ist es ein Grund zur Klage. Und genau darüber wird auch geklagt: über unfaires Verhalten von Menschen. Das Leben ist einfach das Leben. Wir haben kein anderes.
Ah ha! My wise German friend.
All that remains for me to add to your post is...
"Life is simply life. We have no other"... and we cannot change it.
Thank you! Your interaction is always appreciated.
When I'm wise, you are too ;-))) You bring me to think about big problems and reduce them to one clear point.
I for one have never believed the words that life rewards the hard worker.
I believe that life and good things come to most people by luck. Sometimes because the person worked so hard for it, he believes that he deserves it at the end. But in reality there was someone who worked harder than him or her but never made it.
In all I think our biggest problem is that we look at what people have and wish that we could have what those people had and then in turn we become sad(jealous); but to pamper our jealous minds we say they are lucky to have those things.
My advice is, look ahead, set a target for what you want in life. Chase those dreams, work for what you want and then when life favours you at the end you can say “life has been fair”
Ah! So you also think that life was not designed to be unfair, “life has been fair”. It is us who makes life unfair.
Just imagine how boring life would have been if it was totally fair.(•ิ‿•ิ)
In conclusion, as you said, chase your dreams!
Thank you for your visit and engagement.
Yh that’s what I think sometimes 😂
You are welcome.
This is the summary of the whole story and question. Seating back to question if life is fair or not will only sap us the strength, energy and wisdom to make wise decision. Our minds will be blurred and we can't see clearly. Our approach to any situation is what matters. When we are positive, then life itself will seem fair to us. Thanks for this creative writing, I enjoyed every bit of it
It is for me to say thank you for your visit and your reply my friend.
There is one thing I can add to your reply and that is that so often when we feel that life is not fair there is that one person who you can rely on to pull you through.
Thank you for being that friend!! 🎕
You too are such a friend. I am glad that steemit brought us together
Yes I agree with it all, maybe we've heard the words "what is life if there's no problem", this word has a million meanings that you've inadvertently answered all of them in this very inspiring post
Thank you for the visit my friend.
I don’t think we will ever understand life. Then on the other hand, why should we?
All that is needed is for us to have fun and to live it to the fullest.
Hi, my friend,
This thought invades us at times, thinking that life is not fair and that we are in a hostile world.
What I have learned is that we have to learn to live life. As you have said, our behavior is important in forming this concept.
I look at life sometimes as a jungle, you have to know how to walk in it. Other times like a race that you have to know how to enjoy and stop and enjoy the scenery.
We can do very little to influence or change things, but we are responsible for the part that touches us.
By the way, I would not have defended the one I knew was guilty, because I feel that it is important to stand up for our beliefs. It is true that perhaps he deserves a fair trial, but... is it fair that a de facto guilty person be declared innocent...?
Well, maybe we get into rough philosophical terrain hahaha.
I enjoyed reading you, greetings and blessings to you.
Thank you! I loved reading your reply.
As for the law case, I suppose it is a bit of a catch twenty situation.
My son is a doctor and he once had to save the life of a murderer who was shot on the scene and in a serious condition. What do you do?
You took an oath to save a life but deep inside your are so cross with the person for killing his family that you feel he doesn't deserve to be saved.
In the end life is a balancing act between fair and unfair. (•ิ‿•ิ)
This seems very wrong to me.
To say to somebody "you're no longer worth living" is god-like and not suitable (and so I decline the penalty of death).
I suggest that we can feed a hope: that even a murderer can change his mind and can work at his/her character and can try to get a healer. This hope we should feed - so I want to suggest - especially if we don't know (and that's the normal case) which evil was done before to the later criminal. I don't want to suggest that all criminals should be hugged but that they should treated as fair as possible.
More than once I asked myself: would I - if occasion would have been given to me - have been able to killing Adolf H.? Not in persuasion of his cruel crimes but in preventing them before done. Would I? If someone gave me a ticket to ride into - let's say - 1920?
Oh gosh! I would have liked to see AH run from you my friend. (•ิ‿•ิ)
Like they say, "You would have given him a good run for his money"
Thisreply really got me thinking
Fair or unfair
Rescue or revenge
Compassion or justice
A dice of two opposite sides. The decision still belongs to us to make but vengeance isnt our part. Humans cant even render proper justice too.
Oh wow! What a nice comparison. "A dice with two opposite sides".
The beauty is that we are not left with the faith of a gamble but that we are left with real life of which we are in control.
Thank you for your great reply! 🎕
Yes. We're in control
Indeed! We are in control of our lives.. our destiny!
Fair or unfair? Good question my dear @patjewell.
As you say, it depends on the perception we have at that moment, but what I have learned is that everything happens for a greater purpose, sometimes we do not understand the reason for this, but life itself and its journey is giving us the answers that before we did not understand or see, as if they were pieces of a puzzle.
There are many situations where I have asked myself why? and that what it brings is frustration, that's why now I just think: I don't know what I should learn from this yet but I hope to find out soon, and little by little I am accepting the designs of life itself.
Ah ha! You've nailed it!
Life is in our hands and there is a greater purpose for us being alive. All we need to do is to accept and to move on as life goes on.. and on.. and on.
Thank you for your interaction. 🎕
I think life is a little bit of both
O ja! Dit hang af of jy kan visvang of nie (•ิ‿•ิ)
This is a very powerful post🔥
Making the right decisions at the right time is everything in life🔥🚀
Best of all... so often it is not the right decision but that cannot be your reason for saying that life is not fair. What remains is to just do it again!
Thank you for reading and engaging with my post. It is appreciated!
Your article makes me to remember one of the statements that one of my friends used to say: "life is not balanced". Sometimes, life tints as being good towards some people whom we think they don't deserve it, and being unfair towards some people whom we think deserve goodness.
That's life...
Whatever definition you give to life, just make sure you do what's right, as little as it may be.
You got a very clever friend! You better tell him that I say so.
Life is not balanced... I will remember these words.
Just think how boring life would have been if it was balanced.
Thank you for stopping by!